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*enizen

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< Prev1234567891011Next > [41 pages, 1618 answers]

What's the best way for me to appraoch this girl?

Q.   Hi I'm having a problem with getting any sort of connection with a girl I have become friends with. We met at college and have been in group tasks etc and we got on really well I have real feelings towards her but have tried to talk to her via ...

A.   22 December 2017: You could try asking her to join you for a pizza at the best pizza house near you. If she says no, then she may not be that interested. Social media isn't the place to start broadcasting your feelings to be honest. The relative anonymity of the inte... (read in full...)

I'm sinking into depression over this girl

Q.   Okay, just to start off my life has been going completely downhill. It's a long story and has been going on for about 3 years now, but here goes: There's a girl. She's perfect for me; she's pretty much the definition of what I want in a girl. ...

A.   22 December 2017: It can be hard when you put someone on a pedestal and then they don't live up to your idea of them. Have you asked the girl you like out? They say feint heart never won fair lady. If you don't ask, you don't get. As for yourself, don't put your... (read in full...)

My boyfriend doesn't want to be near me when I am sick.

Q.   Dear Cupid I'm with my bf for past 2 years and it's going on good and we meet on weekends and stay together on weekend. One thing that concerns me, not sure if I should be, he doesn't want to meet and around me whenever I'm sick, he says he doesn...

A.   22 December 2017: What kind of, 'sick', are you talking about?... (read in full...)

My boyfriend wants me to do stuff, I feel stuck!

Q.   Okay so me and my boyfriend have been togetehr for a while now and he wants to go further. I’m not sure if i’m quite ready for anything because i haven’t done anything since my last boyfriend. Me and him both have don’t stuff, but with other people ...

A.   22 December 2017: Whether or not you let him have a grope is up to you. If his technique is crude you might want to give it a miss until he learns better. However leave the full-on sex until you are older. There are a lot of issues which come with the physical act ... (read in full...)

I am never approached by men

Q.   I am about to turn 23 in a year and I have never ever been approached by any guy anywhere before in my life nor have I ever dated anyone. I know it is not due to my weight because I am thin and petite (some people tell me that I even look as young ...

A.   22 December 2017: What is your question? Is it how to be more attractive? Is it on tips to seduce men? Is it on where to find the right man? Is it how to behave or what to wear? Not knowing any of this let me start by telling you to be a good listener. Men often like... (read in full...)

I don't think I can ever trust again...Even my family

Q.   Generally, I am not open at all. Not shy either. Just prefer to keep things private and off limits. This has happened because I've lost trust so many times that I built up this barrier, and I know it's unhealthy. But that's happened because of ...

A.   20 December 2017: Sorry but I don't quite understand what your question is. You tell us you can't confide in your family. I'm sorry to hear that. Do you have a bestie you can trust? The answer is don't tell people things you don't want them, or others to know. N... (read in full...)

How do I get started with her?

Q.   Little background: I'm a male virgin who's never kissed a girl or been on a date. Total geek, overweight, and not handsome/physically attractive in anyway. Basically no redeeming qualities for the opposite sex. I've long thought about just seein...

A.   19 December 2017: Oh brother, where do I start? 'No' to the idea of trying to date someone at work. It will just become embarrassing. Next, get in shape. Why not? Make yourself more presentable. Being a geek doesn't mean you can't be fit. Next, you seem to be looki... (read in full...)

Did this Married Man forget his former mistress already?

Q.   I dated a Married Man (MM) for a year and a half. We both worked at my dad’s office. He got caught by his wife 3 times but never left me. The 3rd time he got caught things got pretty bad. He started going to counseling and distanced himself from me. ...

A.   19 December 2017: You are thinking of yourself and your loss. It is time to move into your new future. Falling in love can be difficult to avoid even when you know it is wrong. Well, he has made his choice. Now you need to go and find someone who can be truly yours.... (read in full...)

21 year old currently lost in the world, any help?

Q.   Hello all, Lately, I have grown incredibly depressed. It seems like last year, I had everything I could of wanted at the time. I had a boyfriend, I lived in a nice house, I had a great and fun job, I had a good relationship with my co-...

A.   19 December 2017: First thing, stop doing 'poor me'. You don't need other people to help you join clubs, choirs, evening classes, volunteering etc. Enrol in lots of things. Also, exercise is essential. Walking is free so don't make cost a negative factor. If you have... (read in full...)

My sister is toxic and bitter, and she hates me, what do I do about her?

Q.   Dear aunts, I have a sister who I love only for the fact that she is my blood, but everything else about her I just can't stand because we have a toxic relationship ever since I was a kid she always told me that I'm ugly, that I'm dumb, that i am ...

A.   18 December 2017: Just leave her out of the equation. She is jealous of you and until she feels good about herself it will never change. Some siblings never get on. It's a fact of life. You two aren't unusual. Just accept that you are going to live separate live... (read in full...)

Will I never be with my soulmate? It seems fate is keeping us apart

Q.   I met the love of my life when I was 14, we fell in love so deep. The world was our oyster, growing together year after year, experiencing every 1st thing together. Bad and good. Both our life’s were tragically twisted and I made a mistake when I w...

A.   16 December 2017: If you believe in the concept of soul mates then you must accept that soul mates don't stay together in this lifetime. We have all had first loves but life moves on. We grow and expand our experience. Be thankful for what you had. If you want to r... (read in full...)

Do I need to step out of my bubble with this outgoing guy?

Q.   Hello Aunts and Uncles I'm not in any precarious situation but just looking for some advice on things in my relationship i've just not encountered before. About two years ago I left a long term relationship, it was wholly amicable and ende...

A.   16 December 2017: Would it hurt you to respond a little more quickly to his acts of kindness and support? Some things we do spontaneously, like apologising to a complete stranger we might bump into, or thanking a medic for a painful treatment. Here is someone ... (read in full...)

I always seek validation, but I shouldn't really need it!

Q.   Why do I attract these men or better yet these people in my life? Hello aunts I am turning 32 next month and I am at a dead end with men . I have stoped daring and having sex for the last year an a half but I don’t jnow why I attract men that are ...

A.   13 December 2017: You spent most of your post telling us it isn't really your fault. That isn't true. It is your fault. You befriend people for the wrong reasons. You also haven't learned to recognise men who are, to quote you: 'Negligent- self centred - and ... (read in full...)

I'm doing all the work in the relationship!

Q.   I have been dating this guy for 3 months now. I really love him and feel like he could possible be the one to walk into my future with. He carries a lot of baggage in regards to sexual abuse, drug abuse and so on. He is taking anti-depressants ...

A.   13 December 2017: You have picked the wrong one unless you want to have the future suffering his inability to cope with life. You have dated for three months. That isn't long. Step away unless you want endless hurt and disappointment. You may have self-sacrifice writ... (read in full...)

I want to help my niece but I'm not sure how to do so

Q.   So, I have a niece that just turned 18 and I just turned 25, my sister had her early and our parents had me when they were a little older. So, my niece has always been very shy and quite. But she started to break out of her shell when she was in ...

A.   13 December 2017: Your niece is 18 and so legally an adult and responsible for herself. When you are out together do you speak to her about her life? It sounds as if the close family may all be dysfunctional. That would be nigh impossible for you to unravel on your... (read in full...)

I need help to control his binge drinking

Q.   I need some advice. My husband has a problem with binge drinking. He can't stop at a couple and will just keep on drinking to he passes out. We don't really drink at home so it's only a problem if he goes out for drinks with friends. He normally ...

A.   9 December 2017: This needs a two pronged approach. Long term he needs professional help. You might have to decide together what that will be. It could be your GP, AA, counselling etc. On the immediate front get hold of his friends or workmates and tell them to look... (read in full...)

What do I do about this weird attraction for my teacher?

Q.   Lately, I've been feeling a weird attraction towards my teacher, I know it sounds inappropriate, but I really like him! Some days, I can't stop thinking about him, but other days, I just feel uncomfortable around him, I know that most of you reading ...

A.   7 December 2017: This question has come up many times before. You can check the files for previous answers. It is a common occurrence. Just keep it as a fantasy because trying to make it real will only bring disaster. I mean, have you ever heard of a student teacher ... (read in full...)

My husband is having an affair with a woman half his age and lies about it!

Q.   Married 19 years my husband 54 is having an affair with a girl who is 27 he sits with her in different areas of the city and goes to her house when we go to church he knows that I know and continues to lie about everything what should I do?...

A.   7 December 2017: What do you think you should do? Do you want to ignore it? Do you want to confront him and try to patch things up? Or do you want to get a divorce and a fresh start? The choice is yours. Being deceived cuts deep. It is hard for people to get over... (read in full...)

Dealing with low self-esteem and body image from acne scars

Q.   Hi guys, I have been dating a guy for close to 2 months. We have a great connection and i really like him. But he cares too much about physical appearance. I think I am good looking, both body and face, but have hypopigmented acne scars on my...

A.   7 December 2017: If he can't accept you he isn't the one for you. It's as simple as that. Be honest. You can't help it. Good luck with the dermatologist. Make sure he is a good one.... (read in full...)

I have feelings for my drug addicted friend's girlfriend

Q.   Hey guys! I'll try be brief. So I have a friend who is going psychotic due to his drug use that he denies to a psychotic extent. He twists reality and makes everyone his enemy if they try to confront him (I have tried a few times and he angrily l...

A.   6 December 2017: Of course she needs a clean break from him before embarking on any other romance. If you move in too soon you will only concern his paranoid suspicions. The consequences one can only imagine. ... (read in full...)

My long time friend is distancing herself from me and I am not sure why

Q.   I have a friend that ive been close with for years, we told each other everything and did everything together. Shes been a big part of my life but this following year i sense a change... I’ve been so busy with work and school 6 days a week I am ...

A.   6 December 2017: Perhaps she is bored with your company. It happens. Direct your attention elsewhere - new friends new pursuits... If she doesn't want your company, for what ever reason, she doesn't and that's it. Get on with YOUR life.... (read in full...)

Desperately in love with my teacher

Q.   Hello everyone. I'm a sixteen year old girl and I have this one teacher who is just the most amazing guy ever. He's really smart, funny, and his personality is wonderful ;I'm just so in love. I have never really been in an intimate relationship with ...

A.   6 December 2017: Go and talk to the teacher in charge of pastoral care at your school. He or she is there to deal with just this sort of situation. He will help you through this fraught period in your life.... (read in full...)

Boyfriend is really depressed what should I do 

Q.   My boyfriend is really depressed, we have been going out for 2 month and hes saying he feels on a scale of 1 - 10 ( 10 feeling really good ) that hes about a 2 . He has been seeing the doctor and a mental health worker but i dont feel hes getting ...

A.   4 December 2017: Leave it to the professionals. There is no quick fix. Keep in touch by all means, but don't pester him. Part of his recovery will be about him wanting to go out and find things he enjoys. You can't force him. ... (read in full...)

Should I try and talk to him again?

Q.   Hey, I'm new to this community and I just want to thank everyone who reads this! So, for the last 2years I've been simply experiencing phisical relationships with other people and 6 months ago I meet someone with whom I really could picture a ...

A.   4 December 2017: No, he's not that interested and probably too busy too - which amounts to the same thing. As for still wanting him, well perhaps there is a little bit of not being able to have something that is making you keener. By the way, if I were you I woul... (read in full...)

Is it too soon to after he left me?

Q.   Hi. I had a short relationship only 3 months (but very intense holidays etc) I really thought I had met someone who could handle me - i have bipolar - however he ended it saying as he lived so far away he couldn't help me when I needed it. I was so ...

A.   2 December 2017: You can go out with them but don't look for too much to begin with. Keep it light and friendly. And if I could suggest, no sex yet. Letting someone into life doesn't mean letting them straight into your pants. There aren't really any rules but just... (read in full...)

Bereavement has hit our relationship

Q.   My partner's ex girlfriend killed herself 6 weeks ago, he took his pain + grief out on me. We have been together 6 years + 3 children. I don't see a way back. He is sleeping on the sofa since. Is it time to walk away. ...

A.   2 December 2017: You need to give him time and space. I don't think walking way when you have three children is a great idea. I'm sorry you are getting the rough end of this. It isn't fair but it is part of the burden you accept when you commit to one person. You go ... (read in full...)

I want to have fun but it leaves me feeling guilty

Q.   Im on my first twennies, basically my parents are pretty strict. I've always been the good girl that never hides anything from her parents. I've never lied to them about anyhting or done anything that they dont approve with. I moved from australia ...

A.   1 December 2017: You have to fill your life with experience, but you have to learn from that experience. Ninety nine per cent of the Aunts know, from experience, that getting drunk feels awful the next day; that you can't hold down a job if you are out every night; ... (read in full...)

I'm scared to break up with my boyfriend because of the repercussions it could have on both of us

Q.   I’ve been with my boyfriend for around 6 months now, I do love him but it’s long distance and when we’re together it’s amazing but when we aren’t we fall very quickly in arguing everyday. I think it would be best for us to break up instead of ...

A.   1 December 2017: I have said this to others but it remains true. Sometimes you have to let go of things in order that something better can come into you life. The fact that you are long distance should make it easier. Your shared commitments will be fewer than if y... (read in full...)

Is he really out of town? Was I played? Did he really like me at all? Or was I just a girl in his back pocket during the few months we were together?

Q.   During the summer I was approached by a guy in the city. He complimented me on my outfit and we started up a little chat and we exchange numbers. Fast ward we eventually went out on our first date a few weeks after meeting. We talked everyday pretty ...

A.   1 December 2017: It just sounds like a casual encounter to me. I don't think he was using you particularly, or didn't like you. He just wasn't aiming for romance, just company. If you are looking for a serious long-term relationship then find someone in your neck... (read in full...)

Does she want my help?

Q.   Hi guys... Well, there's this girl. I see her almost every day at NA meetings. NA stands for Narcotics Anonymous. Yes, both of us are recovering addicts... We're doing really fine, she's been clean for a year and a half now and myself for about...

A.   28 November 2017: Find a mutual friend or at least a friend of hers who knows how she is and ask after her. Find out what is going on in her life. Then you will be better informed as how to act.... (read in full...)

I have these gut feelings she's cheating so how do I figure out what I do?

Q.   I'm a female in a relationship with another female. I have trust issues due to previous infidelities in past relationships. I know that it's unfair for me to question her when she's done nothing wrong, but, honest to god, I can't help it. I feel ...

A.   27 November 2017: In a loving relationship there has to be trust. That means you have to be open to being hurt. That doesn't mean you have to wander around with your eyes closed. So accept what you have and stop worrying, otherwise you will be eaten away inside. I... (read in full...)

Should I tell my son that his girlfriend is cheating on him?

Q.   My sons girlfriend is cheating on him??? Both she and my son are 25 and have been together for just over 9 years. I received an e-mail from someone who has sent me evidence that she has been cheating on him for the past 5 years with his BFF. I ...

A.   26 November 2017: You should tell her that you know she is cheating, you have corroboration, and that if she doesn't tell him then you will. Give her the chance to do the right thing. If she won't, then tell your son to ask her where she was last night, or to ask ... (read in full...)

I was a virgin, didn't bleed and now my husband says I wasn't a virgin

Q.   It was totally my first intercourse, but i did'nt bleed....i only felt a very little pain...even my hubby said that i'm not virgin as my vagina is loose. He said my vagina is not like virgins have.... But It was my first time. Why it happens to...

A.   26 November 2017: I'm sure, if you check online, you will find plenty of information about this. Also your parents will vouchsafe your honour regarding your behaviour before before you were married. If your husband is just looking for a reason to take another ... (read in full...)

Why has my boyfriend started lying about petty things?

Q.   My boyfriend has started lying . Instead of wanting to see me this weekend he told me he was looking after a family member ( child under age 10 without the parents ) who was visiting . Yet i know that was a lie as i saw him walking around town on ...

A.   26 November 2017: The easiest thing is to ask. You want us to guess, but that won't help you. You need to form your own assessment of his answers. Will he come clean about his motives or will he try and wheedle out of giving an honest answer. You then have to deci... (read in full...)

I like her but I'm confused

Q.   So me and this girl have been talking for quite a while now. I didn't want to rush into anything and we like eachother lots but I don't know i'm confused about it.I really like her but on the other hand, I feel like i'm not good enough for her. I'm ...

A.   24 November 2017: First work on your depression. Get exercise and medical help if it is serious. It could be that you aren't depressed, just sad or a bit unhappy. Teenage years can be like that. Next, work on your looks. Be clean, tidy and wear clothes you feel good... (read in full...)

Please counsel me on this man

Q.   Hello, I am 46 years old. I met a man from the US online and over two years we have been talking on the phone and communicating via email. We got along very well and he told me he would visit in January of the second year of our meeting. When the ...

A.   22 November 2017: Run a mile from this. It stinks to high heaven. Don't even worry what the motives are. You don't need any of his or his daughters complications in your life. Cut the ties immediately. There is nothing good in it for you.... (read in full...)

Caught her in a lie. What now?

Q.   Two years ago I was ghost. I treated her really well. She told me before that she runs when a man starts falling for her, so I never contact an ex, that's how I, get my closure, but a friend told me about a site, where you can look up people’s, ...

A.   22 November 2017: She is your ex isn't she? Have I understood that correctly? Why are you researching her now? You clearly haven't moved on if you are raking through the past. My friend, madness lies that way. Look to the future not the past.... (read in full...)

I need to help my parents know I'm an adult

Q.   Hi, I posted a question a few days ago and felt like after getting some responses, I feel quite insecure of my plan. So, I’m 18 years, 19 soon, brought up with an Asian Chinese background. So I got re-in touch with an old friend of mine who I lost ...

A.   22 November 2017: Parents eh? What can you do with them? First piece of advice is to stop conforming to their idea of you. You say: "If I mention about a guy and say we want to meet up, they'll immediately make some kind of judgement of the boy and probably say no to ... (read in full...)

Am I reasonable to choose money over potential happiness?

Q.   Dear aunts, I am in a fix as I type this. I made a first attempt at online dating about 7 months ago and the only guy I really had an interest in, we hit it off. It was rocky at first but we are amazing now and not a day goes by without us chatting ...

A.   21 November 2017: Umh! I'm not sure you were really hearing the advice and warnings the aunts were handing you. If you find yourself penniless in Europe you could just simply disappear off the map. You need enough money of your own to be self-determining. You need ... (read in full...)

Am I reasonable to choose money over potential happiness?

Q.   Dear aunts, I am in a fix as I type this. I made a first attempt at online dating about 7 months ago and the only guy I really had an interest in, we hit it off. It was rocky at first but we are amazing now and not a day goes by without us chatting ...

A.   19 November 2017: I think you have oversimplified your situation and perhaps wrongly identified your problem. From what you tell me you only have this man as a kind of pen pal. You are friends. You may have exchanged a few confidences but you don't really know what ... (read in full...)

Where do you go to meet momen?

Q.   I still don't get where a guy is supposed to try and meet single women. Why is it so hard at my age? Everyone says that gym is a bad idea.. the bar is a bad idea, workplace is off limits, etc. You can't approach a woman at the park because you will ...

A.   18 November 2017: If you have posted this question to make a point then I think you have a good one. There are a lot of taboos and no-go areas. However if you are seriously asking at your age then I have to wonder. Do you not have friends? Don't you go out with them... (read in full...)

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