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*harat mehta agony aunt

*harat mehta

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I am a person of Philosophy: A science of non-contradictory vision. I wish to guide problem related to life, relationships, and sex, through this knowledge of philosophy and in addition, through the knowledge of Tantra Vision. Our modern Individualistic mode of life required such guidance. I will write series of articles on tantra, which anyone can read if feel guiding, and in addition, I will reply to the questioners with quoting relevant materials from articles.

Latest articles:

An Introduction to TANTRA. .As, power of light.

No replies yet...

3 February 2010: Article No 2...MEANING OF OBJECT. ... The object, so conceptualized by the word ‘tantra’ is sex organ in a state of erection. So, the object underlines the ideology of ‘eroticism. Here eroticism is principle, or philosophy, and not sexology...

An Introduction to TANTRA.

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26 January 2010: Tantra is a word belong to ancient Indian Sanskrit language. This word has been used by scholars in many ways, such as [1] It is used as a religious way with the ideas of god and goddess or deva and devis, temples, prayers, meditations, chanting ...

Think sex and Get pleasure..

No replies yet...

10 December 2009: What I am suppose to think? and What I am suppose to do? - in the realm of sex. This one is really hardest problem of life. Let me be the guide for those who want to think for themselves and want to be the original actor, and not a cheap imitator...

Sex existed before religion, and is the reason for relationships

This question has 4 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted

29 November 2009: Relationship is problem, perhaps most fatal problem. All destructive event like murder to suicide occur from bad terms of relations. It is also true that men cannot live without relating with something or with someone. So, it is quite necessary to ...

< Prev1234567891011Next > [11 pages, 418 answers]

I have no respect for my wife and don't plan on having kids together. How do I tell her?

Q.   Please don't judge me for what I write .... My wife and I have been married for 5 yrs. I love her deeply but I look at her as a whore. We have had a very interesting sex life since meeting, engaging in group sex, 3 sums, public sex and often sw...

A.   12 February 2010: Gentlemen, you are facing emotional crisis. It is all in emotional crisis. You love your wife, but she do not wish to play the role of 'wife' with you, which will be more hurting to you then anything else. Only sex cannot please all the time, to ... (read in full...)

My sisters breasts are bigger than mine, will he choose her over me?

Q.   Hi, I am with a man, and I love him and he loves me deeply. But he is very, very sexual. He watches porn all the time and he basically has one of the highest sex drives knows to man. Well, I have this insecurity. I have really small brea...

A.   12 February 2010: Please...please...please, do not allow jealousy to rule your wisdom, to rule your choice, to rule your love making. Relationships never evolve around sexual attractiveness, but around intellectual wavelength possess by both. Good sex never de... (read in full...)

Why does monogamy exist? What's the use?

Q.   Why does monogamy exist? I don't get it. A lot of people - men and women - cheat. I've not been cheated on, but I see it happen often. It's often been said humans are not monogamous by nature, and I guess it's true. I get that people need love and ...

A.   12 February 2010: Thanks. You start very interesting topic. Monogamy as a system, is perfect as unit of family. And, family is not only good for children, but more, family serve as a unit of cognitive power. You see, doctor's children are doctor, artist's children ... (read in full...)

How do I relax & just let him please me?

Q.   hey, am dating this guy..hes really sweet, Amazing, good looking.. and i love make love with him.. he loves pleasing me..always asking what i like etc: hes soo great:) ok the thing he says he wants to go down me..but i feel nervous cos no gu...

A.   11 February 2010: See, shyness in sexual activity is not a good things. And, here oral sex is such a powerful sex play, that many couple use it as if it is a normal intercourse. And, really it is more powerful than vaginal intercourse. If shyness is problem ... (read in full...)

I cant cope with my husband's penchant for porn!

Q.   I need some advice! My marriage is, for the most part, amazing! I am crazy in love with my husband, and he feels the same way for me. There is one thing I cannot seem to get over. He has a penchant for porn. When I don't think about him lookin...

A.   11 February 2010: See, all you {and many like minded wife}, describe here is what you feel. It is feeling of insecurity, that causes jealousy, quite natural even with male also. So, jealousy is feeling, an automatic response towards some object,event or occasion that ... (read in full...)

I tried to spice up our love life but he was shocked

Q.   Hope you can help and understand what i am asking I am not sure how to write this but hope you can get the jest in what what i am asking. My husband and I have been trying to get our marriage back on track after I found out he had been cheating on...

A.   10 February 2010: I admire your wisdom, formulated by this statement of your,"I have forgiven him for this but not forgotten but accepted that we must look forward and not back" Everything you write in this post is not only great, but truly a IDEALIZED VISION. ... (read in full...)

Why would he want to masturbate instead of having sex with me?

Q.   My boyfriend recently spent the night with me. We got it on before going to sleep and both had a good time. The next morning, we're both sitting up in bed (I was naked, he was in boxers) and watching tv. Next thing I know, he's playing around with ...

A.   10 February 2010: Hi young ! you feel more, for just little things. You both can discuss the issues. And, about masturbation, it is also a type of 'intercourse', just it happen in hand, and not in vagina...but it generate pleasurable energy, which is notable thing. ... (read in full...)

I wish I could be more fun but it feels like hell trying to accomodate each other.

Q.   My boyfriend and I have been together for 2 years but I am seeing a lot of problems so I will have to explain everything I detail. At first our relationship was great. We had great sex we talked and it seemed like it was time to live together, we ...

A.   10 February 2010: Your feeling and knowing is matched with each other, then why are you and for what you keep yourself in confusion? He is socialistic and you are spiritualist, intellectual and quite rational. Be selective about choice. A bad choice into relationship ... (read in full...)

My sex addiction is leaving me spirtually, physically, mentally and financialy exhausted. I need help to stop this!

Q.   Im 28. A husband for 3 years. A father for 2 years. Im a sex addict. I have been for 10years. I use prostitutes. Not so long ago i confessed all to my wife who somehow stuck by me and eventually forgave me. Recently i started again. Crazy thing is i ...

A.   10 February 2010: Your is very interesting and challenging question to answer. I am trying to explain you something, which I hope will guide your thought process correctly. See, sex addition do not means A VERY HIGH SEX DRIVE, WHICH IS ADMIRABLE. A sex addition... (read in full...)

I have no respect for my wife and don't plan on having kids together. How do I tell her?

Q.   Please don't judge me for what I write .... My wife and I have been married for 5 yrs. I love her deeply but I look at her as a whore. We have had a very interesting sex life since meeting, engaging in group sex, 3 sums, public sex and often sw...

A.   10 February 2010: Gentlemen, I love and admire you for listening our well balanced opinion. I note your this statement, 'I will not judge my wife for what we did together , I won't hold that against her,. I just want to put it all behind us thats all." Howev... (read in full...)

Why should I put up with my man looking at porn?

Q.   Ok, why do I just "have to accept" porn in my life? My boyfriend jacks off to porn. Sure, our sex life is great, and believe me I don't mind quickies or gettigng him off without anything in return. But why does he have to look at other naked women? ...

A.   10 February 2010: I want to guide these 'girls' or 'women' who object porn. The real problem is never touched, is the problem of HAVING SEX WITH LOVE. Love is feeling of admiration, acceptance, and at height almost as 'worshiping feeling', about sex itself, ... (read in full...)

Is it bad that we talk about sex? I think he is trying to get in my pants!

Q.   theres this guy that i like and am getting to know.chatting.. and gong on dates with..this guy says he wants to love me..treat me like a princess etc: hes really sweet..and gentleman.. and he keep asking me if i like him and what i think of...

A.   10 February 2010: It is good and even desirable to have sex in relationship. So, be careful in your choice, which you make. Be more selective even giving smile to anyone. Sex is most personal and private thing in life, so take all care that your message should not ... (read in full...)

I am not sexually compatible with my husband. How can I get him to stop being such a prude?

Q.   (Mod Note - OP's own title) I can't say how glad I am to have found this site. I am a 28yo mother of three boys. I have always been very sexual. I can remember masturbating as early as 5 or 6. My first sexual incounter was with the little girl...

A.   10 February 2010: "High sex drive"- in male or in female, is signature also of high intellectual property. Unfortunately, in absence of right knowledge such person have to face lot of social-psychological, and moral problem. I admire your post that describe all the ... (read in full...)

Sexual partners are shocked over how wet I got. Is this normal?

Q.   I'm 18 and recently tried to have a threesome with some friends (that drunk night) They both were shocked at how wet I was; even when not arroused and how smoothe my lips were. Just wondering...is it normal to be that wet or smoothe?...

A.   10 February 2010: You are normal is true, but most profound truth is that you possess god gifted creative talent. I request you to preserve this god's gift. Be careful in choice of your partner, because wrong partner can create lot of psychological trouble by making ... (read in full...)

My boyfriend got another woman pregnant!

Q.   I've been living with my boyfriend for almost 3 years now. A few months ago, I found out that he got his officemate pregnant.She was on her 5th month that time. I know that this is mainly my guys fault, but I found out that the girl knew all along ...

A.   9 February 2010: You are really too civilized, rarer of the rearrest person !!! You also say,'I'd appreciate objective and mature comments" great-triple time. I hope your b/f would have the same one quality of high profile personality. Anyway, I got the impressi... (read in full...)

I have no respect for my wife and don't plan on having kids together. How do I tell her?

Q.   Please don't judge me for what I write .... My wife and I have been married for 5 yrs. I love her deeply but I look at her as a whore. We have had a very interesting sex life since meeting, engaging in group sex, 3 sums, public sex and often sw...

A.   9 February 2010: Be pleased to read this your statement,'We have had a very interesting sex life since meeting, engaging in group sex, 3 sums, public sex and often" To use sex for enjoyment is one thing, and certainly to use sex to have a children is another ... (read in full...)

I'm being abused by my husband but have no where to go. Should I leave or stay?

Q.   hi, my husband has only increased his drinking since our marriage 8 years ago. he has quite grand ideas about himself and considers himself to be a blessing to humanity. He started physically abusing me from the 3rd month of getting married, even ...

A.   9 February 2010: First, be calm and cold and calculative. Your and your childrens life need it from you. Assess all evidence and search for good lawyer. Only good lawyer can help you in the situation you narrate. Don't be traditional female, who happen to say about ... (read in full...)

My fiance tried to sleep with my best friend! Should I leave him?

Q.   http://www.dearcupid.org/question/he-has-lied-and-cheatedand-yet-can-be.html Above is a link to my situation. I am still with my fiance. I am writing this to tell all women to GET OUT when someone cheats. IF you read the above, and think I ...

A.   9 February 2010: Be quick, free yourself from these both: your boyfriend [fiance] and best friend. They both are sailing in the same boat, so let them go, and make your life with better choice. A bad relation can ruin all comfort of life. So please be determinative. ... (read in full...)

Threesome heartbreak...

Q.   Hi. well where can i start, when my bf and i started dating, in the heat of passion i told him i would doing anything for him, even have another women with him. Later on in the relationship i told him i had a threesome with my best friend and her ...

A.   9 February 2010: 'THREESOME' NOT HEART BREAKING, IF YOU DO REALIZE THE POWER OF SEX...This is your heating point,'he wants me their every step of the way. why?' The answer of your 'why?' is here in your this statement,'i am a very sexual person i love sex, i think ... (read in full...)

Threesome heartbreak...

Q.   Hi. well where can i start, when my bf and i started dating, in the heat of passion i told him i would doing anything for him, even have another women with him. Later on in the relationship i told him i had a threesome with my best friend and her ...

A.   8 February 2010: 'IN THE HEAT OF PASSION'...the phrase you used here is most real things. It is in the heat of passion you think about to have sex in threesome, and not in normal condition. Couple is normal condition to enjoy sex. And, for some couple, it is normal ... (read in full...)

How can I stop being so jealous and why am I so jealous with my boyfriend?

Q.   Hello, I am sooooo jealous with my boyfriend, and I dont know why. I Have never been jealouse with any of my past boyfriends. I started being jealous with this boyfriend at the 5 month mark I'd say. We've been together for 9 years now. And I get so...

A.   8 February 2010: You can change your nature by learning few thing about feeling of jealousy. 1. Jealousy is only feeling, and as a feeling it responses quite mechanically, without consulting our logical mind. 2. You should learn to respect the 'LOGIC'. and, in... (read in full...)

What do you men really find a sexy attribute in a woman you want to go long term with?

Q.   Hi so I'm wondering... I'm a nice looking girl so I've been told. I've been in a long relationship now and still happy but curious so a question for the guys. What do you men really find a sexy attribute in a woman you want to go long term with? ...

A.   8 February 2010: You will wonder to learn, but I think only one thing is very sexy in female, it is not body because not even in long terms, but very short terms became more familiar and old, and loss its charms in the eye of lovers, but 'INTELLIGENCE' is very sexy, ... (read in full...)

I found condoms in his jacket but they're NOT ours!!!

Q.   So me and my boyfriend been together for 3 year we have a real rocky past but for the last 4 months I feel like we have really connected. Until I found condoms in is jackets. They're not ours so I confronted him about it and he gave me stupid ...

A.   8 February 2010: Please again read my answer, and you will have the answer of your why? However, I make some elaboration. emotion, which is power of feeling, derived from some values. Values are those, which work to preserve life force. When your logic do not matc... (read in full...)

What is wrong with this guy, ..he seems to have two faces.

Q.   i met the guy called Ray(fake name) at youth club. we got to know each other little bit and bit.then we shared a contact number. we see each other once a week cuz youth club start on friday. ray is friendly,caring and funny guy when he texts ...

A.   8 February 2010: Yes, your cousin is right in judgment. Love is magic, or at least it work like magic. It has power to change the person from bottom to top. Shyness? love do not know anything about shyness. It has power to make some one poet and story writer, or ... (read in full...)

I found condoms in his jacket but they're NOT ours!!!

Q.   So me and my boyfriend been together for 3 year we have a real rocky past but for the last 4 months I feel like we have really connected. Until I found condoms in is jackets. They're not ours so I confronted him about it and he gave me stupid ...

A.   8 February 2010: I choose to answer your 'WHY?' which is very difficult to answer. you ask,"Part of me wants him to stay. I know he should be gone. What he is doing isn't right, why is it so hard for me just to let him go?" This is most puzzling question, when one... (read in full...)

I'm falling in love with her but, well, its complicated...

Q.   Well, my mother started dating a guy I knew from playing poker and he has a daughter that at that time was in a relationship with someone else. After a month or two my mother and now step-father are married and she has become my step-sister. Also, ...

A.   8 February 2010: Your decision to stick to 'foreplay' is good, not from the stand point of religion, as you say,'We have both agreed that there wouldn't be sex (oral was ok) in the relationship before marriage because of religion"...but, from the stand point of ... (read in full...)

I feel guilty and trashy for wanting just sex with my ex.

Q.   Is it bad that I really want to hook up with my ex? We're on friendly basis. We were together for 2 yrs. But lately, all I can think about is just hooking up with him. It's strictly physical. I asked him if he was interested (twice!) and he said yes ...

A.   8 February 2010: Sex in itself is good, even when done with one night stand, but to make sex more intimate, more spiritual, and energetic, loving relation is considered as advisable. By loving mean, in a state of emotional admiration, emotional liking. Now y... (read in full...)

What to do when you were fooled once again?

Q.   (Mod Note - OP's own title) Well, The story is damn long, but I'll keep it simple: I fell in love with a girl that hat a boyfriend. She ended falling in love with me. 2 weeks later her boyfriend broke up, and 3 days after that, we were coming t...

A.   8 February 2010: She deserve nothing, not even your anger... !!! Good man...you have good future, so forget past, and create new future by using present rightfully.... (read in full...)

I'm falling in love with her but, well, its complicated...

Q.   Well, my mother started dating a guy I knew from playing poker and he has a daughter that at that time was in a relationship with someone else. After a month or two my mother and now step-father are married and she has become my step-sister. Also, ...

A.   8 February 2010: The situation before you is serious, in a sense that it is not simple. Second, you are very young, say in your teen. What you feel today is your liking, can be turn out as disliking in short or long time span, and so on and on. So just wait, do not ... (read in full...)

Should I trust him or divorce him?

Q.   We've married for 14 years and no child. Recently I discovered my husband act differently. He started to pay attention on his appearance and he will go jogging with this female co-worker 3 times a week at his work place till 2330 hr. I've requested ...

A.   7 February 2010: You are trusting him, but he is not, When you propose to join them. Now be straight by saying, that anger is not proper response. Ask him, what he want from life and from you?... (read in full...)

Two weeks after I found out I was pregnant, he started acting like all the women want him!

Q.   Im carrying my boyfriends baby, 2 weeks after I found out I was pregnant he started acting like he is the hottest thing alive and that all the women wanted him, and his drinking increased and he wanted me to drive him around, I discussed this with ...

A.   7 February 2010: 'Move out' is only answer or option. Got abortion, if you think it good for you. It is always good to correct mistake. And, it is always fatal to live with mistaken choice.... (read in full...)

Can birth control cause me to become less wet during sex?

Q.   So, I get extremely wet right before sex and during sex and I stay very wet all throughout sex no matter how long the session is (lucky me I guess). I've never had to use any lubrication. But I was wondering if taking birth control can change that? ...

A.   7 February 2010: Oh! sure I misunderstood, but in my mis-understanding, I got chance to remember god...and for that I thank you. well, no problem with birth control. No problem even with 'menopause'. Just preserve good and romantic relationship, rest is god's gr... (read in full...)

I kicked him out and although its very peaceful I am tempted to call him

Q.   Hi. I don't know if you remember me or not, but I was on here some months ago upset because of everything that had happened in my relationship. My husband had threatened to kill himself twice when we were dating, kept making excuses about not buying ...

A.   7 February 2010: I read your question carefully. Read all details related with relationship. There is no mentioning of 'love'. How one can live without love, and with fear? Longer beak, say six month is required to taste, how much you and he really in need of ... (read in full...)

I'm repulsed by sex

Q.   Hello, hopefully somebody reads this. I'd appreciate some kind of feedback on my problem. Before anything, the basics: I am an 18 year old caucasian male I live in Canada I have Obsessive Compulsive Personality Disorder Not sure if that mat...

A.   7 February 2010: I read your question. Your language is good. You think quite logically. So, the root of your problem, which you describe as problem, should be rooted from your family back-ground. It can read as personality dis-order. I have such problem in my child ... (read in full...)

Can birth control cause me to become less wet during sex?

Q.   So, I get extremely wet right before sex and during sex and I stay very wet all throughout sex no matter how long the session is (lucky me I guess). I've never had to use any lubrication. But I was wondering if taking birth control can change that? ...

A.   7 February 2010: "(lucky me I guess). I've never had to use any lubrication."...then what is the point on earth, that force you to think this as 'problem?' and wanted to change !!! You are enjoying sex, so intensely that even 'god' would envied you, if it ever rea... (read in full...)

Why does he constantly pick fights with me? Will he ever change?

Q.   It seems like my bf is constantly picking fights. when we first started dating it was that he had problems with my sexual history (which isnt bad), then it was that he didnt like me talking to any guys even friends, having a facebook account, ...

A.   7 February 2010: ' ITS BEEN 2 YEARS !!!! and you are hoping for change? Most certainly you love him dearly. If your ability to suffer, allow you to sustain this fighting relationship, then I don't think it is that much bad. He may possess some good quality,... (read in full...)

I want to forget about him but I can't!

Q.   I joined this web site so i can post my problem and hopefully get help and also try helping others going thru problems. this is my problem i met this guy we will call him sam* We went out 4 a while about 6 months, during those 6 months we broke ...

A.   7 February 2010: your concept about love and sex and life is required to be clear first, other wise you will live your life in much confusion, and other will use you, means take everything from you, without bothering to return anything to you. Your boy friend, ... (read in full...)

A bad relatioship destroyed my confidence to initiate sex. How can I over come my fear?

Q.   I would like to be able to masterbate in front of my husband, but even after reading all the encouraging comments about it I am still quite nervouse about it. Heck, I cant even ask him for sex when I am in the mood. I'm just not sexually aggressive ...

A.   7 February 2010: Here are my suggestion for revision of your own thought process:1. Do not relate your ' bad relationship' with your sexual act. 2. Relationships is really tools to actualize sexual pleasure, if tools is hurting, then one is bound to replace ... (read in full...)

My husband wont stop watching porn

Q.   My husband of only a year loves to watch porn. I dont think he is addicted to it. But if i leave the house for a long period of time he will sneak off and watch it behind my back. I used to have better self esteem. But ever since i found out about ...

A.   7 February 2010: I am sorry for your bad luck. And, more sorry to see that there is very little hope for you from your husband. He has inbuilt bad nature, so he will never do anything that comfort your life, As a last hope, you should show your stone hard face ... (read in full...)

Why cant I orgasm??

Q.   I have been with my boyfriend for a few months now, I am 19, i have had a couple of previous boyfriends and it has been the same with all of them no matter what position etc i am in.. its not lack of trying!!! I was sexually assaulted when i was 14 ...

A.   7 February 2010: As 'anonymous writers has suggested in last statement, I am to suggest you Tantric sex. here is some essence of ideas: See sex is above and all a 'play'. Love is different. You can say your self, -I love sex {play}- including the partner you choo... (read in full...)

Sex between us isn't like it used to be, help!

Q.   We used to have sex 3 or 4 times a day but within the past year things have gotten so stressful and there's been alot of fights between us. Now we have sex maybe once a week. How can I get us back to where we were?? Also when we do have sex I feel ...

A.   7 February 2010: What you present here as a complaint, is not complaint but a normal pattern in sex life of any couple on earth. But, what make to answer your question is this..."How can I get us back to where we were?? Also when we do have sex I feel like its... (read in full...)

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