My estranged husband is still trying to rule my life.
Q. My "estranged" husband is always trying to keep tabs on me and I feel like it's an invasion of my privacy. We are separated and no longer live together. We have a young child (under 10) who lives with me and will stay with him on the occasional w...
A. 4 December 2019: Let him freak out. Tell him what you do is none of his business and stick to it. If you haven’t you need to get a formal separation agreement. One that spells out custody and visitation.
Again continue to tell him what you do is none of his busi... (read in full...)
Is my wife exaggerating everything just to try and make me feel bad?
Q. Last week my wife injured her pinky toe after we (her being barefoot and me with shoes on) clipped each other's feet as we walked past each other. It was a freak accident. She was in a lot of pain and there was a bit of blood. At first she was ...
A. 2 December 2019: Thoughts? You married a drama queen who has no problem exaggerating to make you feel bad about a minor accident. And also has no problem bad mouthing you to her friends. ... (read in full...)
I think this girl was just using me!
Q. at work, a female joined and she seem quite friendly and we got to know each other. she wasn’t with the company for long as she was going back to college. when I messaged her to ask what course she was doing and if she might come back to work in the ...
A. 1 December 2019: Using you how by being friendly? What planet do you live on that being friendly with a co worker qualifies as using? ... (read in full...)
I'm having weird sexual dreams about my inlaws.
Q. I’m 30 married for 9 years to a great husband with a good family. My father died when I was 2 and went thru an extremely traumatizing, sexually and physically abusive child hood. Now that I really trust my in laws and am pretty happy, I find ...
A. 23 November 2019: This is not a bash but maybe you need to see a therapist. A trained person will do a much better job of helping you sort this than a group of anonymous amateurs on the internet can.
You know you have issues please deal with them for your own sake... (read in full...)
My wife doesn't want to reconcile so why does she care if I'm drinking or not?
Q. My wife has moved out of our home because I drink alcohol. Since she moved, she had several times if I am drinking. She, does not want to reconcile. So, why does she keep asking if I am drinking when we talk by phone? Thank you for your answers....
A. 23 November 2019: Because she cares about you. If your drinking ended your marriage you probably have a problem. I hope you get help for it.... (read in full...)
My wife's workouts are getting out of control
Q. My wife wanted to lose some weight for upcoming vacation so I encouraged her to get a trainer. A friend of hers recommend a 'gay' guy (Joe) she knew that worked out of his house at nights. Once I found out he was gay, I begged her to wear her shin...
A. 23 November 2019: You have got to be kidding? You found condoms in her bag but you don’t think she’s done anything with her “gay” trainer? Well she’s using them somewhere sport. But my guess is this guy isn’t as gay as your wife and her friend are letting on.
... (read in full...)
Should I return the call of my estranged aunt?
Q. Hi All, I've been estranged from my father's family for over twelve years. It's a very long story but in short, after he and my grandmother died, there was a lot of anger, resentment and accusations. Because he and my mom were separated at the...
A. 4 November 2019: Call her. What have you got to lose. Why keep yourself estranged from someone you have fond memories of. It probably took a lot of courage for her to call you. Show some courage yourself.... (read in full...)
Should I ask my brother in law why he refuses to go on vacations with our family?
Q. My brother-in-law, Sean, is extremely close to his nieces and nephew (his brother and I are the parents of his oldest niece and nephew). He takes them to all the fun places (the Aquarium, the zoo, Chuck E Cheese, different parks, the movie theater, ...
A. 18 October 2019: It’s nice that you want to include your BiL in your family time. But it sounds as if he has told you repeatedly that he doesn’t want to vacation with you. Leave him alone and enjoy your time with your family.... (read in full...)
Why would my ex lie and tell me he had no family when he did?
Q. I dated my ex for about a year, it was a year full of ups and downs, tiring for me mentally. We always had alot of problems, but i was naive enough to be manipulated by him because he's my first boyfriend. Basically, when i first met him, he told me ...
A. 18 October 2019: If he is estranged from his family for good reasons or bad it may have been easier to say he had no family rather than try to explain why he is estranged.
But there is no proof that he is telling the truth now. You’ve broken up with him and from... (read in full...)
I'm upset that I'm feeling hesitant, has anyone else experienced this?
Q. I've come here for help when my heart has been broken and always appreciated the thoughtful, insightful responses complete strangers have given me. My question today is about a personal issue I have in moving forward with a great guy. I've been...
A. 18 October 2019: You’re experiencing hesitation because you know he is not the right guy for you. You’re staying in this because you hope that in time all of his good qualities will overcome your lack of attraction. That seems unfair to both of you.
One more thin... (read in full...)
My live in lover found out that I am not divorced like I said I was
Q. Hello, I am almost 30 yrs old and have made the worst mistake. I had bn living contently in a broken marriage for 5yrs hurting everyday from what my spouse put me through. Finally i decided i deserved happiness and took matters into my own hands. I ...
A. 3 October 2019: He no longer trust you. With good reason as you have been lying to him since day one. You believe he has cheated on you as revenge for your lying. That is an extremely childish act.
Sit down with him and ask if he is willing to see a couples coun... (read in full...)
My girlfriend isnt bother by people invading her personal space.
Q. My girlfriend seems to not be bothered by people getting too close up in her personal space . When she looking for things or working she doesn't seem phase by people squeezing through her or their body brushing up against hers without even flinching ...
A. 2 October 2019: Your girlfriend isn’t the problem. Your jealousy and insecurity is. So no, there is no way that you can talk to her about your insecurity and jealousy without sounding insecure and jealous. ... (read in full...)
How do I tell my girlfriend, "sorry, my life has been a lie, I'm gay and a cross dresser"?
Q. I'm gay and I don't know how to tell my partner or even how to live as a gay man. I've been attracted to other men for as long as I can remember, but I've only dated women, or had relationships with women. At first I told myself I must be bisexual...
A. 2 October 2019: End the relationship as gently as you can this poor woman deserves better than to have you waste anymore of her time. Then get yourself to a therapist one who can help you come to grips with who you are. Then maybe you’ll stop messing with Women’s ... (read in full...)
My sister is never there for me yet always expects me to be there for her
Q. The last few days I haven't felt well so I had to go to hospital last night. Just before my sister had called and said that I'm not my usual happy self and all I've done is complain about my health for two weeks. I corrected her and said it had been ...
A. 2 October 2019: You don’t have to handle her. You handle yourself. If you’re tired of listening to her and giving her advice. Stop listening and stop giving advice.
When she starts complaining tell her Sorry sis I have to go. Then hang up the phone or actu... (read in full...)
I want to end my relationship with a married man
Q. I am in a relationship with a marrired man for past 8months. We had known for last three years. I am truly in love with him though its wrong. I don't have any intention to destroy his beautiful family. Hes got a heart of gold. I wanted to end the ...
A. 2 October 2019: A heart of gold. Yet he cheats on his wife. Yeah I’m sure that’s possible.
If you want to end it end it. Send him an email or text or What’s App message telling him that it’s over between you. Then block him in all the ways he contacts you. If he s... (read in full...)
I want your opinions on how I handled this situation?
Q. Hello members of DC, I'm here to seek your opinion on the following. A bit of history - My ex husband and I have been separated for 9 years. Financially, my ex and I split our children's tuition and living expenses in half and we keep in contact ...
A. 27 September 2019: When this teacher gets back you need to sit down with her and her boss and tell her in no uncertain terms that she is never to put your daughter in such a position again.
Your ex husband is another matter. Clearly your ex still wants you which is w... (read in full...)
Does my gf cheat or just have a guy friend?
Q. Hi Everyone, I have a question to ask. My girlfriend and I have been dating for 9 months. We live in different towns about 10 miles apart. One of my good male friends works in that town also. My gf and I get together 3 or 4 days per week. We have ...
A. 15 September 2019: She’s breaking dates with you to go on dates and that’s what they are with this other guy. Read everything you wrote, (they are doing everything a couple does) and then ask yourself why you think she is your girlfriend. ... (read in full...)
My ex girlfriend's relationship with her brother in law seemed too cozy to me
Q. My ex gf 5yrs+ and I just recently broken up few days ago . Long story I went to go visit her for the second time at her place (long distance relationship ) stayed 3 weeks. The first week was hot romance and she couldn't get enough of me and than ...
A. 11 September 2019: She’s your ex why do you care? If ever there was a MYOB situation it’s this one.... (read in full...)
Why does my former boss/lover want to stay in touch?
Q. I had an affair with my boss. We are both married. I’ve worked for him for 7 years and I’d say emotionally it’s been going on since year 1 or 2. Physically, it started nearly two years ago. Within 8 months of it starting physically, I ended it (for ...
A. 9 September 2019: You had an affair with him once. He hopes that if he keeps in touch you’ll resume the affair. I guess he figures once a cheater always a cheater. ... (read in full...)
Do I gain weight to please him?
Q. My boyfriend and I have been together for two years. We have a child together. When I was pregnant he told me that I better get the weight off after delivery. He said “fat girls don’t get love”. So I did it. I lost all the baby weight within 11 ...
A. 30 August 2019: Why would you put up with this douche? You need to dump this creep. Yesterday. ... (read in full...)
Wife lied, she wasn't a virgin. What do you think? What should I do?
Q. Ever since my wife and i met she has always been a very conservative virgin girl, her choice and she was very string that it was important to her. I knew she had a BF before me but she insisted she was a virgin and it was very important to her. This ...
A. 30 August 2019: Do I believe nothing happened when she was taking the nude shots? Yes but I believe the earth is flat so I may not be a good judge. But seriously, It was before you got together so it had nothing to do with you.
The constant lying is a diff... (read in full...)
I don't understand why my ex does the things that she does
Q. My girlfriend broke up with me back in January. We have seen one another on and off all on her terms when she wants to meet up, when she wants to speak etc. We went away for a weekend together and ended up having sex. We then went away on holiday ...
A. 27 August 2019: She calls you come running, she has sex with you she sends you away, repeat. Do you see a pattern here. As long as you’re willing to give her access to your body she’s going to take. Perhaps it’s time you tell her no more.... (read in full...)
Does my partner have the right to know about the details of my therapy sessions?
Q. Hi. I won't bore you with too many details. Just want to know if you think it is appropriate for your spouse/partner to ask you about the details of your therapy sessions? I was diagnosed with anxiety and PTSD. I have begun counselling rece...
A. 20 August 2019: You should only tell him what you are comfortable telling him. He has no right to know anything else. ... (read in full...)
Wife is angry that I hugged a co-worker
Q. My wife is angry I hugged a female former co-worker/friend that I have known for 10 years. When we seen this old co worker I have not seen her in 2 years and she is over 20 years older than me. She has met my kids. When my mother passed she sent ...
A. 20 August 2019: Sounds like your wife is insecure controlling and vindictive. I assume she has some good qualities that outweigh the things I listed. A lot of good qualities. Otherwise I cannot imagine why you would put up with childish behavior like this.
You n... (read in full...)
Am I right to feel this way that my son's friend's mother didn't acknowledge me?
Q. Hello People!!! Okay so my 6 year old son plays Pee wee football. Their is a friendly competition between him and his teammate A as I will call him. Basically A’s mom and my husband have communicated hear and their about the boys and how they can ...
A. 17 August 2019: Your husband and this woman know each other, it was their responsibility to introduce their spouses. She didn’t speak to you and your husband had to introduce himself to her SO, clearly her manners are lacking. But your hubby failed to introduce ... (read in full...)
Am I overreacting about his unwillingness to go on vacation with me?
Q. Dear Cupid I have been married for a year and I know my husband 3 years before marriage. We lived together for a year before tying the knot My husband do not want to go for vacation with me, every time this ends up in fight or argument. He...
A. 17 August 2019: How does he make you go with him? If you don’t want to go with him don’t. If he doesn’t want to go on vacation with you find a friend or relative who likes to travel and go with her.
... (read in full...)
How to approach her obsession with her looks
Q. Wife bought waist trainer corset. When I first saw it on her, she looked super sexy; tiny waist with huge boobs (DD; what a dream. I made the mistake of telling her how hot she was and as a result, she started wearing it all the time. Over time, she ...
A. 17 August 2019: Enjoy it and do not let your jealousy or insecurity get the better of you!... (read in full...)
I'm jealous of my girlfriend's room mate. Overthinking or should I be worried?
Q. Hi DearCupid, Me and my girlfriend have been together for just over a year now, we're both a little damaged from our last relationships but we make sure to talk to each other if we're ever feeling insecure/upset etc. Usually I'd just talk to her...
A. 17 August 2019: Use the time she is spending with her roommate to cultivate other friendships. If you know what I mean.
But seriously it sounds like you think she is your girlfriend and she thinks you are the guy she is occasionally dating.
As far as her turning ... (read in full...)
Do most men see short women as less attractive than tall women .
Q. Do most men see short women as less attractive than tall women . I often see descriptions of ‘hot ‘ or attractive women include the word tall and cute or sweet women as shorter . Obviously individuals have individual preferences but in GENERAL is ...
A. 17 August 2019: All men are different; some like tall women others like short women and some like both.
For me the important thing is that the woman be confident and well groomed. ... (read in full...)
I know he wasn't the man for me but it's so hard to move on
Q. I married the man of my dreams this past November. In May, I learned that he's been having an affair since February, barely three months into our marriage. I moved out and we filed for a non-contested divorce. Now I'm finally free of him and decided ...
A. 17 August 2019: First Stop comparing yourself to other people and their marriages. You don’t know what is going on behind closed doors.
Second you are going through the grieving process. And everyone grieves in their own way in their own time. If you don’t thin... (read in full...)
I'm in love with 2 men and unable to choose
Q. I'm in love with two men and unable to choose. my long term boyfriend who I have been with for over a decade but I find im not physically attracted to him anymore and don't want sex with him but I do love him and his personality is like my soul ...
A. 10 August 2019: Go with the new guy. Your boyfriend deserves better... (read in full...)
How do I come back from being the bad guy in the marriage? Its affecting me both mentally and physically
Q. I’ll just dive right in since I don’t really know how to begin. My husband and I separated for a while for many reasons, two of the biggest being he neglected and ignored me for two years and I ended up having an emotional affair with one person for ...
A. 10 August 2019: Why are you with this guy? You need to find a job, a lawyer, a counselor and a new place to live. Because how you’re living now isn’t a life it’s a prison sentence.
It’s shocking that somehow the man who ignored you for two years. Forcing you to f... (read in full...)
Do I have to invite this person to my party?
Q. I'm having a birthday party soon.I have to restrict numbers because of budget. Some of the people coming are frinds of my gf- I've been with her for 10 years. There's one particular guy I can't stand. He often makes digs at me, and although never d...
A. 31 July 2019: Do not invite anyone to your if you dislike him or her. Of course you need to stop attending his parties. If your lady friend insist on going to a party thrown by a disagreeable racist let her go by herself.... (read in full...)
I don't understand why men cheat
Q. Why do guys cheat? Is it because the sex is no good with me or is it because hes just a man?...
A. 20 July 2019: For the same reasons women cheat. Mostly ego and opportunity.... (read in full...)
Worried that my wife may get what I am too tired to give from her ex fiance!
Q. I need some advice as to what I should do, if anything, about a situation that has come up in my marriage. We have been married for 4 yrs. I am 27 and my wife is 26. Our marriage is mostly good and our sex life is good but our twice a week norm is ...
A. 15 July 2019: You’re kidding right? How can you question your good fortune? Home improvements done for half the cost of everyone else and the added bonus that it’s being done by someone you trust. Sorry someone your wife trust. Since you apparently can’t te... (read in full...)
Am I in denial that we are over?
Q. My ex of 6.5 years left 5 months ago. Well, she sort of left. She moved in with a family member saying she wasn't sure what she wanted. She comes round once or twice during the week for dinner and stays every weekend. We don't have sex or anything ...
A. 15 July 2019: How long are you willing to put up with this? Tell your wife that the two of you need to see a counselor and then make an appointment. If she refuses to go you go on your own. Perhaps the counselor can help you figure out why you are so willing ... (read in full...)
I'm in love with my boyfriend's best friend!
Q. I just need some advice on a situation I am overwhelmed by. im not sure how common this situation is , I don't want to be judged I just need some help. so the situation is this. I have been with my boyfriend for four years, our relationship has...
A. 20 June 2019: This happens to people all the time. You have two choices: Tell your boyfriend how you feel. Explain to him that it’s nothing he’s done but you have fallen for someone else. And send him on his way with your deepest apologies.
Or you can choo... (read in full...)
Is it okay to not want to contact my only remaining family?
Q. Hi, I’l l try and keep this short. I am not angry or sad. If anything I feel at piece. However, recently some mutual friends have started pressuring me into reconnecting with my family and I know they mean well, but… I just do not feel th...
A. 16 June 2019: Tell these so called friends to butt out. Your mother’s family have shown you who they are. Do not give them any more chances to abuse you. ... (read in full...)
Who is the guarded one? I’m ready for a relationship and am willing to work on opening up!
Q. I’m looking at online dating and chatting with a guy.He keeps saying, I’m guarded.But I’m prepared to trust, tell him whatever he needs to know,. I’ve told him to ask, what does he want to know.? I want to get to know him and have told him so. He ...
A. 9 June 2019: You may want to stop communicating with this guy and find someone else. He sounds manipulative and as if he is fishing for information.
Don’t let your desire for a new relationship push you into a compromising situation. ... (read in full...)
Our vacation centers always around my boyfriend
Q. I've been with my bf for nearly 5 years. He's from a different country so we don't get to go on vacation unless it's to see his friends and family. I don't mind but when we do go we don't get time to relax. I've gotten sick on this trip to the point ...
A. 9 June 2019: You’re an adult. If you don’t want to visit his relatives don’t. Tell him to go visit his relatives and you’re going to the lake country or wherever you like this year.... (read in full...)
Should I delete my email account altogether so that he can't get in touch with me?
Q. Hello my ex- fiancé and I broke up 7 months ago. We’re together for about two years! He moved to another country because he is in the military. Anyway to make things easier I blocked him off of all social media, phone etc. Today he emailed me! All ...
A. 9 June 2019: Figure out how to use the block feature on your email ... (read in full...)
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