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... Send *d206 a private message | | | *d206's profile:Hi, my name is Cat and I'm 22 years old. I live in various cities in the UK since the city where I study and where my family live are different. I'm currently just out of a relationship and enjoying the single life for a while. I don't know that I am qualified to help people but I'd like to try. I've had a lot of experiences in my life and despite being quite young I'm always helping my friends with their problems. I'd like the chance to help all of you too. Feel free to private message me anytime.If you do however, please include some details of your problem as I answer a lot here and can't always remember specific problems. With big hugs, Cat xx |
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Does he have feelings for me or is he like this with all other women?
Q. Hello! Somebody please help me. I started work here a year ago and I've got to know a guy really well... lets call him J. We've spent a lot of time together, lunch breaks, nights out at weekends, etc etc. He says i mean the world to him, th...
A. 16 May 2007: Well is he like that with other women? I'm sure you've seen him with other women if you've known him for a year. Of course the easiest course of action is just to ask him out. Who cares if he says no? There's a couple of seconds of awkwardness and ... (read in full...)
Should i be right to think that this is maybe an easy way out as surely she could of said on the phone rather than letting me believe we were still meeting up.
Q. Hi, ive recently met a girl (19) and im (21). On our first date we just clicked and we didnt look back. There was something about her we would just lay there staring into each others eyes whilst exchanging the occasional smooch. Normally i would of ...
A. 16 May 2007: You know what? I feel the same as her. I read your opening paragraph and then read two weeks and gasped. She's not dumping you, she's just worried you're going to talk her out of taking things slow. Write her an email and tell her you agree that ... (read in full...)
My husband told me that he wants a penis enlargement
Q. My husband told me that he wants a penis enlargement. He said it will make our sex life hotter and better - even though our sex life, is, on the whole - reasonably good. I'd never have a breast enlargement because it'd mean I'd have to buy expe...
A. 16 May 2007: Ultimately it's his body and it's up to him what he does with it although I understand you being concerned that your opinion doesn't count. Support him, tell him it's not necessary etc and research any risks on the internet so that you're aware of ... (read in full...)
I can't help but feel that there was someone else
Q. Hi, i have recently moved back in with my husband after he decided after 7 months of marriage he did not want to be committed and was not sure what he wanted. After giving him this time he wanted me back, he said he is sure he will not do this ...
A. 16 May 2007: My first thought is that he wouldn't have asked you to come back if he was seeing someone else.
My second is that you deserve to feel hurt and betrayed and all those other things when you think of him.
My third is that you really need to d... (read in full...)
People are telling me to get rid of him but i just cant...
Q. People are telling me to get rid of him but i just cant... i say to my self im not going to speak 2 him,,, or see him but i cant control my slef, i like him so much im so young and foolish but i cannt stop my self and the way i feel, im such a silly ...
A. 16 May 2007: Okay, this will sound harsh but think about it and you'll know it's true. It's not that you can't get rid of him, it's that you don't want to. There's nothing physical holding you back from telling him to get lost and then sticking to your guns but ... (read in full...)
He said he's not ready to get involved but has asked me over to stay tomorrow night but I'm scared to because of the way I feel about him...
Q. hi guys, i'm a bit worried. I was seeing this guy for about 2 months, but he wasn't ready to get into a relationship so it never worked out. Since then it hasn't been awkward, and we've became really good friends. Though i get the impressio...
A. 16 May 2007: It's possible tht he's relaxed at the thought of you staying over but my instinct when reading your post is that he will use your vulnerability with liking him and needing a place to stay to force you into doing things you don't want to do outside ... (read in full...)
I don't want him to just "use me" as he has done this before in past relationships.
Q. I really like this guy, i used 2 go out with him but we broke up because he didnt treat me very well, and if i go out with him my friends will go against me because they all hate him and think i do as well. i think he likes me a little bit more than ...
A. 16 May 2007: Friends will last infinitely longer than boyfriends, especially at your age. There doesn't seem to be any reasons in favour of going out with him except your attraction to him. I'm sure if you give yourself a chance you will be attracted to other ... (read in full...)
I need some help as I've fallen for a man who is married with children
Q. I need some help as I've fallen for a man who is married with children I see him once a week usually I am a client of where he works. We've known each other for about two years on and off. I keep thinking of him and I saw him the other day When I ...
A. 16 May 2007: If you've just come out of a relationship it strikes me that this man is probably your rebound guy. Perhaps he represents everything you want? A stable relationship with kids etc... I know how hard unrequited love, even rebound love can be to get ... (read in full...)
What can I do to earn some money???
Q. i want to buy new clothes because my wardrobe isnt up to date, and im not a snobby person, i just like to look pretty. but i never have any money! and i dont no how to earn it. i cant work because i go to saturday school and on a sunday i do cors...
A. 16 May 2007: Probably nobody would employ you anyway because you need to have a national insurance number to get any job that doesn't pay cash in hand. Why not shop for clothes in charity shops? It's not all old lady clothes... or see if there are things you can ... (read in full...)
Is he over her or hanging on? Is he still thinking about her?
Q. My boyfriend and I started dating about eight months ago. He ended a 4-year relationship last spring. He moved to our area about 3-4 months after ending his last relationship, but last week when I was looking for a paper in his desk, I came across ...
A. 15 May 2007: Don't you keep pictures of you and your exes? I know I do, even though I haven't thought about most of them in ages before I answered your post. I really wouldn't worry about this. It's natural to feel insecure about those who have gone before us ... (read in full...)
Is a month too soon into a relationship to start having sex?
Q. Im a 25 year old virgin who has recently started seeing a guy. he is coming to my town on saturday night and has asked me to stay in a hotel with him. can i read into this as him expecting sex? ive been seeing him for a month, i trust him but being ...
A. 15 May 2007: It all depends on your perceptions and morals. As a virgin I would be especially careful about giving yourself after a month. Although most people regret their first time it seems that after waiting so long that you deserve a great first time. If ... (read in full...)
How can I get her to want me again, sexually?
Q. is she making a fool out of me? why wont she cater to me anymore? i cater to her now and i spoil her, but i cant even get any sexual attention from her. she wont even make out with me anymore. she used to love sex, she used to be almost as horny as ...
A. 15 May 2007: Find out what's causing the problem by talking to her but don't take the direction woe is me because there might be something she can't communicate to you and she needs your acceptance and understanding of whatever her issue is. Nobody here can tell ... (read in full...)
His Mother found out my age and told her son to dump me! What can I do?
Q. hi, ive got a big problem with my bf. Me and my bf have 3 years difference (i am 13 he is 16) we have already talked about sex and made sure we have eachothers trust neither of us are going to take advantage. But his mum has found out my age and h...
A. 15 May 2007: Okay, this is why I think his mum is upset about the two of you dating. He's scared that you're going to have sex, which at your age is illegal and possibly also scared that you're going to end up pregnant. Your boyfriend needs to talk to his mum ... (read in full...)
Whenever I move on, this guy turns up to hurt me again. What can I do to get on with my life?
Q. Nearly for two years I have been trying to move on from this guy. When I was dating him, he messed me about so I moved on with my life. Last year he contacted me and explained when he was seeing me he was trying to get over his ex and he ...
A. 15 May 2007: I think you have to date other people. Do you think someone who really loved you would treat you badly, not be able to scrape together a train fare, put you through emotional hell when you were doing your finals and date other girls in the meantime? ... (read in full...)
She got pregnant with another man, we're about to sell the house, I don't know if I can forgive her. Should I get back together with her?
Q. I have lived with my partner for twelve years but the last 18 months the relationship has deteriorated and we decided to split.We put the house up for sale but continued to live under the same roof in separate bedrooms.My partner has now hit me with ...
A. 15 May 2007: Well if you can't forgive her what kind of relationship will it be? A relationship needs trust and honest to survive. Do you think you can get that back?
Think carefully about telling the wife. My guess is that you only want to do it to make you... (read in full...)
How do I explain to my boyfriend that if I keep the baby he will need to help out as well?
Q. Im 17 years old and have just recently found out i was pregnant, my boyfriend knows of this but he keeps asking what i m going to do, but i dont want to do this alone, he says he'll stick by me whatever i do, but i need his help, how can i make him ...
A. 15 May 2007: Have you tried just straight out telling him? He sounds like a good and noble boyfriend to stand by you whatever happens but do be aware that a lot of people say that and then disappear. Ultimately if you choose to have this baby you need to deal ... (read in full...)
Was he attracted to me, or what is just the alcohol ?
Q. Heres my story. Only lately I have accepted that I might be gay. I have liked a guy younger than me for the past few years. He is 15, and I am 18. One night he stayed at my house and we got rather drunk. We sat together like old mates, ...
A. 15 May 2007: Hiya, just a quick comment about one of yours. You're right that 15 year old girls often go out with older men but I think the difference here is that as a young gay man, he's perhaps a little more vulnerable than a girl. Is he sure that he's gay? I ... (read in full...)
Friend problems! Should I ditch my so called old friends and be a loner at school or carry on being un-happy?
Q. I have a problem with my group of 'close nit' friends. We have been friends since first school we are now in year 10 at high school and its going really bad - i feel so upset about it all! Firstly i chose different lessons to all my friends ...
A. 15 May 2007: I think it would be a shame to lose friends that you've had for such a long time,especially since as you said you find it difficult to make friends. Girls will be bitches and especially at your age it's a hard habit to break. This would be my ... (read in full...)
She was assualted and her fiancee won't allow her to go out, anywhere! How can I convince her to?
Q. Hi I have a friend who was sexually assaulted about 1 month ago and she says that she thinks she is ready to go out and face the world again only the problem is, she is in a relationship and her fiancee doesnt want her to go out anymore. She said ...
A. 15 May 2007: I'm with you, I don't think her fiance should have this degre of power over her either but the awful thing is that neither your or my opinion counts here. She needs to see that he's crowding her for herself and find a way to stick up for herself ... (read in full...)
I am offering her a life of happiness but she still stays tied to her abusive ex because of their kid!
Q. Hi. I know this woman wants me and she's said that I'm the best man she's ever met. Yet, she has a child from a previous relationship and her ex has started making more demands of her time, expecting her to take the kid to and from him for visits. ...
A. 15 May 2007: She's made the decision because it agrees with her principles and morals. In some ways I am with her. I would always advise someone to work extra hard at their relationship for the sake of their child. So many couples just think about themselves and ... (read in full...)
I'm blonde--he's brunette..will our children have 'ginger' hair?
Q. if i am blonde haired and my boyfriend is brown haired does this mean our children have a good chance of having ginger hair?...
A. 14 May 2007: Possibly, but not because you're mixing blonde and dark hair. For your child to be ginger they have to get one ginger gene off you and one off their dad. Hair colour genes run in pairs so if each of you has one ginger in that pair then it's ... (read in full...)
She told me she had fallen for me, I needed time to think it through, but now she is seeing someone else! I am so hurt!
Q. ok a friend told me she had fallen for me but i wasnt sure how i felt so i said i needed time to sort out my feelings because i wasnt sure. She said she would always like me and would wait. However, ive just found out that shes seeing someone else. ...
A. 14 May 2007: I guess it depends on the timing involved. I can't believe you would actually think it's ok to make her hold on indefinitely for you if you took more than a month to make a decision about how you felt. After all, if you thought there was no chance ... (read in full...)
I'm 13 and have an embarrasing problem of excessively sweaty hands! What can I do?
Q. Dear Cupid, I am only 13 but have a real problem with sweaty hands! It is really embarrasing becuase i feel like i can never dance with anyone at partys or hold hands when dancing (one of my favourtie hobbies!) i really dont want surgical...
A. 14 May 2007: I think everyone suffers from sweaty palms, it's a common side effect of nerves and I'm guessing at your age that dancing with a guy and holding hands makes you nervous, hell it even makes me nervous if I like te guy enough. Unfortunately I don't ... (read in full...)
I am in love with a friend I know has a girlfriend and we have fooled around a few times to the point of almost going too far.
Q. I am in love with a friend I know has a girlfriend and we have fooled around a few times to the point of almost going too far. I also have a boyfriend but have not been happy in the relationship for a while. Im confused because i know this guy likes ...
A. 14 May 2007: Going anywhere is going too far when you're both with people. I have to ask why you're still with your current boyfriend if you haven't been happy for a while. Is it that it's better to be with someone than alone? If so can you see how that hampers ... (read in full...)
I lack confidence and I am so paranoid in public that I feel sick. How do I overcome this?
Q. I lack confidence , i cannot be myself around my boyfriend or anyone else, i struggle to talk to people , he knows the situation and tries to help, so many people say they fancy me but i can't see what they see in me , i am so paranoid in public and ...
A. 14 May 2007: There's no magical answer where one day you will wake up and be the most confident person in the planet. The way I would deal with this is to make a list of things that scare you about being in public, be it speaking to one person, group speaking, ... (read in full...)
I am not cool with my bf having a stag with strippers! Am I strange for thinking this way?
Q. just wondering, when you get married to a lad and they go for a stag do, do they have to go to a stripper, cos when i get engaged i really aint cool wiv my boyfriend seein a stripper? i mean if his mates prepared it id like him to say no and go ...
A. 14 May 2007: First thing, I think you have a while before you have to worry about this. Secondly I don't think you should be marrying anyone unless you can categorically trust them to see a stripper without sleeping with her. Thirdly I think the trust has to be ... (read in full...)
Is it okay for me to go out with a younger guy?
Q. Hi im a eighteen year old college student, ive had these feelings for a boy who is 3 years younger than i am, ive tried to stop them but i just cant, the attraction is soo intense, i dont usually go for guys younger than me so i just dont understnd ...
A. 13 May 2007: I guess it depends on how much you like him. You're right that double standards are unfair but they exist unfortunately, so you need to decide whether you can cope with being branded a child molester/cradle snatcher etc, his parents and yours ... (read in full...)
Now that I've kissed him, how do I catch his interest?
Q. I kissed a guy at a party a couple weeks ago and we have talk quite a bit since then but it is just and I am asking what I should do to start something up with him, because I really like him?...
A. 13 May 2007: Ask him if he'd like to come out with you and some friends to the cinema/bowling etc and go on a group outing. At the end of the night tell him you've had a great time and would be nice to do it again sometime, just the two of you. Then the ball is ... (read in full...)
How do I get him to trust me?
Q. new guy finding it hard to trust me. I've met this new guy he's great i like him a lot but people have been telling him bad things about me and he is having a hard time trusting me how do I get him to start trusting me?...
A. 13 May 2007: Prove to him that the stuff people have been saying about you isn't true. Or if it is true admit to your mistakes and promise they won't happen again.
CD... (read in full...)
I love him but he keeps letting his gf make a fool out of him. What can I do?
Q. I have two friends, I'll call them Jack and Sarah. We're best friends and its always just been us three since we started high school. This year they started dating in January. Jack was completely in love with Sarah but Sarah never really liked him. ...
A. 13 May 2007: Sounds like Jack has decided to forgive Sarah. Although you told him what was happening with the best of intentions I strongly advise not doing stuff like this again. He could easily have told her what you'd said and she could've denied it and said ... (read in full...)
how do i get over my best friends boyfriend
Q. how do i get over my best friends boyfriend? this guy is amazing, he has told me he has though about us but he loves my best friend too much, he doesn't know i like him but I'm sure he suspects it. my parents want me to go out with him but cons...
A. 13 May 2007: Watch how happy he makes your friend and how happy she makes him. Do you really want to be the cause of wrecking that? Find another guy, any guy and ask him out on a date. Maybe it won't work out but doing your best to get out there will help get ... (read in full...)
My friend is 14 and has slept with guys aged 13 to 30... how can I get her to stop!?
Q. im realli worried about my friend!!! she is 14 and she has slept with loads and loads of guys, all ages too. she is sleeping around ti make her self popular and i cant get it through to her that thats all they r after, she thinks havin sex with loa...
A. 13 May 2007: I don't think you can stop her from having sex if thats what she wants to do. The best possible thing you could do is advise her to get tested for Chlamydia which can cause infertility and various other problems and while she is being tested get ... (read in full...)
He treats me like a sister...should I risk asking him out even if it things won't be the same, should he say no?
Q. Ok, so i really really like this guy. We've known each other for around 6-7 years from school but we only started talking 2 months ago. We're both 14 and we're already SO close its unbelievable, i started developing feelings for him in the first...
A. 13 May 2007: Yeah, normally I would advise people to tell the other person how they feel and take a risk to be happy but at fourteen I'm not sure this guy is mature enough not to let it affect your friendship. Also, he seems to have made it pretty clear that he ... (read in full...)
She doesn't like me sucking her nipples because her breasts are sore. Could she be pregnant?
Q. When I'm having sex with my girl I love sucking her nipples, but lately she's been saying she doesn't want me to do that to her because I'm acting like a child feeding off of her and she has said that her breasts are sore. Is this normal for a girl. ...
A. 13 May 2007: Girls breasts get sore when theyre pregnant, when theyre on their period or just randomly. I think if she was pregnant she might think to mention it to you.
CD... (read in full...)
We were engaged 3 years ago and there's still no sign of us setting the big date to get married yet!
Q. We got engaged when we were both 20, now it is 3 years later. We have lived together for a long time, and he says that we agreed marry few years later. Well, it is now 3yrs on going, and no sign of marriage yet. I love him, and treat him as if he ...
A. 12 May 2007: I think he definitely loves you, he's just unsure about marriage aged 23. It is very young by anyone's standards. Sit down and talk to him properly. Tell him that it doesn't have to be next month but you would like to know if he envisages you as ... (read in full...)
What is she feeling about our friendship?
Q. What is she feeling about our friendship? I have a problem with a really sweet girl at work. She's been working there for a while and we've known each other in the work place. Earlier this year we started to get on really well. She then off...
A. 12 May 2007: Okay first thing you need to do is get yourself into a position where you're totally over her and want to be her friend and nothing else, even if she offered you everything on a platter. Then you need to get her to meet you, even if only five ... (read in full...)
What drives a person to have a romantic relationship with someone who is married?
Q. What drives a person to have a romantic relationship with someone who is married? I pose this big question because I want to raise my daughter so that she is not predisposed to cheapen herself through an affair with someone who is married. On t...
A. 12 May 2007: Okay, so I've never had an affair but I thought I would give you an opinion anyway which is that people who cheat with married men do so for two reasons that can exist together but only just. One is that they think they are so special that they ... (read in full...)
I would love to have children one day but my boyfriend has other ideas!
Q. My boyfriend and I met a year ago. We went on a few dates and I realised I had fallen for him, but after a couple of weeks he told me he had decided to move to Italy (from Spain) for 6 months. We stayed in touch, and he came back after less than 2 ...
A. 12 May 2007: Yes and no..... I believe you do deserve to know where you stand about kids etc but you are still young. It might have been your idea all along that if you have kids you'd like to have them young but if your boyfriend had the same idea about having ... (read in full...)
I was never the only female (yes sexual) friend in his life.
Q. I have been friends with a guy for 4 yrs. During this friendship I was never the only female (yes sexual) friend in his life. Although i accepted it i never liked it and i have never told him this - i have put up with it i guess because no one ...
A. 12 May 2007: Are you absolutely convinced that he doesn't like this girl or is that you want it to be true so badly that you're seeing something that may not even be there? In every relationship people have choices. Nobody is holding a gun to his head to make ... (read in full...)
Who should I choose, my husband or my mate?
Q. Recently I found out that my husband of twelve years has had an affair with my brother's wife for just over a year. My brother and i were devastated by the news and trying to work through our marriages. Problem is that only a couple of days ago ...
A. 12 May 2007: What your husband did to you was inexcusable and I'm not saying forgiving him would be the easiest thing to do but marriage is hard. If it was easy there would be no point in doing it and I think you owe it to yourself to have another go. Your mate ... (read in full...)
I know this is a silly question... but should I break up with him?
Q. should i break up with him ? first,i don't trust him like i used to.secound,i don't feel that he actually understands me like he used. third, we fight alot. fourth, i don't feel that he listens to me .fifth, i don't feel that he cares about me !!!ya ...
A. 12 May 2007: There will always be regrets whether you break up on good or bad terms with someone. Life will be rubbish for a little while after breakig up and it will make you wonder whether you did the right thing, but if you know in your heart of hearts that ... (read in full...)
Was he attracted to me, or what is just the alcohol ?
Q. Heres my story. Only lately I have accepted that I might be gay. I have liked a guy younger than me for the past few years. He is 15, and I am 18. One night he stayed at my house and we got rather drunk. We sat together like old mates, ...
A. 20 April 2007: "It is her nature to tell people her problems..." Newsflash, it's not her problem. This is totally your issue and whether you're gay or straight or asexual she's your mother and she should try to accept it. Seems like she's forgotten that along the ... (read in full...)
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