I'm married, will be a father in a month, but can't control my feelings for the receptionist at the gym.
Q. Hi Everyone, I am a new member on this site. I am married now for 8 months almost and we will have a baby soon. We dated for only around 1.5 years before we decided to get married. I go to this gym everyday and have started liking a girl at th...
A. 18 March 2010: Okay, you have to get a grip. She's friendly because it's her job to be friendly. Talking about her family and siblings is not "personal" information, it's small-talk. It's okay to have a crush, but you need to keep yourself firmly rooted in ... (read in full...)
Completely Lost...
Q. 5 1/2 years ago, I met a woman. At the time I was married for 10 years, with two children. I thought I had a happy marriage, but since then, I'm not sure. My new relationship started off harmless, she was married too. As time went on, things b...
A. 13 March 2010: The right medication won't leave you numb, but will stabilize your mood enough for you to be able to really get something out of your counseling. More importantly, you'll be able make a decision about your marriage with a clear mind, not a depressed ... (read in full...)
Completely Lost...
Q. 5 1/2 years ago, I met a woman. At the time I was married for 10 years, with two children. I thought I had a happy marriage, but since then, I'm not sure. My new relationship started off harmless, she was married too. As time went on, things b...
A. 12 March 2010: The feelings WILL go away with time. You haven't said how long it's been since you ended your contact with this woman, and forgetting someone is not going to happen overnight. You might want to ask your counselor about antidepressants to help deal ... (read in full...)
Should I try to make it work with my husband or should I finally leave and start a new life?
Q. I've been married for 4 years, and I have a 3 yr old son with my husband. He is a great, amazing, cute, hardworking man. About a year and half ago i started seeing this other guy, started off as a little adventure, but became very serious, and now ...
A. 12 March 2010: I think you got married too soon. I'm not saying this as an insult, but you are not mature enough to be in a stable, monogamous relationship; you started cheating 2.5 yrs into your marriage. You still want to go out and have fun, which is ... (read in full...)
He had an affair with me but now is putting the blame on me that they are getting divorced.
Q. I've been trying to find ways to get over the hurt I've just experienced. I found this website and read one woman's question and her experience sounded exactly like mine. I recently was invovled with a married man for 4 months. Last night our ...
A. 12 March 2010: A man who cheats is automatically a liar. He definitely saw your weakness and took advantage of it. You have every right to be angry, but he WILL pay for his actions, even if you never see it.
You will find the strength to move on because ... (read in full...)
My relationship just ended but I don't care..?
Q. My relationship of 2 months just ended about an hour ago. For some reason I am not at all upset. I don't know what to make of this. I was trying to make it work up until he decided it just wouldn't, but it was more because I was scared of being ...
A. 11 March 2010: You're not upset because you are starting to realize that being alone is better than being with someone who frustrates and that you don't even like as a person.
You're growing up. ... (read in full...)
How do I go about telling her I'm sorry for everything and I'm getting help?
Q. Hi I could do with some advice. I had an anger episode a couple of weeks ago towards my fiancé it was just verbal not physical and I'm not trying to justify my actions and I regret them everyday, I have seen my GP and we are in agreance that I ...
A. 10 March 2010: Could you write a letter expressing what you just said here and give it to your solicitor to pass along? Does she know that you have been diagnosed with bi-polar disorder? Make sure you tell her exactly what you are doing to change (seeing a ... (read in full...)
Completely Lost...
Q. 5 1/2 years ago, I met a woman. At the time I was married for 10 years, with two children. I thought I had a happy marriage, but since then, I'm not sure. My new relationship started off harmless, she was married too. As time went on, things b...
A. 10 March 2010: Just because you can't get this woman out of your mind is not a sign that you are supposed to be with her or that she is the one--or even that you would be happier if you were with her. You miss her, as you would miss anyone who was a part of your ... (read in full...)
I'm over the fact that she left me, but not the resentment.
Q. To cut a long story short, my partner who I loved very much left me for another guy. This was 3 months ago. I have gotten over the jealousy and the feeling of sickness when I think about 'them' but I can't seem to shift the anger. I've tried to tell ...
A. 10 March 2010: Your anger is not irrational and you are entitled to feel the way you do. Three months is really not a long time to grieve the loss of your relationship and your partner's betrayal, so don't feel like you should have gotten over it by now. ... (read in full...)
Completely Lost...
Q. 5 1/2 years ago, I met a woman. At the time I was married for 10 years, with two children. I thought I had a happy marriage, but since then, I'm not sure. My new relationship started off harmless, she was married too. As time went on, things b...
A. 10 March 2010: Are you on the verge of a breakdown because you are in a miserable marriage? I ask this because nothing in your post suggests that your marriage is insufferable, it's just not what you want it to be. Could this be because you have spent nearly half ... (read in full...)
"Brace" yourself!!!
Q. I am 27 and have horrible upper teeth, I have just seen an orthodontist who has said I need a fixed brace for 12-18 months, I have always felt awkward about my teeth and want them straight but I am constantly worried what people think of me and ...
A. 10 March 2010: The same guys who wouldn't be interested in a girl with braces probably wouldn't want to date a girl with crooked teeth, either, so you their opinion really doesn't matter.
I am 37 and have worn braces for nearly 3 years and I don't regret i... (read in full...)
Shaven or not?
Q. A simple question to ask, for both males and females if you please: Shaven pubic region or unshaven pubic region? I myself find shaven definitely more preferable, and don't say you like both, because you are bound to like one at least sligh...
A. 6 March 2010: Neat, but not clean-shaven.... (read in full...)
My mom and dad want to use my credit and then have me go bankrupt, any way I can stop them?
Q. So I have sort of a financial problem... Apparently my dad and mom want to work up my credit then have me go bankrupt I have no specicfic reasons why so dey want to ... But I have no control and if I say no they stop talking to me... Why would I ...
A. 4 March 2010: You DO have control. They have no right to expect you to allow them to ruin your credit; YOU will be the one dealing with collection agents and possibly court judgments. Also, it's not as easy to file bankruptcy as it used to be,and if a judge ... (read in full...)
Should I stop being friends with her? If so, how?
Q. So I have this friend that I've known for about 7 years. We went to the same highschool, and now we're in college together. We had a falling out a few years ago, because I couldn't stand her lying to everyone, gossiping, and using people anymore. I...
A. 3 March 2010: I don't think you necessarily need to end the friendship, you just have to figure out how to "manage" this girl. You have to counter her behavior by being less accommodating; she is taking advantage of you and you have to start saying "no" to her. ... (read in full...)
She says the baby is not mine, but I am worried she is lying
Q. on Dec 02, 2009 I ejaculated on a females stomach. I went into the bathroom to get a towel and left the room for a few minutes. I received a call today 03/02/10 from this girl stating she is pregnant and is due on july 9,2010. my question is--is it ...
A. 3 March 2010: If the baby is due July 9,2010, according to the BabyMed conception calendar: Your estimated conception date was between Sunday, October 11, 2009 and Saturday, October 17, 2009.... (read in full...)
Insentive girlfriend and I don't know what to do.
Q. For 18 months i have been in a relationship. I knew she had seen a married man long before we met. I never thought much as mistakes do happen. Yesterday we were talking in bed. Its now she tells me that i`m the only single guy she was interested in. ...
A. 25 February 2010: By her behavior, she's just told you everything you need to know to understand what kind of person she truly is:
1.She's vindictive, has no conscience, is insanely jealous and potentially violent.
2. She gets off on destroying people's liv... (read in full...)
Why are these people angry at me and not him?
Q. So I hooked up with a guy my friend had a crush on. She walked in on us when my pants were down. I told her I was sorry and that I didn't mean to hurt her. she didn't talk to me for a week but she finally started talking to me again and were trying ...
A. 22 February 2010: They're angry at you because you were HER friend and they held you to a higher standard. They are still cool with the guy because he is immaterial; they know that he is a jerk and not worth dating, but they respected their friend's interest in him ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend is getting annoyed with my sad and lonely behaviour, but I just cant feel happy after I found out he cheated on me...
Q. i had a relationship of 3 yrs but my boyfriend cheated me and confess his mistake that he had many relationship and i dont have any hint, but due to some personal issue i forgive his all mistakes. i gave him another chance but i am not happy but he ...
A. 22 February 2010: You can't be happy because you are still hurting. He cannot expect everything to go back to normal and for you to act as though nothing happened. He has no right to get annoyed with you; he messed things up,it will be a while before you trust him ... (read in full...)
My work colleague has left his wife for me. Should I get involved?
Q. I have been working at my work place for 11 months. It became obvious 6 months ago that one of my married work colleagues had developed feelings for me. He constantly hung around my office area during his lunch. I steadfastly ignored him. Even some ...
A. 22 February 2010: I applaud you for not getting involved with this guy just yet. However, I can't imagine anyone leaving an unhealthy relationship and successfully moving into a successful one without taking some downtime to recover and reflect. Clearly his marriage ... (read in full...)
Why do I still care about how I make him feel after he has continually cheated?
Q. . There are times when I feel like my chest is caving in and I can’t even breathe. I wake up every day now with a fake smile so that my girls won’t see the pain and hurt that I am dealing with. I am more confused now than I have ever been in this ...
A. 19 February 2010: You still care about how he feels because you haven't figured out that your well-being is just as important as his. You make him priority, while he makes you an afterthought. The problem is that you've been so emotionally beaten down by this dog of ... (read in full...)
What does he really mean when he says that he values our friendship too much to be in a relationship?
Q. Why would a guy want to keep you as their best friend, so they do not ruin what they have with you? Is it that they just do not want to have a relationship with you, or that they are not ready or, that they value you too much to lose you from the...
A. 18 February 2010: He likes you as a person and a friend, but doesn't see you as a girlfriend.... (read in full...)
I hate my surname! Is there any solution to this?
Q. I know this problem is lighthearted compared to some of the other stuff people are going through, but it's been bugging me for a long time. I can accpet an honest answer but please don't judge me as shallow. I love my family, but I absolutely hat...
A. 17 February 2010: If you feel so strongly about this, you should apply for a legal name change.
A solution to your problem may be to have two surnames. This is which is common in some Hispanic cultures: one name represents your father's surname and in your case, on... (read in full...)
Does the hurt and pain EVER go away or at least ease?
Q. It's me again, Well we went out for valentines dinner on Saturday night and it had to happen. I mentioned I suppose I'd be getting a poxy bunch of flowers as usual rather than a heart necklace (like he bought 9 years ago for some woman he got clo...
A. 16 February 2010: Even though it's been 9 years for him, it feel like yesterday for you. I've followed your story and I get the sense that your husband has never fully acknowledged that he caused you pain. Perhaps this is why you haven't been able to let go of your ... (read in full...)
Is it wrong that my husband discusses our personal life with the mother of one of his children?
Q. Please could you tell me how you would feel about this. I am recently married and have found out that my new husband discusses our personal life and things about me personally with one of the mothers of his children, asking for advice and her view ...
A. 15 February 2010: Do you discuss your relationship with your friends? Does he then have to be around your friends, knowing that you have shared personal information with them? If you don't want him to discuss things with his friend (which it sounds like she is), then ... (read in full...)
My parents want me to stay away from him after his drunken outburst, but he wants us to get back together! I really don't know what to do...
Q. hi! i'll try 2 keep this as short as i can, i've been seeing a guy for about a year and a half now were not anything official but we dont see other people sounds complicated i know! anyways we have been finished a while but last night we had a drunk ...
A. 15 February 2010: Take his behavior as a warning of what to expect from him in the future.
This time, the wall. Next time, your face.... (read in full...)
I have no respect for my wife and don't plan on having kids together. How do I tell her?
Q. Please don't judge me for what I write .... My wife and I have been married for 5 yrs. I love her deeply but I look at her as a whore. We have had a very interesting sex life since meeting, engaging in group sex, 3 sums, public sex and often sw...
A. 12 February 2010: I do think you got what you deserved: freedom from a wife who is not capable of loving you the way you need to be.
Don't look at this as the end, but the beginning of a new life for yourself, perhaps in a new town, with new people, and new expe... (read in full...)
Will the court take my kids away from me just for smoking pot?
Q. Hi there...I smoke weed and have 3 kids...I don't smoke around them and they don't know that I do it. My ex-husband knows that I have always smoked weed and now that I pushed for child support, he started calling DCF on me...twice in the last 6 ...
A. 11 February 2010: They might and your ex is forcing the issue, so you need to take some preemptive measures in the event they do order a hair test. The main thing you need to do is to demonstrate to the judge that you have stopped smoking pot and that it will not ... (read in full...)
He's married to my friend, but we're together and I'm jealous of the time they spend together.
Q. Hi there, Im really not sure anyone can help me but i need advice. I have been very hurt over the last 2 years by somebody who i work with. it is a very long story but to cut it short i fell deeply for a man i had known for three years. we would me...
A. 11 February 2010: Have you ever stepped back and asked yourself why you are so attracted to men who aren't available to you?
Stop acting a victim; YOU made the choice to get involved with your friend's husband (which is despicable, by the way). YOU decided ... (read in full...)
I've got no money to buy my girlfriend a Valentines present!
Q. Valentine is three days away and i have no money at all to buy anything for my girlfriend,this is our first valentine together and my first ever. What should i do?...
A. 11 February 2010: Can you cook? If not, ask someone who can to make her favorite meal and have a romantic candle-lit dinner at home.... (read in full...)
He keeps putting a lot of pressure on me, should I date him again or not?
Q. Ok so im a 14 year old girl. this kid i went out with before is 16. he keeps trying to go out with me again. he used to text me to try and get me to send him a pic of me naked and would get mad when i refused. he would tell me im weird and no one ...
A. 11 February 2010: You're immature because you won't send him naked pictures of yourself? This guy is an a**hole and is trying to take advantage of you. If you get back with him, expect him to pressure you more and try to manipulate you by telling you that no one will ... (read in full...)
I have no respect for my wife and don't plan on having kids together. How do I tell her?
Q. Please don't judge me for what I write .... My wife and I have been married for 5 yrs. I love her deeply but I look at her as a whore. We have had a very interesting sex life since meeting, engaging in group sex, 3 sums, public sex and often sw...
A. 10 February 2010: I'm happy to hear that you were honest with your wife--and yourself--about the whole situation. Good job, Jason, and good luck!... (read in full...)
My boyfriend is a loser and won't leave. And now I'm pregnant!
Q. I met my ex bf about a year ago while I was home for christmas break from college. My home is about an hour from my school. The relationship moved really fast and he eventually moved to Richmond with me. I think that I was lonely and he has always ...
A. 10 February 2010: If you make enough to support the family, it may be cheaper for him to stay home and take care of the baby while you work. Daycare is not a joke! However, I am of the belief that most men take pride in being the breadwinner and maybe spending time ... (read in full...)
I have no respect for my wife and don't plan on having kids together. How do I tell her?
Q. Please don't judge me for what I write .... My wife and I have been married for 5 yrs. I love her deeply but I look at her as a whore. We have had a very interesting sex life since meeting, engaging in group sex, 3 sums, public sex and often sw...
A. 9 February 2010: Anon,
There are many posts on this site from men who discovered their wives had been promiscuous in the past (before marriage) and they feel they have been deceived. Unlike these men, the poster of this question has participated in threesom... (read in full...)
I have no respect for my wife and don't plan on having kids together. How do I tell her?
Q. Please don't judge me for what I write .... My wife and I have been married for 5 yrs. I love her deeply but I look at her as a whore. We have had a very interesting sex life since meeting, engaging in group sex, 3 sums, public sex and often sw...
A. 9 February 2010: Male Anon, if a woman came on here spouting the same crap I'd be all over her ass, too. If the poster said he found out AFTER they were married that his wife engaged in all kinds of freaky stuff, I'd be more understanding. But the fact that he ... (read in full...)
Threesome in the making...
Q. My wife and I have been together 10 years and married 4. We have always been very sexual and open about our fantasies. I originally introduced her to the experience with a women and she loved it. It was very exciting for her! We would go to strip ...
A. 9 February 2010: If someone has to drink to relax before "doing what she really wants", I would still take it as a warning sign that this may not be the person you want to involve in this set-up.
You recognize the possibility that your wife and her BF may frea... (read in full...)
My boyfriend is a loser and won't leave. And now I'm pregnant!
Q. I met my ex bf about a year ago while I was home for christmas break from college. My home is about an hour from my school. The relationship moved really fast and he eventually moved to Richmond with me. I think that I was lonely and he has always ...
A. 9 February 2010: Where does he get money for weed??? I know some people smoke to deal with stress and depression, but marijuana just makes them more depressed and completely unmotivated. If you allow him back into your home, you need to demand that he leave the pot ... (read in full...)
I have no respect for my wife and don't plan on having kids together. How do I tell her?
Q. Please don't judge me for what I write .... My wife and I have been married for 5 yrs. I love her deeply but I look at her as a whore. We have had a very interesting sex life since meeting, engaging in group sex, 3 sums, public sex and often sw...
A. 9 February 2010: If you lost respect for her when you were experimenting, why did you continue? Because you enjoyed it, that's why! Now you have the nerve to question HER morals and HER values and HER ability to parent. If she's going to be a bad mom, then you are ... (read in full...)
He wants me to go through with this 3-some even although I'm not really that keen!
Q. A few weeks ago my fiance started texting me asking what I thought about threeseomes. I told him right away that I wanted to do one, thinking that he was talking about a FFM threeseome. I love to pleasure him and turn him on and he has told me ...
A. 9 February 2010: You are being bullied into a threesome and eyeswideopen is right; you are damned if you do, damned if you don't. If you do this, do you honestly think he will look at you the same? If anything, he will use the threesome as an excuse not to get ... (read in full...)
Threesome in the making...
Q. My wife and I have been together 10 years and married 4. We have always been very sexual and open about our fantasies. I originally introduced her to the experience with a women and she loved it. It was very exciting for her! We would go to strip ...
A. 8 February 2010: I think you should find someone that the two of you are not close to for this. If you have to get the BF drunk, she's probably more into the fantasy of a threesome and may regret it when sober.... (read in full...)
I'm married, will be a father in a month, but can't control my feelings for the receptionist at the gym.
Q. Hi Everyone, I am a new member on this site. I am married now for 8 months almost and we will have a baby soon. We dated for only around 1.5 years before we decided to get married. I go to this gym everyday and have started liking a girl at th...
A. 8 February 2010: Was your wife always possessive or is this something that came about during the course of her pregnancy?... (read in full...)
Should I organize my birthday plans around his access visit with his daughter?
Q. Its my birthday today, i had planned a bbq at my house, when it started to rain i told my bf i was going to change to dinner with friends at a restaurant, he said no i cant come (because he has to drop his daughter off to her mums house at 8pm) just ...
A. 8 February 2010: First of all, when I read your post I did not think you were asking him to choose you over his kid. You made plans and offered to rearrange them to accommodate him...HE'S the one acting like a brat!
The issues you present are bigger than a fall-o... (read in full...)
Let's play a game! Who is more attractive?
Q. Im the poster of the unattractive black women post (Go back and read it. Great Posts) and I think we are not seeing eye to eye, so lets play a game. For men, choose one of the following women and explain why you would date her over the other (...
A. 8 February 2010: I know they aren't part of the quiz, but here are celebrities I'd smash:
Tyrese
Idris Elba
Taye Diggs
Marcus Patrick (gotta show the light-skinned brothas some love!)
George Clooney
Russell Wong
Oded Fehr... (read in full...)
Why are black women seen as unattractive and the least or not desired mate???
Q. I am a black woman and I feel that I am not attractive because of my skin color. I have statistics behind me proving this point. 70% of black women are single. How the hell is this happening? Really? We aren't desirable in any way? Really? Not even ...
A. 8 February 2010: As an AMERICAN black woman, I feel your pain. I've had black men practically step over me to get to a white woman. I have male relatives that would never deign to date a black woman.
We're told we are emasculating, too loud, too demandin... (read in full...)
15 with a planned pregnancy!
Q. Im 15 and Pregent , Me and my boyfriend started haveing sex unprotected for about 2 month but i never i got pregent , Until One day we Both decided to Plan on haveing a Baby. Three weeks ago after he cummed inside of me . I took Three pregencey test ...
A. 6 February 2010: First, watch "Teen Mom" and "16 and Pregnant" on MTV. Tell yourself that you're not going to struggle to make ends meet or keep your relationship together or finish school like those girls because your life will be much easier.
Then turn on Disco... (read in full...)
My work colleague has left his wife for me. Should I get involved?
Q. I have been working at my work place for 11 months. It became obvious 6 months ago that one of my married work colleagues had developed feelings for me. He constantly hung around my office area during his lunch. I steadfastly ignored him. Even some ...
A. 1 January 2010: Why limit yourself to the same species? Sure, you may have something to talk about with someone who shares your profession, but more often than not all you will talk about is WORK. Finding a partner who is not a teacher may actually generate more ... (read in full...)
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