Like what
she writes?
... Add *irdynumnums to your favourite agony aunts
Want to get in touch?
... Send *irdynumnums a private message | | | *irdynumnums's profile:I am old enough to know Not answer how old I am, wise enough to Not presume that I know all the answers, have lived in enough countries Not to assume any prejudices - and my Husband, Children and my love of Art make me tick. Have recently become a sailor and am swashbuckling on the high seas. Argh! *raising pirate hook*
Be careful what you Think, Thoughts become Words.
Be careful what you Say, Words become Actions.
Be careful what you Do, Actions will Define your Character.
...and Your Character will Determine your Destiny.
|
|
| Latest articles: Tips for New Parents!
This question has 7 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
23 July 2009: One of our agony aunts is going to have a baby soon, so I thought it might be nice to send her our best wishes and our tips, the practices on parenting that we have learned from our experiences! I'll start the ball rolling - - If you don't want a...
|
My husband's child and the mother from a past relationship are back in our lives...the child stays with us every weekend, and my life is pretty much over!
Q. Two years ago I got married for the second time. My husband has a child from a previous relationship and all the time we have been married and for all the time the child has been born the mother and the child have lived in the US. The child who is ...
A. 16 February 2011: If you state EXACTLY what you want BEFORE you get married, I view it much like a prenup contract. Perhaps you should have had it it writing; but you DID tell him in advance.
"My days of dealing with young children are over and if I had had an i... (read in full...)
My husband's child and the mother from a past relationship are back in our lives...the child stays with us every weekend, and my life is pretty much over!
Q. Two years ago I got married for the second time. My husband has a child from a previous relationship and all the time we have been married and for all the time the child has been born the mother and the child have lived in the US. The child who is ...
A. 15 February 2011: As much as I am looking forward to grandchildren, I don't think that at 55 I could ever raise a child again and I totally understand where you are coming from. My husband always said that getting our out of the house before he turned 50 was his ... (read in full...)
Could my friend be gay too?
Q. Hi, I'm a 15 year old closeted gay, and deathly afraid of anyone finding out. And I was wondering if my friend could also possibly be gay? I know it's a long question and I'm sorry. My friend, "Mike", is 15, nice, makes good grades, an athlete,...
A. 5 February 2011: Impossible to tell from this I'm sorry to say... Have you ever talked about girls with him or ASKED if he likes anyone? If there is some kind of formal or event coming up - you could ask if he is going to ask anyone to go with him. Keep asking ... (read in full...)
I get a nosebleed every time I'm near my ex!!!
Q. I split from my boyfriend of nearly 15 months about 2 and a half months ago, and I'm still not over him. Now whenever I'm near him, I get a nosebleed. Could the stress of seeing him be causing this?...
A. 5 February 2011: It's probably a good thing that you broke up. It's not great being around anyone who causes this kind of stress reaction in you, no matter what. I'm sorry about your breakup, but these things do happen to everyone when you are young - and a little ... (read in full...)
My husband's child and the mother from a past relationship are back in our lives...the child stays with us every weekend, and my life is pretty much over!
Q. Two years ago I got married for the second time. My husband has a child from a previous relationship and all the time we have been married and for all the time the child has been born the mother and the child have lived in the US. The child who is ...
A. 5 February 2011: CaringGuy nailed it. Ann Landers used to ask the question - "Would I be better off with or without him?". It's what you need to ask yourself.... (read in full...)
He hasn't replied to my second text of the morning
Q. Hi all, i need advice really, about something thats worryin me a little....... On new years eve I met a guy and had a one night stand with him. He was amazing. I really fell for him but was too shy to ask for his number, the next day he left, and I ...
A. 2 February 2011: He sent you his mobile number and asked you to text him. That's a great sign right there! If he truly wasn't interested, he wouldn't have sent his personal number - don't make him regret it! Let HIM be the next one to text - even if it takes 3 ... (read in full...)
Married 5 years, still virgins, help!
Q. This year I will celebrate my 5 year wedding anniversary. Unfortunately, my wife and I are still virgins. I love her with all of my heart. People that know us think we have the most wonderful, romantic relationship. Love letters every morning before ...
A. 2 February 2011: Technically, you aren't married unless you HAVE consummated the marriage; so you are entitled to an annulment. This isn't the same as a divorce - it means you were never married to begin with - because nothing ever began. Choose wisely the next ... (read in full...)
In love with 25 years between us
Q. I am in Love with a Young Lady 25 years younger. She loves me as well. Will this relationship work 15 to 20 years from now? Why? support your response....
A. 1 February 2011: Who Knows?... (read in full...)
Can you explain this lingo?
Q. Simple question (I think). Basically I'm used to the lingo, e.g. third-base, and I know what it all means except for one thing which really confuses me - 'pull' I've been in loads of parties and events and seen people 'pulling.' One of my friend...
A. 1 February 2011: "Pulling" just means that YOU have pulled "in" a targeted object of your attentions and that he is "into" You!!!
It's not a degree of bases or steps - just that you have HIT on the target of your affections and HE is into you as well.
Whate... (read in full...)
Will I ever stop loving my ex?
Q. I'm 19 now but when i was 15 i started seeing a boy, he was a year older than me but i loved him with all of my heart, he made me so happy, he constantly told me how much he loved me, that i was beautiful and special and he never wanted to lose me, ...
A. 28 January 2011: Give it time. I can tell you, as God is my witness, you will get to the point where he doesn't even cross your mind anymore. Honest. It's still early days for you and you haven't made a clean break if you are still in communication with him and ... (read in full...)
Any good back exersice to help ease the pain from large breasts?
Q. I know I shouldnt be complaining because most girls would love to have this problem im sure, but i have a 25 inch waist and size 32DD breasts on a small day. Normally this is an amazing gift, but my upper back and shoulders are always in really bad ...
A. 27 January 2011: You need to get to a specialty shop and get custom fitted by a professional. They will be able to get you into a better and sturdier bra that will give you more support and take some of the weight off of your shoulders. Unfortunately - the joy of ... (read in full...)
Flat tire, 6mo preggo, and bf is more worried about his xbox game?
Q. So I got a flat tire on my way to work. I'm 6 months pregnant and have no cell phone and live in MN where it was a balmy 20*f out today. I was able to stop someone driving by to use their phone and call my dad. My dad came and helped me, the only ...
A. 27 January 2011: ***and the detective work was that you called him AT home - after you finally got to work - and he is complaining about his xBox. So - he's playing xBox during the middle of the day; and he doesn't have a car - 'cause you asked your Dad for help ... (read in full...)
Flat tire, 6mo preggo, and bf is more worried about his xbox game?
Q. So I got a flat tire on my way to work. I'm 6 months pregnant and have no cell phone and live in MN where it was a balmy 20*f out today. I was able to stop someone driving by to use their phone and call my dad. My dad came and helped me, the only ...
A. 27 January 2011: You have chosen to get pregnant before marriage by an unemployed dependent boyfriend?
Just trying to clarify the situation.
If you expect the loser to also be a mindreader it may be a solution to all your problems. He could do this by phone an... (read in full...)
Being hit because he wants to freely perve
Q. Im 45 and my daughter to him is 9 months old Hi There, My Fiancee and I have been together for 3 years now. He cant stop perving.( he denys it ) I just want his attention, if he sees a hot girl on the tv ( most of the time he changes the chann...
A. 27 January 2011: Yes. You should stay and take it until he gets bored enough to slap your daughter too. You are obviously to blame. AND - of course - it's your fault that he hit you - if you were a better girlfriend and mother - he would change.
-... (read in full...)
My work environment is now so unhappy. No one is talking to me at work. What have others experienced in the same situation please?
Q. I put in my two weeks notice at work. Now no one is speaking to me! Can any one tell me about their last two weeks at work? Any other "what did you do the last 2 weeks of working at a former job"? I am having a tough time please advise......
A. 27 January 2011: Well, Firstly, I'm sorry that your co-workers are reacting this way.
It's up to YOU to rise above this behavior and set an example. YOU were the person who handed in her notice, so you know that the next two weeks are the only two weeks that you ... (read in full...)
Ladies: How do you feel about your highshool sweetheart if you aren't married to him now.
Q. I've been dealing with some insecurities about my wife's ex - the guy she dated in high school. She lost her virginity to him and by all accounts he was the love of her life until it ended. I also know that she didn't want to end it and was prett...
A. 26 January 2011: PHYSICALLY I feel far more for my husband than I ever did for my 'first love'. You are sharing far more with your partner than with a 'first love'. Your whole life!!!!!!!! It's what you promised each other. You are dealing with the issue - don't ... (read in full...)
Ladies: How do you feel about your highshool sweetheart if you aren't married to him now.
Q. I've been dealing with some insecurities about my wife's ex - the guy she dated in high school. She lost her virginity to him and by all accounts he was the love of her life until it ended. I also know that she didn't want to end it and was prett...
A. 25 January 2011: You should be worried that she is being deceptive. Not telling you "because you would freak out" is being deceptive and lying.
I think you are right - she probably IS a bit influenced by the teeny-bopper novels, it does show where her head is a... (read in full...)
Why cant one of the twins find a man yet the other has guys falling at her feet? They are basically the same person!
Q. Ok so last night we had a big discussion on this topic and we would like to get other opinions ... You can be honest we need answers !! Ok here we go .. We have a two good friend there twins .. Twin A is a nice girl very funny loves sports . She ...
A. 25 January 2011: I take it you have a twin sister?... (read in full...)
Is regular masturbation healthy?
Q. Is regular masturbation for a guy of age 19-20 is good?healthy?and will in future this will affect my sex life? i heard something like premature ejaculation occurs...same time i also heard this will improve my sex performance as i know my body mor...
A. 24 January 2011: Orgasms also release endorphins.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Endorphin
As long as it's not stopping you from any of your daily tasks and activities; masturbation is a healthy and normal sexual release. It also never results in pregnancy, herpes o... (read in full...)
Why cant one of the twins find a man yet the other has guys falling at her feet? They are basically the same person!
Q. Ok so last night we had a big discussion on this topic and we would like to get other opinions ... You can be honest we need answers !! Ok here we go .. We have a two good friend there twins .. Twin A is a nice girl very funny loves sports . She ...
A. 24 January 2011: THEY aren't the same person. They are tow separate individuals; and from the sounds of it, totally different. BUT - let's leave their looks out of it. Guys like any girl who is approachable, friendly and outgoing. THAT's why guys like her. It ... (read in full...)
How do I talk to her about her 'downstairs' hygiene without offending her?
Q. I need some help. Me and my girlfriend have been in a relationship for seven months now and its going brilliantly. We see each other regularly, go out often and our sex life is very good. But there's an issue. I have noticed on occasion that he...
A. 24 January 2011: ASK her to have a nice, sexy shower with you.
And don't forget two forms of birth control if you are also having penetrative sex. :^D... (read in full...)
Am I being unreasonable giving this co-worker the cold shoulder?
Q. I had a male friend from my work who confided in me recently that he had been reprimanded for sexual harassment. In his version of events, they joked around for quite while exlusively in spanish with an attractive girl at our office who also ...
A. 24 January 2011: Creepy.
Your first "Red Flag" was:
...What surprised me was that he was really angry about this when he recalled it to me. He acted as if it were all her fault and he was FURIOUS she had reported him. He literally bristled while telling me this.
H... (read in full...)
Wedding bells or I'm outta here...
Q. After 7 years of living together my boyfriend and I split up and he moved out. We had been fighting all the time, I was very unhappy mostly due to his underemployment and lack of motivation. Three weeks after he found a good job we had another big ...
A. 23 January 2011: Sounds like he went from his Mothers house to Your house and never grew up. You probably made the first mistake by moving in with him before you were married; now he just thinks it't the status quo and he doesn't accept any of his responsibilities ... (read in full...)
Should I tell my teacher how I feel about him?
Q. Basically I'm in love with my teacher, yeah you've heard it all before I understand, this is just typical, he pays me special attention, touches my body like waist and arms. He makes jokes that can be taken in different ways and says things I could ...
A. 21 January 2011: Well. That's creepy.
I guess you will think that this is love. Nope. Not even close. You are young, surging with hormones and vulnerable to an older, wiser, influential male. This kind of attraction IS a normal female attraction. This is t... (read in full...)
How do I explain to my friend's wife that we are just friends?
Q. ok this may sound a bit weird but here goes. i have this guy friend who ive known for ages and he is married with 2 kids, he has currently been seperated from his wife 4 a year so far and even before that they had this on off relationship they wou...
A. 21 January 2011: Your question held a few judgements on her; she's after his money when he dies (?); she abuses him and she snoops on his phone. You are only getting his side of the story - I'm sure there is much more here that hasn't been disclosed. (Isn't ... (read in full...)
Why did he give me an engagement ring but he can't marry me? We broke up because of this!
Q. I've been seening a wonderful man for over 3 years. We were engaged briefly last year but he just couldn't commit. I was very confused last Christmas because I decided to accept that we were never going to marry and told him so, he seemed really ...
A. 21 January 2011: People need different things at different ages. Often; people opt for companionship in their latter years - mainly because of the money and legal issues that they have spent a lifetime building. Family and pensions are also thrown in the mix. You ... (read in full...)
What's it like moving on from your first love?
Q. Has anyone got any experiences to share about getting over their first love/first relationship? My ex-boyfriend broke up with me in May last year. In some ways I feel that I've moved on, but recently I felt as if I still love him and will for a long ...
A. 20 January 2011: Thanks! Hope you have the same luck that I did! x x x... (read in full...)
Birth control/sex question!
Q. My boyfriend and I are planning on having sex after 3 years together. We will use Ortho Options Gynol II contraceptive gel and Trojan Warming sensations condoms. My first question is what would the effectiveness of these together be? and secondly ...
A. 20 January 2011: Thinner can obviously break more often; which is a factor in effectiveness. There are statistics on the net for ideal contraception use and it's actual efficacy under "normal" use - and these statistics are going to vary!!!!
Don't do lambskin unti... (read in full...)
What's it like moving on from your first love?
Q. Has anyone got any experiences to share about getting over their first love/first relationship? My ex-boyfriend broke up with me in May last year. In some ways I feel that I've moved on, but recently I felt as if I still love him and will for a long ...
A. 20 January 2011: BTW, make sure that you don't sequester yourself and sit and mope. Lots of good food, great friends a fresh air help when you are blue. Sending hugs. x x x ... (read in full...)
What's it like moving on from your first love?
Q. Has anyone got any experiences to share about getting over their first love/first relationship? My ex-boyfriend broke up with me in May last year. In some ways I feel that I've moved on, but recently I felt as if I still love him and will for a long ...
A. 20 January 2011: My first love was when I was 16. We were boyfriend and girlfriend for 6 months; even though we never went all the way in any fashion, emotionally - he was my first love. He was very good looking, a great athlete, a smart ass and a charming ladies ... (read in full...)
I'm at my wits end about my husband's mate who comes to my place at 6pm and they play xbox till 7 am!!
Q. hey, im hoping someone will help me. me and my husband have a 1year old baby. my husband has lost alot of friends since we got together, mainly due to jealousy. He only has one mate now. They are quiet close and his mate *steve comes round every fr...
A. 18 January 2011: Like I said -
Put your foot down. Make rules. You aren't single any more and you're right; it's not fair. Talk to him about what you expect an how your weekends should go. God knows you are both probably running on a sleep deficit already, putt... (read in full...)
I'm at my wits end about my husband's mate who comes to my place at 6pm and they play xbox till 7 am!!
Q. hey, im hoping someone will help me. me and my husband have a 1year old baby. my husband has lost alot of friends since we got together, mainly due to jealousy. He only has one mate now. They are quiet close and his mate *steve comes round every fr...
A. 18 January 2011: Put your foot down and make some house rules. Your husband isn't going to do it; so it's up to you.
If he's as good a friend as he says; Steve will understand that a household with a baby needs some downtime from xBox - 3 a.m. is WAY more than... (read in full...)
Why do many women have the chance to marry more than once in their lives when other none?
Q. What does it takes for someone (mostly women) who had a divorce or went through a bad experience to get several chances in their lives and marry once, twice or more and happened to find people who want to marry them. There are others who never find ...
A. 18 January 2011: "this means that the "right" guy for you could be already taken even if he's not with someone who is right for him."
Does this explain why women think it's okay to sleep with a married guy? Nice to think that every else can pass judgement on a marr... (read in full...)
Should I get a clitoral hood piercing?
Q. My fiancee wants me to get a clitoral hood piercing. I work in OB/GYN, and I fear all the horrible things that could go wrong (infection, ruining my sex life etc..) Any experience from anyone out there? Is it really that big of a turn on or sexual p...
A. 17 January 2011: If it's not your idea and you would had never considered doing it in the first place; then I would tell your fiance to get a Prince Albert first and after that; you might entertain considering it. Yowzers.
h... (read in full...)
Am I an awful person for not wanting him to go on a boys holiday?
Q. My bf broke my heart a year ago by lying and meeting up with his ex/saving half-naked photos of her on his computer. We made up and he's been good since then.My trust is SLOWLY starting to build up, but by no means is it there yet. He suddenly ...
A. 17 January 2011: Totally agree with CaringGuy. He's supposed to be working hard to win back your trust right now; and that means jumping through hoops and doing EVERYTHING in order to win back that trust.
Boys holidays with single men involved can lead to eggi... (read in full...)
Should I talk all the time on stay quite during a movie date?
Q. Me and my boyfriend are going to the movies in a couple of weeks. We have been dating for two months and this is our first actual date. Iv been out to dates at resturaunts and iv met my ex s parents but iv never been to the movies on a date. am i ...
A. 17 January 2011: Movies are for watching, dinners are for talking.... (read in full...)
Should I be happy that he won?
Q. I played chess with my boyfriend 3 times and I lost all of them. My boyfriend is dyslexic (although he is one very talented guy, he loves arts and plays the guitar and piano like a pro) and in school, he's placed in the last class. Me however, I'm ...
A. 17 January 2011: I know where you are coming from, believe me. I've been with a brilliant guy for the last 38 years, and we are competitive as hell with each other! He's actually worse than I am at this; and I love that we are always within a couple of points or ... (read in full...)
Why do many women have the chance to marry more than once in their lives when other none?
Q. What does it takes for someone (mostly women) who had a divorce or went through a bad experience to get several chances in their lives and marry once, twice or more and happened to find people who want to marry them. There are others who never find ...
A. 17 January 2011: Life's not fair.
Plus you do tend to get out of it what you put into it, but even then, life's not fair and nobody ever gave me a manual; even tho' a lot of touchy-feely books have been written to explain things like this. I'm a big believer in m... (read in full...)
My husband tells me he doesn't know.
Q. Why is it, that a guy would have the same answer to literally EVERY question, that he should know: "I don't know" it is driving me insane. I actually feel like I'm going crazy. It could be about food, beer, how to cook something, (he has cooked his ...
A. 17 January 2011: Why does he have to have all the answers anyways? I hate feeling the same way when my husband want me to tell him where everything in the house is; as far as I know, it's his house too! I tell him that "my uterus is not a tracking device". ... (read in full...)
"Female pre-mature ejaculation"....what do I do??
Q. I have what people call "female pre-mature ejaculation". When I was a teen, I think I masturbated maybe three times during those six years, so I've never really had a full-on release by myself. I just didn't like the feeling of my fingers being ...
A. 15 January 2011: Since you can have as many orgasms as you like; what is the problem? It's not a race, it's not a tally and it's not a competition. I'd just relax and enjoy la difference. Sometimes, life IS fair.
BTW; no couple comes at the same time or as ofte... (read in full...)
Her family don't want us in contact after we texted. I'm wondering how I should address this?
Q. My lady friend's daughter snooped her phone and caught us cyber-sex-ting She is 72 and I am 69 and now they will not let me see her mother. Any advice? It was only texting and nothing being acted out. They say she has memory problems, which she does ...
A. 15 January 2011: It's really difficult to judge the state of a family or their affections. I hired someone to look after my husband's father and she managed to alienate our family to everyone else in the town she moved him to and secure his inheritance for her and ... (read in full...)
Her family don't want us in contact after we texted. I'm wondering how I should address this?
Q. My lady friend's daughter snooped her phone and caught us cyber-sex-ting She is 72 and I am 69 and now they will not let me see her mother. Any advice? It was only texting and nothing being acted out. They say she has memory problems, which she does ...
A. 14 January 2011: Yeah, like dirtball said, that's just not right. Can you visit her? At your ages, there's nothing wrong with any kind of loving and her kids wishes shouldn't be leaving her feeling so sad! Perhaps face-to-face communication would be the best ... (read in full...)
No christmas or birthday card from my boyfriend, is it OK for me to be upset?
Q. I wrote on here a few weeks ago about how my boyfriend of 5 months didn't get me even a card for Christmas after I got him a $200 gift. My birthday was a week later and I did not get even a card for that either. Am I being a baby or do I have a r...
A. 14 January 2011: hahahaha eyes!... (read in full...)
No christmas or birthday card from my boyfriend, is it OK for me to be upset?
Q. I wrote on here a few weeks ago about how my boyfriend of 5 months didn't get me even a card for Christmas after I got him a $200 gift. My birthday was a week later and I did not get even a card for that either. Am I being a baby or do I have a r...
A. 14 January 2011: ASK HIM! Sit him down, tell him everything that you have told us and Ask Him!!! If you can't talk things out with him, he's not much of a boyfriend. ... (read in full...)
| *irdynumnums's friends
These are mutual friends, so *irdynumnums has
added them and they have added *irdynumnums!
|
