Girlfriend who broke up with me is back. What do I do?
Q. Short version: GF broke up with me 5 months ago, relationship wasn't going well but I was still wanting to continue, nothing unfixable. Took me a looooong time to start getting over her, but just had begun when I started "no contact". I still missed ...
A. 8 July 2013: Wow! I'm sorry to hear that. I'm so glad my guy has not contacted me. I would be weak and I would want to be with him in a affectionate (even sexual) way.
I really hope you are doing better and you have move on. I am feeling better. I still ... (read in full...)
How can I forget about this lady?
Q. hello everyone, i need help or advice about my situation. well it's been 2 years now since i met this lady, she lives long way away from where i live, last year i told her about my feeling to her in the phone, and she didn't say anything at all. wel...
A. 22 June 2013: I was into a guy so hard that last year this time when we separated I was paralized. I couldn't focus on anything. Last year was a blurrrrr. Seriously I couldn't think, eat, sleep....I was numb. I'm twice your age. I don't care what sex/age you ... (read in full...)
What to make of a woman who has confusing behavior
Q. I've been giving (hopefully useful) advice on Dear Cupid for a while, now I have a question myself. When I walk my dog I occassionally bump into this woman jogging. This has happened at least five times. The first time she actually saw me havi...
A. 18 June 2013: If your interested in her....then ask to meet up for coffee.... (read in full...)
We're using each other for sex so why are my friends so against him?
Q. Ok, I've been sleeping with this guy on and off for just over a year. When it all first started out he had a gf, so as you can imagine my friends don't have a very high opinion of this guy. I know it was a crappy thing to do but I didn't care, it ...
A. 18 June 2013: I think you are pretty young to be using someone for sex. I think the act of sex is a big commitment. There is a lot more invovled then the physical act. Females are wired different then males. We need the cuddling, the kissing, the touching. ... (read in full...)
Friend has given me an ultimatium--either be his girlfriend or we no longer talk
Q. I'm really close to my friend who told me he wanted to be more than friends about a year ago. Initially I said I didn't feel the same way and we tried to carry on as we had been before, talking everyday but I was seeing other people. Since then ...
A. 18 June 2013: You need to let him go and move on. I don't think you are being fair to him....especially his feelings. You don't have those kind of feelings for him. I think you flirting with him knowing that he has feelings for you is cruel.
Let him find som... (read in full...)
How can I forget about this lady?
Q. hello everyone, i need help or advice about my situation. well it's been 2 years now since i met this lady, she lives long way away from where i live, last year i told her about my feeling to her in the phone, and she didn't say anything at all. wel...
A. 18 June 2013: You seem to be doing all the right things. I think you need to delete her number, facebook, and email. Block them from yours. Go cold turkey!
All wounds take time to heal. Some are deeper than others. I wish there was a simpler answer. ... (read in full...)
I counted his viagra pills and of course I thought the inevitable
Q. I had to attend a conference that was out of state that lasted over a week. I got a nagging feeling and before I left I counted my husband's Viagra pills. When I got back I counted them again and 1/4 of a tablet was gone. He halves them and ...
A. 15 June 2013: I believe woman have a strong sixth sense. I always tell my girlfriends to trust it. It is never wrong. That deep feeling in your gut is always right.
I would still look for evidence. Everyone needs proof.
Good Luck... (read in full...)
Boyfriend takes me for granted and is encouraging me to move away
Q. My boyfriend of two years and I had a big fight today. I'm an unemployed teacher because the job market for teachers in my city is really bad right now. Before I met my boyfriend, I was contemplating a move to Massachusetts (I'm in Missouri), so I ...
A. 13 June 2013: All people react different in different situations. You have been with your boyfriend for two years. That to me is long enought to know where you are at with your relationship. If it is going to the next level. I think it is great that he is ... (read in full...)
Husband stays out until 4 am..........and wonders why I am upset about it
Q. My husband went out last night with some work colleagues for a work dinner. He said he would be home in a few hours. Well, he came home at 4 am this morning drunker than a skunk, no keys and lost his $700 cell phone and had the nerve to ask me this ...
A. 13 June 2013: I really don't have a too much of problem with what he did. If this was a common practice for your husband then yes, this is a major problem. But to go out and have some "clean" fun would not be a problem in my house. I would explain my ... (read in full...)
If I give her what she wants, how do I know I will get what I want later?
Q. My girlfriend and I have had an amazing relationship. We clicked right from the start and I have to say that I have never had feelings for anyone else than I have for her. We had a small issue earlier this year where she thought she didn't have ...
A. 12 June 2013: Wow! I think I love you! You sound very caring and loving towards your girlfriend. I think you guys have a kinda of passion that we would all love in the bedroom......but maybe not the same passion for life beyond the sheets.
You need to take ... (read in full...)
I just want an answer from him -- are we done?
Q. I was seeing a man who is 26. I am 37 with two kids who is recently seperated. We have hooked up a few times. text daily. The past week he seems cold and the texts are zero. He also was at my house and stayed over three times 2 weeks ago, but ...
A. 12 June 2013: First and foremost you children are priority. Did your friend stay over while your kids were home? If he did that is not a good example for your children. Sorry but your priority is to set a good example for them. You have made a couple of... (read in full...)
Is it ok to reconnect with my friend that I haven't talked to in over a year?
Q. I have a really unique situation here. I met this guy more than one year ago on the internet. We were pen pals and wrote back and forth for over 6 months. I was traveling to NYC and we decided to meet for the first time there: best day ever. Two ...
A. 11 June 2013: No don't do it! It is only going to hurt you. You are prolonging the end. It is over and for you to get a healthy balanced life YOU NEED TO MOVE ON!
I'm sorry you have these feelings and he doesn't... (read in full...)
Exclusive or not....what is acceptable?
Q. I want to know if I am being unrealistic or not. How long should you wait before being exclusive with someone? I am 47 years old and I met a man on POF who is soon to be 49 back in March. We are both quite attractive and we have been dating for 3 ...
A. 10 June 2013: You are too old to be playing games. He has said it all with not saying anything at all. You sound like an attractive, intelligent and independent women. Move on from this loser. You have so much more to offer someone who wants to be in a ... (read in full...)
I don't want to steal my teacher away from his wife but I do want a kiss from him!
Q. Hello everyone. I am in very difficult situation. When I was in 9 grade I felt something for my science teacher,the problem is that he is more older than me, he is over 50, I was 15 y.o. At first I didn't understand what is happening with me, I ...
A. 8 June 2013: Do you have a father in your life? Are you missing that older father figure to attend to your "daughterly" needs?
Seriously what is it?
If you kiss this (almost senior citizen) man you will want the next step. Don't do it. You will ruin yo... (read in full...)
Is it just time to walk away?
Q. Right, i have a boyfriend who i've been with for 6 months and we argue constantly. he does mean everything to me and i dont know what i'd do without him. recently, we've been arguing more than usual. we're on the verge of splitting up but i don't ...
A. 8 June 2013: You are too young of a gal to feel like crap in a relationship. If a relationship, any relationship, doesn't improve you as a person, make you happy, move on. No one should not bring joy to your life.
... (read in full...)
I'm wondering what's up with this guy? I do have feelings for him, but haven't told him yet.
Q. A guy I work with loves to stare at me all the time. He watches who I'm talking to, especially his close friends. When he is not around me then his friends chat to me. Once he's back on the scene one shuts his mouth and the other looks to see if th...
A. 8 June 2013: Go and get a coffee....when going by his office/desk ask if you can get him one. Start doing these little things to strike up a conversation.
It all starts with a "hello". That could be the sweetest hello is has ever gotten!
... (read in full...)
Girlfriend who broke up with me is back. What do I do?
Q. Short version: GF broke up with me 5 months ago, relationship wasn't going well but I was still wanting to continue, nothing unfixable. Took me a looooong time to start getting over her, but just had begun when I started "no contact". I still missed ...
A. 8 June 2013: Hey! How are you doing? Not sure if you are still checking your spot here but I was thinking of you and hoping you are still sticking to your "guns".
Have you been able to keep yourself busy? Most importantly, have you stayed away?... (read in full...)
How do I get him to tell his kids that I'm not there to pay their way?
Q. Ok, I have posted about my LDR before and this is kind of a follow up and a question. As I have said before about me not being invited to his house and being the one that is out all the money on dates and weekend trips to visit and I was worried ...
A. 8 June 2013: Wow! Get rid of him. He is using you. How dare he come to your house for the vacation, bring his kids with a $150.in his pocket. He knows exactly what you are doing.
I feel for your kids. What are you teaching them besides the obvious. Be kind ... (read in full...)
Am I wasting my time? She's a bit younger so she might be shy or I'm getting the wrong end of the stick.
Q. Heya if you could please advise.. I met a girl I like who works next door to me, I've liked her for a while but I'm naff at asking girls out, and I like to make sure shes interested.anyway about 2 weeks ago I asked if she wanted to go for a drink ...
A. 6 June 2013: Slow down. Don't get her flowers just yet. Take your time to get to know her.
... (read in full...)
I'm pregnant. My boyfriend wants me to get an abortion, but I don't feel its right. What should I do?
Q. We are not at a financial state to have a baby. We have no money. We are both students. But the more I think about having an abortion, the harder it becomes. I already feel an emotional attachment to my baby, but my boyfriend doesn't understand ...
A. 6 June 2013: You appear to understand the cost involved with having a child. Please don't do the abortion. You will regret it. I'm only saying this do to what you wrote. You need to be able to make a decision and wake up the next day and be ok with it.
... (read in full...)
How will I ever get over the other woman that I fell in love with?
Q. I'm married and fell in love with another woman. It was a deep love that I never felt or can explain. Although cheating and leaving went against everything I believed in, I truly felt I found my soul mate. I never felt my chest and heart in every ...
A. 6 June 2013: I tried to send you a private message. You are not set up. Don't get discouraged with what people are saying. My husband's side of the family barely has a relationship with me anymore. We have to do the right things for the kids. They are good ... (read in full...)
What can I say? Now the way she talks, it's like she thinks we are together again, but I'm over her.
Q. Hi cupid I am ashamed of myself. Last night, I ended up sleeping with my ex. She called me crying a lot as her brother was hit by a car in Australia. I helped her over the phone and she was crying so much that I went to her place. After she cal...
A. 26 May 2013: Be honest with yourself. You do not want to be with her. Tell her it was good last night but we are NOT back together. You were trying to be a friend and you crossed the line. Tell her your sorry.
You seem like a nice young man. Ask yourself... (read in full...)
Why have I already resigned myself to the fact that I'll never find someone ?
Q. I am 22 and pretty good looking, I get told quite often I could get most girls (by both guys and girls). To begin with it was a nice ego boost to think people believed that about me. But now it just depresses me as in actual fact I never done ...
A. 25 May 2013: Why do you feel you HAVE to be with someone? I think it is just fine that you have "only" kissed one girl. It just means you are not ready or you haven't found anyone special.
You have to change your personal conversation with yourself... (read in full...)
Should I confront my ex-bestfriend who is now sleeping with my soon to be ex-husband?
Q. My best friend and my husband are now lovers. She left her husband, he left me. She has two kids and we have one. She and he have discussed kicking me out of our family home and them moving in. I suspected something was going on for so long...
A. 20 May 2013: I'm really sorry about your situation. It sucks!!
You have to ask yourself what is the real reason to confront her?
This is not going to accomplish anything. You need to be the bigger stronger person in this. You need to love on and heal... (read in full...)
Grass isn't green on any side it seems...
Q. So here is my Story, I am in school for Police Foundation and I would one day like to become a cop. I met this girl in my college that seems to also be going for the same thing i am in seeming we are in the same classes. So we start to talk and it ...
A. 20 May 2013: First of all I think you know the right thing to do. Get rid of her. Second how can you be involved with this gal when she could possible ruin your chance of getting onto a police service. Police services in Canada have no interest in someone who ... (read in full...)
Grass isn't green on any side it seems...
Q. So here is my Story, I am in school for Police Foundation and I would one day like to become a cop. I met this girl in my college that seems to also be going for the same thing i am in seeming we are in the same classes. So we start to talk and it ...
A. 20 May 2013: First of all I think you know the right thing to do. Get rid of her. Second how can you be involved with this gal when she could possible ruin your chance of getting onto a police service. Police services in Canada have no interest in someone who ... (read in full...)
I have been invited to attend my married lover's birthday party. I don't think I should go, should I?
Q. Hi.All I'm in a very long term relationship with a married man,please no judgements,we can't end it so it goes on and has done for years. We are both in our late 60's and have known each other for over 30years.he treats me with the utmost respect a...
A. 18 May 2013: Having an affair for over 30 years. That is something in itself. I'm not going to talk about that as it appears it has worked for you
I agree with you. You should not attend this formal dinner for his birthday. This is not the time or the plac... (read in full...)
Is he avoiding me because of the blood or because he never really cared?
Q. Hello, this is a little long but please do read. This is a bit of a messy situation, literally. Yesterday i interviewed a man who i have a serious crush on, a very sexy handsome man with massive muscles, i sat next to him to take a picture and aske...
A. 17 May 2013: You do not email that at the end! You never put something like that on a professional setting. Just consider it a hook up and move on.
**shaking head**... (read in full...)
What age do most guys start thinking about a commitment to one person?
Q. Is it wrong that I don't feel like its problem that I don't have a relationship at 23? I feel pressured by my family to find a man that I can get serious with. They see hanging out with random guys as a waste of time unless they have long term ...
A. 17 May 2013: First of all your too young to settle down. You need to experience life. Travel, education, volunteer or do what you want. Don't listen to them listen to who knows you best, YOU!
Beside when you meet the one, you will know and that is when it ... (read in full...)
Girlfriend who broke up with me is back. What do I do?
Q. Short version: GF broke up with me 5 months ago, relationship wasn't going well but I was still wanting to continue, nothing unfixable. Took me a looooong time to start getting over her, but just had begun when I started "no contact". I still missed ...
A. 16 May 2013: It is almost a year for me from my break up with my boyfriend. The first couple of months were terrible. I couldn't sleep focus on work focus on my thoughts. It has gotten easier. I'm so glad he hasn't contacted me. I'm not sure I'm strong enough to ... (read in full...)
Should my best friend meet up with her (soon to be ex-) teacher?
Q. This is a question as to what would be the right or most sensible thing for me to do with regards to my best friend. We're in year 13 at our sixth form, so our last year before we go to university in October. Throughout the past two years, my friend ...
A. 16 May 2013: You and your friend are 18? She is a legal adult. In saying that I don't think his intentions are to have a "friendly" lunch. This guy appears to be a vulture, your friend his prey. Why now has he decided it is best that she not tell her parents? ... (read in full...)
I found out I'm the other girl and I'm pregnant!
Q. I went on three dates with a guy(who said he was single)I had just met. We hooked up twice, and now I'm pregnant. We tried to make things work as a couple, but he ended that after less than a day, because he said it felt forced. We both decided to ...
A. 13 May 2013: I'm sorry you are in this position. You need to seriously consider your needs and the baby's. That guy is gone.......and really he was never there just for the release of pleasure. You are going to be a single mom, are you ready mental, ph... (read in full...)
Why can't I/we seem to move on?
Q. Myself and a work mate developed strong feeling for one another, we didn't act upon them because we are both attached and not cheaters. I left the company about 7 months ago and since then have periodically text him to touch base and see how it's ...
A. 10 May 2013: Don't do it! You need to move on and find someone for your own. Just give yourself a break. Re group and don't rush into anything new. Take care of your needs first. ... (read in full...)
Not a romantic relationship question, it's a cry for help. Should I leave my alcoholic dad and start my own life?
Q. I want to move with my boyfriend and our to kids to Michigan, where we both have jobs waiting and we can stay with his Aunt for cheap while we save up for our own place. My mother died about four years ago, my dad is an alcoholic and was before m...
A. 10 May 2013: I like your idea of taking your youngest siblings with you. You and your boyfriend can get social service funds of some sort to assist you with your financial needs.......or their needs. Social service can make the decision to remove your siblings ... (read in full...)
Our online chats have left me feeling pretty intense. I don't want to screw up the first date!
Q. So I'm separated for over a year and there is this guy who I know who has been separated as well for about a year. We've known each other in the past through mutual friends but barely ever spoke. I was on Facebook 4 nights ago and he commented on my ...
A. 8 May 2013: Wow! Ok intense question. I have to say you guys are adults, your not kids you both know what you want............in saying that I don't think you should jump into bed with him. Having a conversation over the chat lines is more freeing than in ... (read in full...)
They've been acting odd ever since we came back from our holiday and asked them to move their car from our drive!
Q. I'm in an awkward situation with my neighbours and need advice... My husband and I live in an area whereby none of the houses have a garage and there is only 1 car space in the drives. There is an alternate parking area which is 10 minutes wa...
A. 7 May 2013: Personally I think your neighbours are a-holes. You gave them the time date etc for them to not be in your lane and they ignored it. I wouldn't want them as friends let alone neighbours.
You seem like a nice couple who can have lots of consider... (read in full...)
Is he reluctant to marry me?
Q. Hi aunts and uncles:) I am needing some honest advise here about my boyfriend. We dated for one year and have been living together for almost another year this coming June. So we have been together for almost two years now. I was married in t...
A. 6 May 2013: Are you crazy? You are very happy together and you want to give him the boot? Have you asked yourself why is this important to you. Why is this not important to him? Look, have a open conversation regarding your feelings about getting married. ... (read in full...)
It's over, but he still wants me around?
Q. My ex boyfriend of 5 years dumped me 4 months ago and won't let me go. He broke my heart. He told me he wasn't fully sure I was the one for him and he couldn't go on feeling these feelings of uncertainty any longer. He told me he loved me and...
A. 25 April 2013: Wow! You are torturing yourself. Move on. It hurts and is hard but having him in your life is harder. You deserve better then that! ... (read in full...)
Is it time to leave? She issued me with an ultimatum: The bachelor party or her
Q. My girlfriend(who I live with) and I have been at odds everyday for the last week. My friend has a wedding coming this weekend, and their bachelor party on Friday night. So she has made an effort to fight with me everyday. But to cut to the chase...
A. 25 April 2013: You seem like a really nice guy. As a female I had a boyfriend go to the strip club and he told me about it after. He didn't have to. But I loved him and I knew he loved me. I trusted him to do the right things. i would have an issue if you wer... (read in full...)
Should I tell my ex my true feelings? We broke up recently and since then he's phoned me and asked if I am sleeping with anyone.
Q. My ex(it's been two weeks since he left,he broke it off) spoke to me last Tuesday 5 days ago (for my birthday). We had a nice chat and at the end of the conversation he asked me if I was sleeping with anyone which I thought this was strange ...
A. 21 April 2013: For your healing process do NOT text/call or email him. He is not asking that question to see if you want to get back together. He is just being nosey.
If he loved and missed you, he would say that. You need to move forward in your life. Yo... (read in full...)
My ex is being nice and I' m missing him. How do I get some self control?
Q. Help! I love this site, you're always so helpful. I'm feeling weak because my ex is being nice and I'm missing him. I know I don't want to get back with him tho he keeps trying. Help me please to have some self control. Why do I still miss him every ...
A. 17 April 2013: You are hurting him. Do you realize that?
You need to distance yourself from him. Do not answer the phone emails or text messages. We all get lonely from time to time. Fill your time with something constructive.......use a buddy system. Ask a gi... (read in full...)
Married man let himself get close to me and now he is ignoring me.
Q. Hi all. Me and this married guy are "friends". We used to talk together a lot privately after work. He would stay back making extra time for me. He would always hold my eye contact for a long time whenever we saw each other. I caught him looki...
A. 16 April 2013: Wow!!!! You are so lost. Move on. He is interested in one night and he is gaming a game of cat and mouse. Guess which one you are?
Have respect for yourself. Do not engage in such thoughts of lust with a married man. Lust is all it is. He is no... (read in full...)
How do I stop loving this mean manipulative man? I have to see him almost every day
Q. My boyfriend of three yrs recently broke up with me and we have a daufhter together. This man is mean and manipulative but i still love him. I dont know why i would love someone who calls me names and hurts me because he doesnt love me back anymore. ...
A. 15 April 2013: Time is all we have. I left my boyfriend almost 11 months ago and I still love and miss him deeply everyday I left because of his disrespect for me. I tell you it wasn't easy but I didn't want our daughter going up and thinking his behaviour is ... (read in full...)
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