What do men really mean when they say they "can't be in a relationship"?
Q. A question for men: What do you realy mean when you tell a woman you cant be in a "relationship"?...
A. 12 August 2008: Hi there,
i believe the modern term for it is : committment phobes. There seem to be an awful lot of men around you woo women with all sorts of promises then when the women finally reciprocate they go walkabouts. We see this on dear cupid al... (read in full...)
Married, and thought I was over being bi. What's going on?
Q. Dear All A really strange thing happened to me...I used to be bi sexual . .. well umm not exactly. i was just influenced by some lesbian gfs and i got it on with a girl.. Also at that time my parents were very strict and i wasnt allowed to date ...
A. 11 August 2008: Hi ,
i think you are confusing your bi-sexuality ( which is obvious by the way) with a compulsion to cheat on your partner.
Your bi-sexuality has nothing to do with your feelings for this other girl. We all have ex girlfriends/boyfriends who we m... (read in full...)
How should I go about this with my ex/girlfriend?
Q. my girlfriend have been going out for 4 months and we had broken up about 2 weeks ago and we have been kinda off and on we also declared that we love eachother about 2 weeks before the break up she would ask me "love me yet" and i wouldnt say it ...
A. 11 August 2008: Hi,
you not telling her you loved her was probably the deal breaker for her. When you tell someone you love them and they um and errr in reply, it can be a big kick to the self confidence. This is where guy number two came in to the equation, she ... (read in full...)
What do men really mean when they say they "can't be in a relationship"?
Q. A question for men: What do you realy mean when you tell a woman you cant be in a "relationship"?...
A. 11 August 2008: Hi,
it can mean many things, but none of them are good especially if you want a relationship.
At best he has someone else and just wants no strings sex and companionship...at worst he doesnt want anything more to do with you.
none of them are goo... (read in full...)
My fiancee has been having a secret sex life with men!
Q. I recently discovered that my boyfriend has been living a secret life. He had meet meeting men online and having sexual relations with them. When I first found out he said nothing happened, he was just curious and he still says he is only curious ...
A. 11 August 2008: Hi there,
you really are in a tough spot . Any thoughts about a normal life surely are now out the window. It would be great if you could go as a couple to therapy together and over time he may very well learn to deal with these issues.
But t... (read in full...)
Is it over before it's started?
Q. I've been with my husband for 2 years (but only married for about 6 weeks) - we got married mainly for practical reasons, he's in the forces and lives abroad and the only way i could live with him was to marry him. Before the wedding I was 100% sure ...
A. 11 August 2008: Hi,
you do sound very confused. And I think you may just be convincing yourself that your were 100% committed to the wedding. I rather doubt it, if you were you wouldnt have simply fallen for another man so quickly.
I think the marriage is ... (read in full...)
An ex I'm deeply in love with recently came back into my life. But I'm noe engaged. Help
Q. hi, i am really in a jam here. i am engaged to my fiance of 5 years and recently connected with my ex boyfriend. my ex and i never really broke up. he left the country and never returned till now. and we still have so much love for each other. he ...
A. 11 August 2008: Hi,
it all must seem so exciting. You never had any closure and now he's back on the scene playing with your heartstrings.
Take a step back, and ask yourself do you really love your fiance? If you do then tell your ex that it was great seeing h... (read in full...)
We have been together for four years, married one, lately I have become dissatisfied with our sex life, I want more with intensity, he cannot last long enough to satisfy me, I love him, he is caring, but I need more from him, what to do?
Q. i am 22 years old. i met my husband when i was 18 and he was 27. he was my first in everything. we've been together for 4 years and married 1 out of those 4yrs. i love him with all my heart, but lately i started noticing changes in myself. it's kind ...
A. 8 August 2008: Hi,
It seems like you married a little early if you ask me. You probably needed to play the field for a few years but instead found your true love early in life.
Now you have some very awkward decisions to make. For a start I'm sure your husband... (read in full...)
Should I have an affair while my bf is in prison?
Q. The guy im with is locked up and im feeling so lonenly should i sleep with my close friend ? he dosnt come out intill jan 2009 thats A pretty long time ........
A. 6 August 2008: Hey there,
you seem so young to be putting your life on hold.
I'm sorry to say but you shouldnt be waiting for him at all, his employment prospects have now gone down the gurgler and something like 80% or so of offenders find themselves back in ... (read in full...)
He has been acting weird since finding pics of my ex!
Q. I'm really in love with my boyfriend, but last week he found some pictures of my ex in my flat that I had completely forgotten I even had. He was upset and asked if I was still in love with my ex. I told him I wasn't. Then a few days later my ex ...
A. 6 August 2008: Hi,
he is overreacting I'm afraid.
You are most likely going to have to put your foot down, this may just be the start of a deeper insecurity in him that will evolve over time, next he may start wanting to know about ALL your ex's and what you... (read in full...)
Do guys like short girls?
Q. do guys like short girls? im only 5ft but the guy i like is about 6ft, do you think he would like me even though im small?...
A. 6 August 2008: Hi,
I lurve small girls.. the smaller the better I say.. you can keep the girls with legs up to their armpits as they say.
I'm only 5 10' ( or 178cm's for the metric folk ) but there's something about a small girl which turns me on big time. I... (read in full...)
Did I fall in love with a slut without knowing it?
Q. Alright, My girlfriend and I sort of met one night while we were both out drinking, we ended up having sex that night, either of us knew anything about each other really more than our names. Yes, a one night stand. We both were extremely dr...
A. 6 August 2008: Hi mate,
the best thing you can do is let her go. Hopefully she will find someone who respects her for who she is not for the number of people she has slept with. She sounds like someone who has been waiting to meet a nice bloke, and she obvi... (read in full...)
My sometime boyfriend, is a serial cheater, but I like him, should I waste my time being with him?
Q. Is this guy worth my time? This guy i like and have known for over a year can be described like this. He is very smart and mysterious, but has a charm about him. Last summer, he broke up with his girlfriend and then started seeing me. All the time...
A. 5 August 2008: Hi there,
you have a problem my dear. There are plenty of girls out there like you and they end up having miserable relationships, the reason is simple: they are attracted to men who treat them poorly.
You know this man is not worth the effort, ... (read in full...)
Is anal sex always painful?
Q. My husband and I have a great sex life, however in the 4 years that I've known we've only had anal intercourse, successfully, twice. I consider myself sexually adventurous, but I am absolutely terrified about this for 2 reasons. M husband is VERY ...
A. 5 August 2008: Hi there,
if he is very well endowed , chances are its going to hurt all the time.
I am left wondering why you want to do it in the first place? Being adventurous in bed doesnt mean you have to have anal sex. I am just a little suspicious of men w... (read in full...)
I'm 13 years old, going to have sex for the first time. What position is best?
Q. I am 13 and me and My And My Boyfriend have been together for nearly 3 months now and i no he wants too have sex and so do i but i am a virgin so he will be my first. i am really scared.! What position is best for the first time? Everyone says ...
A. 5 August 2008: For a start he doesnt know what the hell he is talking about, all the information he is getting is from his dad's porn mags I would guess.
Secondly, you should really reconsider, at 13 are you old enough to take this step ? You may think you are ... (read in full...)
Married to a gay man - do I stay with him for the sake of the children?
Q. I am married with two children. Three years ago I found out my husband was having an affair with another man. He still lives at home and continues his relationship with this man. I don't have it in me to throw him out and get on with my life. I am ...
A. 4 August 2008: Hi,
the friends I have whose parents stayed together for the "sake of the children" wished they never had. All they recall is their parents putting on a front pretending to be happy for them, every single one of them has trust and commitment issu... (read in full...)
I'm Muslim and I think I've fallen for my best friend!
Q. I'm a muslim girl, and i think i have started to fall in love with my best mate. Im totally shocked with how i feel and cannot help it. We see eachother almost everyday, she drives round my house to hang out on lazy days, or were usually out ...
A. 4 August 2008: Hi,
Teenage sexuality is such a hard one to define. You may be a lesbian but you may also just be in a stage where another girl is so close to you you feel as though you should be physically involved.
At this stage in your life I would advise... (read in full...)
I had unprotected sex with her, cheated on her... now she's pregnant and wants money for an abortion!
Q. i was talking to this girl for about a month. she REALY liked me. and i was really into her too. we had sex a few times and we didnt use a condom one time. i ended up cheating on her with another girl. and the girl i was talking to found out. than ...
A. 4 August 2008: Hi,
you are writing this because you feel guilty at getting this girl pregnant. The blame is not to be rested solely at your feet, she should have insisted you use a condom ( and now you know for future use that having sex without a condom is dang... (read in full...)
Did my fiance cheat on me at his friend's bachelor party?
Q. My fiance went to his good friend bachelor party last night. Later that night I called him and he told me to come pick him up, I went to guy's appartment but they weren't there. I tried to called his phone like 10 times but he keep hanging up on ...
A. 4 August 2008: Hi,
He wouldn't have asked you to come pick him up if he was intending on sleeping with this girl. Think about that, it would be nuts!
Most likely he is trying to cover up for his friend, and knew you would not be happy seeing the two girls ha... (read in full...)
Do men prefer bad girls over good girls? What am I doing wrong?
Q. Do Men prefer Bad girls over good girl. I'm a pretty good girl, but I like to go out have fun, drink, smoke occassionally. I still know how to party and let my hair down. I think I'm a pretty good catch and don't have a problem attracting men. ...
A. 4 August 2008: Hi,
I think it is a combination of everything you mention in your post.
Firstly, guys like me run a mile from the "bad girls", after all who wants all the drama in your life? Bad girls are trouble, not commital and generally a pain in the behind. ... (read in full...)
He went to a strip club behind my back and lied about it for months!
Q. I am upset because my boyfriend lied to me about something I think is important. I'm not a big fan of strip clubs, and to me, it kind of seems like cheating if your boyfriend is looking at other chicks that are half naked. Anyhow, I was studying ...
A. 1 August 2008: Hi there,
first off let me say that I absolutely hate strip clubs. I can't see the point in paying good money to watch a drug addict take her clothes of. But a lot of men do like them, and even more will go for a bucks party, a one off with a coup... (read in full...)
How does chlamydia happen in a monogamous relationship?
Q. Hello, I have a very weird question. I have been with my man for a few years, in what I thought was a monogamous relationship. I got a checkup a while back, and they said I had chlamydia. They also said that chlamydia can only be spread through ...
A. 1 August 2008: Sorry mate, but you have to accept that your lovely boyfriend is a cheating rat.
Dump him, and move on with your life. This is your only choice.
sorry.... (read in full...)
I'm recently divorced and started dating this man, problem is his female friends!
Q. Hi Everyone, I have a slight dilemma.. I am 34 and so is he.. he has not had a girlfriend in 5 years....so I have been dating him for 6 months and everything is going well. We have established that we are b/f and g/f and we are monogamous. He ...
A. 1 August 2008: Hi,
I think there are two issues here.
One, his female friends. In his 30's he is bound to have past loves who he has remained friends with. It's not for everyone but a lot of people like to keep in touch with ex loves ( if this is a problem ... (read in full...)
I need to leave and fix my life but it is just so hard. Am I wrong? Do I need help?
Q. Well here is my situation. I was previously married to my high school sweetheart. We dated for 11 years and were married for 3. The second and third year of marriage was terrible. He worked a ton and so did I. I worked nights, weekends or day ...
A. 1 August 2008: Hi there,
I am really sorry to see you in this situation.
You seem very vulnerable at the moment and it really would be helpful if the people close to you could provide you with the support you obviously need.
Your husband hits you? but jokingl... (read in full...)
How can I get my man to cry during sex?
Q. I'm just a little curious I would like to know how many men out there have actually cried during sex and why?? I want to try to get my man to cry any tips, tricks, and or advice to help me with that on a serious note I've heard about men crying ...
A. 1 August 2008: Hi,
Ask him "is it in?"
that should produce a few tears.... (read in full...)
I've been rejected... again. What is wrong with me?
Q. Hi yet again I have been rejected. I don't know how much more rejection I can take anymore. I don't want to spend the rest of my life on my own but I'm so hurt at the moment. Last year my long term live in partner dumped me for someone he...
A. 31 July 2008: Hi,
don't give up that's my advice. The modern dating world unfortunately is full of freaks and losers who populate the electronic dating world messing with people with good intentions heads. They convince themselves they can commit where in reali... (read in full...)
Men, do you discuss details of your sex lives with your buddies?
Q. I have a question for the men. Do you guys discuss what happens in the bedroom with your male buddies, or best friends? I'd like to think what happens in the bedroom stays in the bedroom. Do you guys compare notes and tell each other if she was...
A. 31 July 2008: Only if its a one night stand. And even then its pretty vague. But it all depends on the sophistication level me thinks. Are rough and ready bloke will simply say: "corrr.she was a great shag ". A red wine drinking, leftie, tree hugging ... (read in full...)
The Understanding Male Species...or not?
Q. After reading several of the replies submitted by Agony Uncles here on Dear Cupid, I have come to realise, or should I say, believe, that the majority of them are really very sympathetic, kind, loving, caring ~ but most of all understanding. But ...
A. 31 July 2008: Hi everyone!!!
well I think anyone who thinks they can accurately predict human behaviour is at best kidding themselves , at worst delusional.
Seriously, the greatest thinkers and intellects throughout history have attempted and failed to pr... (read in full...)
Who wants to marry someone when you can't trust what they say?
Q. I have posted several times before about my relationship but just when I thought the mass confusion was over..... Basically we have been together for 7 years and have a 4 1/2 month old son together. He can't hold a job so we all live with my par...
A. 20 July 2008: Hi,
the worrying thing for me is you have said you have posted several times before. I cant recall these but I can guess they would have to do about how this man treats you like dirt. Yet you still write in asking whether you should be mad at him?... (read in full...)
Is it really possible to have an anal orgasm?
Q. recently I have been exploring my butt and and had been liking it. I was wondering of anyone had any good ways to get max pleasure, and is it really possibleto have an anal orgasim....
A. 20 July 2008: Geez, things sure are different from my day as a teenager.
An anal orgasm? holy cow.. sounds absolutely horrid.
But different strokes for different folks i guess, you are only 13-15 mate, how about simple masturbation for a start like the rest of ... (read in full...)
He told me to leave him alone and stay away. I haven't heard a word for a week. Should I wait?
Q. don't know what to do here. the man i've been sleeping with for four years jusy recently cursed me out like a dog for coming down to his told me to leave him alone and to stay away from him. i in turn sent him a letter saying i was sorry for making ...
A. 20 July 2008: Oh dear,
you sound like you have absolutely no self confidence, why on earth did you go crawling back to him.
You have to pick yourself up and realise that if a man abuses you after he cheats on you he is a scumbag not worthy of your love. The soon... (read in full...)
Do guys REALLY want skinny girls?
Q. ok heres my question do guys really want really skinny gf's???? i know its talked about all the time but nobody ever asks real everyday men! i'm 14/16 is that too big? is that normal? what do you guys think of women and their bodies...
A. 20 July 2008: Only the most superficial guys tend to like skinny girls. Personally myself and every guy I know likes girls with some flesh on their bones... so don't worry, you are not too big you sound just right.
Guys like girls who are confident about thei... (read in full...)
What's the best way to leave my rageful husband?
Q. i am 24 and have been married for almost 5 years. things were wonderful for the 5 months before the wedding, but afterward, everything went to chaos. he goes through these frequent periods of what i can only assume to be depression (sinc...
A. 20 July 2008: Hi there,
yes, take the advice of the other posters. Get out now, or at the very least start making plans right now so you can leave at the drop of the hat.
You are in danger and he may end up hurting you or worse.
Personally, I think you really n... (read in full...)
My b/f doesn't understand why I'm feeling uncomfortable about how our schedule is affecting our relatonship!
Q. Ever since I took a fulltime job I feel out of sync with my b/f and it's causing problems. We used to both get off around 4:00 PM every day and do things together. Now I don't get home until 5:30 or 5:45 and he's been getting off at 2:00 PM. I ...
A. 19 July 2008: My dear,
do not abuse posters who are only trying to offer advice on the information you have given. You only reaffirm their opinion that you are obsessive and demanding.
In MY opinion that is exactly what you are, most people arrive home at diffe... (read in full...)
Why are women expected to degrade themselves for men's pleasure, but not vice versa?
Q. I do not understand why it is almost expected of women to degrade themselves to please men when men won't do the same for us. Men's minds are so poisoned by the porn industry that they think it is NORMAL for women to take it in the ass and so on. I ...
A. 18 July 2008: Hi,
you have free will, you can say no and find another boyfriend, one who doesnt want to degrade you.
It really is as simple as that.
The porn industry is not to blame....sorry,but you can make your own decisions without passing on the b... (read in full...)
My wife told me she would cheat on me with George Clooney if she had the chance!!!
Q. Guys, would it bother you a lot if this happened to you? My wife and I were watching tv last night where a woman was asked a question, if George Clooney asked her to have sex with her and there was no way she could get caught would she cheat on her ...
A. 14 July 2008: Seriously brother, you need to get out more.
George Clooney!!, what girl wouldnt?
good grief.... (read in full...)
Quiz on guys!
Q. I have couple of fun questions on you GUYS !!! 1. Why do guys loose intrest in kissing after couple of months of dating? It seems to me, that first you are all into it, beeing kissed and such, and than, you just loose intrested and its more lik...
A. 14 July 2008: I think you are the one without a sense of humour my dear.
Don't ask the questions then.. how's that for some new advice.... (read in full...)
What do I do about my posessive boyfriend?
Q. I have this problem... the thing is I really care about my boyfriend... but he's can be a little possesive... He doesn't like me being around my friends because he says I act different around them, basically I don't smother him with affecti...
A. 14 July 2008: Hi,
You're 16-17?? good grief, dump him! Move on . you'll find someone else special( though he is nothing special believe me) real soon. Life is way too short to be hanging around with possessive controlling arseholes mate.
And that is what he ... (read in full...)
Cheap boyfriend who won't share - should I just move on to someone who doesn't put money first?
Q. I am 46 and broke, my previous husband took me to the cleaners, I became homeless and had to live with another family for 6 months until I got on my feet. I have now managed to do this and have met a man who is wealthy. He won't pay for meals when ...
A. 13 July 2008: Hi,
yep, lose this one mate. He is a tight fisted a-hole.
He can sit alone at home at throw his money in piles all around him in the future.
good luck...send him an itemised bill for the meals.
... (read in full...)
Quiz on guys!
Q. I have couple of fun questions on you GUYS !!! 1. Why do guys loose intrest in kissing after couple of months of dating? It seems to me, that first you are all into it, beeing kissed and such, and than, you just loose intrested and its more lik...
A. 12 July 2008: Hi,
I have a very simple answer for you.
Change the type of men you date. You are going out with insecure little boys who probably make themselves out to be rough tough blokes but are in reality nothing but.
I have never cared how many partner... (read in full...)
My girlfriend is very experienced, I am a virgin, I don't want to let this get in the way but I can't stop thinking about the number of times she's done it! help!
Q. Ok well unfortuantly I don't exactly have the most self-confidence and well i'm often subject to be jealous of one of my gf's ex's they did it about 35 times while they were together over about 8 months or something like that (I know unfortunately ...
A. 12 July 2008: Hi mate,
normally I get very angry when guys start obsessing over their girlfriends past, as it is none of their business.
But you are a little different you at least know that it is wrong and you are sensitive to her needs.
So believe me champ... (read in full...)
We're ready to have sex, I'm not sure what to do, and I'm worried about my penis? help me!
Q. Ok then this is really wierd for me to be putting this here but it feels like I need answers for my question than other peoples. Ok so I am quite literary really scared of sex i've never done it before, I have a gf and i'm 18 and she's 17 and she...
A. 12 July 2008: O.K. dude, from one uncircumsized guy to another.
The foreskin generally doesnt retract until the head of your penis is well lubricated.
Try this, get some lubricant ( like KY Jelly )and apply it to the tip of your penis. Then slowly "pull down t... (read in full...)
The Understanding Male Species...or not?
Q. After reading several of the replies submitted by Agony Uncles here on Dear Cupid, I have come to realise, or should I say, believe, that the majority of them are really very sympathetic, kind, loving, caring ~ but most of all understanding. But ...
A. 5 July 2008: Were they happy with such a small payout??... (read in full...)
The Understanding Male Species...or not?
Q. After reading several of the replies submitted by Agony Uncles here on Dear Cupid, I have come to realise, or should I say, believe, that the majority of them are really very sympathetic, kind, loving, caring ~ but most of all understanding. But ...
A. 3 July 2008: I must be reading a different article from everyone else.
The way I read it, Big Sis is merely stating that she has picked the wrong type of men in her past ( and she admits it ) and now she aint gonna take that shit no more. And everyone... (read in full...)
The Understanding Male Species...or not?
Q. After reading several of the replies submitted by Agony Uncles here on Dear Cupid, I have come to realise, or should I say, believe, that the majority of them are really very sympathetic, kind, loving, caring ~ but most of all understanding. But ...
A. 3 July 2008:
Twist of fate, me old matey what can I say, you just keep providing further examples of primeval behaviour, prey tell does your long suffering wife have to shave your back regularly to keep people from throwing bananas at you?... (read in full...)
The Understanding Male Species...or not?
Q. After reading several of the replies submitted by Agony Uncles here on Dear Cupid, I have come to realise, or should I say, believe, that the majority of them are really very sympathetic, kind, loving, caring ~ but most of all understanding. But ...
A. 2 July 2008: Twist of fate... mate you are living proof of why ikind considerate women like Big Sis have to write these type of articles.
I just hope you're single mate.... (read in full...)
The Understanding Male Species...or not?
Q. After reading several of the replies submitted by Agony Uncles here on Dear Cupid, I have come to realise, or should I say, believe, that the majority of them are really very sympathetic, kind, loving, caring ~ but most of all understanding. But ...
A. 1 July 2008: All I can say Big Sis is they were fools to treat a classy act like yourself this way.
So a big thumbs down to those deadbeats and a big thumbs up to Big Sis - you're the best baby!... (read in full...)
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