Love among the ruins
Q. I hope it's all right if I write. I'm not your traditional client. I'm 62, and I recently bumped (quite accidentally) into my very first real love, a girl for whom I gladly would have died, in 1966. The Vietnam war separated us. She then married ...
A. 21 May 2010: As you've proved you don't know what's round the corner.
Something nice let's hope. Any chance of wedding bells with you two? Keep us posted x... (read in full...)
Love among the ruins
Q. I hope it's all right if I write. I'm not your traditional client. I'm 62, and I recently bumped (quite accidentally) into my very first real love, a girl for whom I gladly would have died, in 1966. The Vietnam war separated us. She then married ...
A. 20 May 2010: Hi I'm actually double that lol. 22's just my favourite number. I'm going to keep hopeful though. x... (read in full...)
Love among the ruins
Q. I hope it's all right if I write. I'm not your traditional client. I'm 62, and I recently bumped (quite accidentally) into my very first real love, a girl for whom I gladly would have died, in 1966. The Vietnam war separated us. She then married ...
A. 17 May 2010: Thanks for your advice , I will keep that in mind. I'm so pleased that everything worked out so well for you x... (read in full...)
Love among the ruins
Q. I hope it's all right if I write. I'm not your traditional client. I'm 62, and I recently bumped (quite accidentally) into my very first real love, a girl for whom I gladly would have died, in 1966. The Vietnam war separated us. She then married ...
A. 6 April 2010: Please sell me the film rights to your story. Who will play you and debbie? There won't be a dry eye in the house x... (read in full...)
Love among the ruins
Q. I hope it's all right if I write. I'm not your traditional client. I'm 62, and I recently bumped (quite accidentally) into my very first real love, a girl for whom I gladly would have died, in 1966. The Vietnam war separated us. She then married ...
A. 26 March 2010: Have a great time both of you x... (read in full...)
What's wrong with wanting to marry a woman others might call a slut?
Q. I am an older gentleman. Raised in a religious family but never made the connection. Over the years, I have known people from all walks of life, but, other things being equal, have felt most comfortable with people who are open-minded about sex. ...
A. 14 March 2010: I never met a "floozie" I didn't like. Go for it if that's what floats your boat.
At your time of life, no one should be telling you how to live. You've earned the right to live as you see fit.
Good luck
... (read in full...)
I get jealous and angry at people in relationships.
Q. I get jealous when I see people dating or people mention the fact that they have a gf or bf.....Argh, I envy them sometimes...and it makes me mad.....What should I do? I'm probably going to move out of my parents house next year...it's frustrating. ...
A. 14 March 2010: I think you might be angry cos you're scared it's not going to happen to you. The good news is, you will get someone.
Try to feel happy for people and send out some positive thoughts about the situation and then sure enough positive things w... (read in full...)
I'm afraid I have hurt his feelings and his manhood- though isn't that better than lying there and faking it?
Q. My boyfriend and I have a fantastic relationship, we've been together almost 2 years and I genuinely couldn't be happier. My problem actually came just last night, when we were about to make love, and before I had a chance to blink, he was in...
A. 13 March 2010: It's not what you said it's the way you said it. If he suddenly criticized you performance in bed in the same manner how would you have reacted?
As far as he was concerned it was out of nowhere and his ego's taken a bashing. The silence is now t... (read in full...)
How should I do this..tell him I like him or let him read the clues??
Q. dear cupid, or whoever? i really really really like this boy and i dont know if he likes me - he texts me constantley and we always chat to eachother. but do you think i should tell him? or should i let him pick up the hints? - please reply, ...
A. 13 March 2010: I think it'll be better for you in the long run if you let him come to you. Try being patient for a while if you can.
Good luck ... (read in full...)
Why am I jealous of this negative attention, my best friend gets from the guys??
Q. One of my best friends is really short and pretty. I view myself as just an average (but my friends are helping me get over my self-esteem issues). She has mostly guy friends and that makes me sort of jealous because they're also always with her. ...
A. 13 March 2010: Hi, Your post reminds me of watching a pack of dogs standing in a butchers doorway hoping they get lucky.
They're not real friends are they? They're "friends".
She's not attracting anything you would want is she? Would you seriously want t... (read in full...)
Sex with my friend's mum!!!
Q. i want to have sex with my frinds mom and she has a guy. how can i hook up with her? she is about 30-37 and i am 20. help!!!!! her boobs are so hot !! how can i stop this ? I dont want to do it but she looks at me like she wants it to!!! ...
A. 9 March 2010: I'm sure she's really hot, but hun she's got a guy!!
Time for a cold shower.
Keep it as a fantasy or you might get more than you bargained for if her boyfriend catches on.... (read in full...)
What can I do to help my PMT???
Q. Hi, well, I think I know what's wrong with me but I'm not entirely sure :S Anyway, during my monthly cycle, towards the time when 'the painters' come (my cool little name for it :P) I get really quite depressed and anxious about stuff and I am c...
A. 9 March 2010: Hi. I suspect you won't like this, lol. If you eat really healthy your pmt symptoms won't be as bad. I know this is true. Unfortunately, when I had bad pmt I would want things like choc, chinese food etc more than ever. Evening primrose and vit ... (read in full...)
Is this lack of a father figure or something else???
Q. I'm 17 - 18 in a couple of months. It's taken me a lot of courage to start writing this, because I am very, very embarrassed about what I'm going to say and I feel like such an awful, twisted person. I have always had confidence issues, paranoia ...
A. 8 March 2010: Hi there. You judge yourself so harshly and there's no need sweetie. You must be prepared to wrestle with this need to lie though. If left unchecked, one day you may be caught out. These silly lies have very weird and wonderful ways of coming ... (read in full...)
What is he up to? Does he sound dodgy to you?
Q. Help!! A man contacted me from a dating site that i am listed; we sent friendly email back and forth for about one week; this man never asked about me or my life be just talked about what he wants in a woman and he also disclosed that his prev ...
A. 8 March 2010: He's either a playa, a nutter or a fantasist. Possibly all 3.
Stay away from this man!! I've never been more sure of anything in my life. x... (read in full...)
Why does my boyfriend never invite me round to his house?
Q. Well, ive got this boyfriend who is absolutely amazing. He always looks out for me, he always puts me first, and its a very strong relationship. Were not pressuring each other, were not constantly arguing, and were not embarrassed about hiding ...
A. 8 March 2010: Just say something like Is everything ok at home? If he says yeah or asks you why you ask, just say cos I've never been,I'm wondering what you're trying to save me from.
Try and make it a bit light hearted and not in any way confront... (read in full...)
Why is he still checking dating sites?
Q. I've been seeing this guy for a month. He is an acquaintance of my best friend, and she set us up. I thought things were going great. He's asked me to hang out almost every single day, and I see him usually 4 or 5 times a week. I've met many of his ...
A. 8 March 2010: Hi hun, I think you are spending far to much time with him far too soon. Of course you will be confused cos you're together so much yet you don't know where you stand.
You may of thought you were both looking for the same thing, but you don't kn... (read in full...)
Am I being unreasonable for feeling like he doesn't have my back?
Q. I have been dating this guy for six months and he is a really great guy. He listens to me and tries to correct any problems that we have. The problem I am having is he caters to his family tremendously and he does not really look out for me. For ...
A. 8 March 2010: Hi hun, you wrote "I do a lot for this guy like make sure his phone stays on and when he needs a ride I give it to him and when he needs money I give it to him.
This sounds like a post from a mother complaining about her teenage son.
If he h... (read in full...)
We've been dating for 8 months but never met
Q. I have been dating someone for around 8 months and met them online about a year ago. We haven't met yet and it is starting to worry me. We talk every day for hours, so there is that human connection, but as time goes on and I fall for them more and ...
A. 7 March 2010: I don't understand why you've not met yet. You can drive one end of Britain to the other in 11 hours. What's stopping you?... (read in full...)
Love among the ruins
Q. I hope it's all right if I write. I'm not your traditional client. I'm 62, and I recently bumped (quite accidentally) into my very first real love, a girl for whom I gladly would have died, in 1966. The Vietnam war separated us. She then married ...
A. 7 March 2010: I like this story. Saddle up and get on over to her house. I mean what have you got to lose?
The only thing I'd say is though don't let your imagination run riot just yet. If you come on too strong and show your hand too early to her she might ba... (read in full...)
I'm tired of dating his kids...
Q. so.... been dating this guy for 8+ years. He has 3 kids, they are now in their early 20s and one is turning 18 this year. I've spent countless weekends sitting at his house with the kids and watching tv, playing board games, going to baseball games, ...
A. 5 March 2010: I would dump him if I was looking for commitment from him. 8 years you've been together.Why aren't you married to him?Did you not want to?
I'm not really into the idea of marriage, I don't think it would suit me, so I don't live with guys either. ... (read in full...)
My life has always been controlled by my parents and now my husband. How can I break free?
Q. I grew up with very strict parents, I was not allowed to go out with friends or be independent. My day ran on a schedule, from school to various music, dance, and etiquette lessons. My parents determined how I would dress, wear my hair, and who I ...
A. 4 March 2010: Hi hun, you need to stop being so passive and start being more assertive asap.
Being in a different state or country will not change you, it will only change your location.
... (read in full...)
My girlfriend wont indulge me in my fetishes
Q. My Girlfriend of three months just recently expressed her absolute displeasure and unwillingness to engauge with my fettish for wearing overalls, before and sometimes during sex. Initially she expressed willingness to explore my preference, yet the ...
A. 4 March 2010: Hi, You've only been seeing each other for 3 months. You need to stop mentioning it altogether for a while and concentrate on making her feel good about herself and desired.
If you sow the seed in her head where she starts thinking that her nake... (read in full...)
Would you stay with someone who has issues and try to repair things or leave?
Q. Hi Aunts and Uncles, I'm really hoping for some help because my situation is distressing me and I'm lost and need guidance on how to proceed. I was in a long term relationship since 2003 then we split up in Spring 2008 but spoke to each other ...
A. 4 March 2010: Hi hun, You wrote that you'd love to make it work.
Unless he wants to make it work as well it never will EVER.
There's no magic key that you can find to fix him, and hoping that one day things will be different without some sort of epiphany fro... (read in full...)
Should I ask if he wants a girlfriend or just sex?
Q. this guy that i met online we were chatting on msn. HIM: there are lot of hoes out there ME: i didnt know that HIM: you tell me ME: how would i know more like you tell me HIM: so your decent then? ME: well i dont sleep around so i'd like ...
A. 1 March 2010: He sounds like he has a big problem with women generally.
He comes across like a guy with not a whole lot of brain.
Pass on this one and wait for a better guy ... (read in full...)
How can I make them pay for what they did to me?
Q. i recently broke up with ma guy because he cheated on me with my best friend.they both denied it and it hurt me so much because he took our love for granted and she also took our friendship for granted. what can i do 2 make them pay and see the pain ...
A. 1 March 2010: The best thing you can do is pick yourself up and make for yourself a great life. Your revenge should be knowing that people like that have the morals of an alley cat and you've had a lucky escape.
Thank god you didn't have kids or marry th... (read in full...)
Has my friend's husband crossed the line with me?
Q. I would like your opinions please as to whether you think my friend's husband has "crossed the line" with me? I have been close friends with them both for over 20 years. There has always been a bit of a spark between us and even my friend has joked ...
A. 1 March 2010: I think you're both as bad as each other. He's crossing the line and so are you.
" we message each other on facebook and send each other silly gifts " You know he fancies you and you're both playing little flirtatious games with each other be... (read in full...)
He's unreliable and I don't want to work with him, but want to keep the friendship
Q. I have a friendship with a man. We were almost an item but it didn't work out but we have continued to see each other for dinners etc (but not FWB). We get on fine so there's no problem. I have my own business and he is looking to change his life a ...
A. 28 February 2010: Hi, If you really can't work with him just tell him straight.
Tell him all the things you've told us in a calm unbothered way, like you were relating a story about someone else.
Tell him, it's not personal but you can't work like this.
If... (read in full...)
My b/f says it's the baby or him
Q. Hi I am 14 wks pregnant and been in my relationship with my boyfriend for 8 years and we have a 5 year old son together. My boyfriend is not happy about this pregnancy and says he doesnt want anymore kids and is forcing me to choose between him and ...
A. 28 February 2010: Hi there, Presumably he didn't object to having unprotected sex with you, but now the consequences are here he's holding you to ransom.
Please go and stay with family and friends if you live with him cos this is too much stress for a pregnant... (read in full...)
My boyfriend keeps getting raunchy pics of a girl he doesn't know. But won't tell her to stop. Am I being controlling?
Q. My boyfriend is 18 and we been together for 8 months now and it's the longest relationship he's had. But there's this girl who he doesn't know who she is but texts him. And she sent him a picture and in the picture she took with her cell and she was ...
A. 28 February 2010: Penguinsxtfw is spot on. What a complete tool!!!
Sweetie, do not tolerate this from any guy EVER. You're not controlling or crazy.
He is completely out of order. Please dump him and keep your power and dignity.... (read in full...)
My difficult boyfriend calls me and everyone else a 'loser'
Q. Hi Aunts and Uncles. Can you please help me! How do you define a 'loser'?? My BF calls me a 'loser' (we've been together for 5 years) and he also calls his exes and my friends 'losers'. It is really upsetting me because I don't feel as th...
A. 28 February 2010: Hi sweetie, when I found out how old your guy is at the end of your post my jaw dropped.
I thought he was in his early twenties from what you wrote.
Please dump this dreadful man. He'll just bring you down further and further as time goes on.... (read in full...)
How can I find out if he is still interested without seeming desperate?
Q. I started dating a guy about 2 months ago and he asked me out a week after we met. We got really close very quickly after we met but then he had some family and health problems going on so he was distracted so we didn't really get to see each other, ...
A. 28 February 2010: Hi there hun . The best thing you can do is nothing. Put the spotlight directly on him. If he wants to be involved he'll make it known. I fear though that from what you've written it's not likely. When I read your post the first thing that cam... (read in full...)
How do we deal with an unlabelled relationship?
Q. Although we aren't "dating", my friend and I are definitely exclusive. We trust each other and care about each other. We never established a label on the relationship, so calling each other boyfriend and girlfriend all of a sudden is a bit strange ...
A. 28 February 2010: Just call him your lover instead , it sounds more exciting than boyfriend x... (read in full...)
My online guy says he loves me all the time, how can I know he's being sincere?
Q. I'm in a long distance relationship with a guy I met online. I have met him in person and it's completely amazing how much we get a long. He said he loved me even before we met (talking for a few months, phone webcam) and I kind of took it with ...
A. 24 February 2010: Hi hun, He may believe in his mind that he is sincere, but it sounds to me like he doesn't know the meaning of the word love.
To be telling someone you've only ever talked to online that you love them should be a huge red flag for you.
... (read in full...)
Can I wear the same jeans again for a third date or will it look bad?
Q. I am seeing a guy i met online for a 3rd time..he seems really open and interested..we met saturday night for a drink and then he offered to go to dinner and then we got another drink afterwards at a different place and then he drove me home..and he ...
A. 23 February 2010: If you can, buy some sort of eye catching accessory, that will be all he sees. That's if you feel so strongly. I really doubt he'll notice hun and even if he mentioned it ( NO CHANCE ) you just say you bought a few pairs cos they were the perfect ... (read in full...)
Should I continue to pursue my dream in becoming a nurse, or just give it all up to save my marriage?
Q. I was in Nursing School, my husband's arguements stressed so much while I was in school that I failed and need to restart program. My husband says, that my dream "becoming a nurse" has doomed my marriage. Now I don't know if I should continue to ...
A. 22 February 2010: Hi there, My advice is pursue your dream or you'll end up bitter and resentful and unhappy, while his life carries on as normal.
You should be able to make time for your husband and study.
He's not thinking about you, just himself.
good... (read in full...)
What could be the reason for his non-commitment?
Q. i been dating this guy for a few months and we get along great he is a Libra and i am a Gemini, the problem is he claims he been hurt very bad in the past so he wants to take things slow, but he says he wants to be with me and calls me his ...
A. 22 February 2010: Hi there hun, Prepare yourself for some bad news. Get a friend or someone to follow him home one day.
Do you know his address? I'm pretty sure he's living with another woman. Why can't you go to his place and find out for sure?
... (read in full...)
He wants a naked picture, I am so nervous I feel I am going to puke!
Q. Okay, So this guy i have known for a couple of years, me and him have started talking... just today. and he said i had a nice body and wants a pic of me naked. i told him he probably wouldnt get it but he says that it would make him happy. should i...
A. 21 February 2010: Oh hun, NO NO NO! Absolutely no good will come of this I guarantee it!!
You say you don't want him to feel bad. If you do send him a naked picture it'll be you feeling bad when he's put it on the internet or sent it to his friends and everyone... (read in full...)
Although we are FWB he brings out the needy clingy in me!
Q. i started the whole f.w.b. with a guy i had a crush on. at first we went on quite a few dates before we had sex, but soon after it was obvious he wasn't looking for a relationship. in fact as far as i know he's never been the relationship type with ...
A. 21 February 2010: Hi sweetie, I hope you feel better soon.
This guy probably told you what he thought you wanted to hear at the time so he'd get what he wanted. Then you find out he was lying. I think FWB relationships usually don't work cos someone, usually ... (read in full...)
He cheated, we reconciled; I am now expecting his baby, I moved out as I am unhappy but I still love him. Advice?
Q. I have been in a serious relationship with my partner for almost 3 years now we started off as the couple everyone wanted to be. We got on so well barely ever argued and when we did both of us really wanted to sort it out straight away and we would ...
A. 20 February 2010: What can you do ? You'll just have to stick it out now till the baby's born.
Hopefully he'll buck his ideas up,
If not you'll have to leave him and get maintenance.... (read in full...)
Should I give him a chance or just dump him? I don't want to waste my time on another guy who is wrong for me
Q. Hi Agony Aunties and Uncles. I have posted on here and good some great feedback so I am back again. I just started dating this man from work (3rd date tomorrow) and he seems quite nice in one way but he is very very rude about his exes, ...
A. 14 February 2010: Run for the hills!!!!... (read in full...)
Am I wasting my time?
Q. I met a guy through a mutual friend. i always knew the guy from high school. For about 2 months i was told that the guy was interested in me.from past dating experiences i was just more comfortable being by myself,so i really didn't pursue the guy. ...
A. 14 February 2010: Hi there, Can I say firstly that I admire you for being strong and I wish you all the best.
I'm sure you don't want to hear this but it sounds from what you've wrote that you've had a lucky escape.
He's ignoring you cos he's lost control of ... (read in full...)
Guys showing interest only because of my breasts?
Q. Can guys be interested in a girl just because of her breasts? I feel like the only reason guys are interested in me is my breasts, like that's the only thing they see. I obviously want a guy to like me for everything that I am, not just to get ...
A. 13 February 2010: Hi, Of course some guys will be interested in you cos of your breasts.
I have a big chest and all my life I've have men talking to my tits instead of my face.
All you can do is dress modestly and don't make them a feature when you are out.
... (read in full...)
We have been together for 9 years but he is taking another woman out for Valentines Day!
Q. Hi AUnts and Uncles. I'm really distraught because my boyfriend told me a few days ago, after an argument, that he is going out with another woman (from work) tomorrow for Valentine Night and that he is going to 'stay over' at her place. We ...
A. 13 February 2010: Hi hun, This guy of yours and this awful woman who laughs at your texts, they sound like they deserve each other.
You sound like far too nice a person to be wasting your precious time with that horror of a human being.
This may be hard to h... (read in full...)
Am I being taken for a fool?
Q. I'm very confused and need advice please. a guy at work started 6 months ago and from the start i have been attracted to him. we have become very close friends but no more and for now im happy with that, hes just got divorced from his wife and she...
A. 13 February 2010: Hi hun. I'm really sorry to break this to you but he's just not that into you.
Don't adore someone you don't event trust, you shouldn't be thinking like this about him cos this is all a one way street.
You're not being honest with him anyway ... (read in full...)
I feel really battered and bruised by my boyfriend's constant abuse...
Q. Hello, I'm looking for advice re my boyfriend of ten years. I feel really battered and bruised by his abuse. He has called me names over the years, insulted my daughter (he is not her father) and he has even threatened to 'slash' my face open and ...
A. 13 February 2010: Hi honey, hope you feel a bit better than when you posted .
Your friends all think you should leave him. Please ask yourself why you think you should stay with him.
What are you getting out of it? There must be some kind of pay off in your ... (read in full...)
Have to go swimming but have my period!
Q. Hello. I have a minor problem that isn't life changing but it currently feels like a big problem! Tomorrow I have to go swimming. I really have no choice in it. But I woke up this morning and my period had started unexpectedly. I don't know what ...
A. 7 February 2010: every supermarket, corner shop and garage in the uk sells them.
You just have to practice with them till it feels comfy.
Hasn't your mum got some you can have?
You'll easy get the hang of it. sorry but there's no other option if you want... (read in full...)
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