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He gets SOOO angry! Is this normal?

Q.   My boyfriend grabbed my head and slammed it against the door. He said that I wouldn't shut up (we were having an argument) and that because I followed him through the house (I was trying to get him to talk / listen) then I tip him over the edge and ...

A.   11 February 2011: I am so glad to hear that. Good luck with your future.... (read in full...)

He gets SOOO angry! Is this normal?

Q.   My boyfriend grabbed my head and slammed it against the door. He said that I wouldn't shut up (we were having an argument) and that because I followed him through the house (I was trying to get him to talk / listen) then I tip him over the edge and ...

A.   10 February 2011: You said you can't help but blame yourself.... this is NOT your fault. It is in NO WAY your fault. It is HIM who cannot control his emotions. No one should get so angry that they hurt their loved ones. People who do, do so because they have a ... (read in full...)

He gets SOOO angry! Is this normal?

Q.   My boyfriend grabbed my head and slammed it against the door. He said that I wouldn't shut up (we were having an argument) and that because I followed him through the house (I was trying to get him to talk / listen) then I tip him over the edge and ...

A.   10 February 2011: You said you can't help but blame yourself.... this is NOT your fault. It is in NO WAY your fault. It is HIM who cannot control his emotions. No one should get so angry that they hurt their loved ones. People who do, do so because they have a ... (read in full...)

Marriage or master's degree, which should come first?

Q.   Please advice me, I am 25 male, handsome, working as economic analyst, but want to have my master within 2 0r 3 years, but same time want to marry....should i do master first and then marry or i should marry and then go for masters.... i...

A.   4 February 2011: I would say do the masters first, while you are young. Get your education out of the way, then look for a wife, that is if you don't already have a fiance. If you do have someone in mind to marry, and you are both ready, I don't see why you can't do ... (read in full...)

My wife told me how much she liked having sex with her ex!

Q.   Before my wife and I were together, she had a boyfriend that she lost her virginity to (at 16). She really liked him. She had a relationship with him that included regular sex, then after breaking up got back together after a couple of months ...

A.   21 January 2011: Perhaps she was aware that you would feel the way you do now, if she told you the details and her feelings around the sex she had with her ex? Perhaps, with you being a virgin, she felt that you would judge her past actions and not fully understand ... (read in full...)

What does a woman feel when she rejects a guy?

Q.   What does a woman feel when she rejects? Contempt for the guy who tries? A sense of guilt? Pity? Or maybe she has very little thought of why? Or maybe she feels superior? Does she ever think that she may hurt the man? Does she ever think abo...

A.   21 January 2011: It would totally depend on the situation and the relationship the woman has to the man making the advance. Myself, I always feel sad about rejecting a guy. I feel flattered that they have shown an interest in me and sorry to have to turn them down ... (read in full...)

I keep falling into passionate platonic relationships!

Q.   Dear Cupid, I've been noticing a trend I have of falling into "passionate platonic relationships" with certain men. It's not that I'm not attracted to men in general, but the ones who really trigger me emotionally end up being platonic friends...

A.   14 January 2011: I have experienced similar, although I have now found someone whom I have strong friendship feelings for and romantic feelings. I have also grown very close to few guys in the past, and if I'm honest, I wanted it to be something more, but I felt... (read in full...)

What 'unknown' condition could it be that stops a girl from having sex?

Q.   I was recently speaking to my girlfriend about sex, and she kind of let slip that she 'until recently' couldn't actually have sex because of a medical condition. She said only that is was apparently not that rare, and now it is fine (presumably ...

A.   13 January 2011: Could just be thrush. Very common and would not be nice to have sex with a case of that. Could have been some kind of infection or Endometriosis, which is pretty common and could have required some kind of operation. But we can't really tell you ... (read in full...)

What is the source of a girl's attractiveness?

Q.   OK, I had an interesting experience recently. There has been a girl who is stunningly beautiful and very sexy whom I have known. She is always being sought after by guys. But I got to know her with no physical contact, in a friendly way. I ...

A.   13 January 2011: Yup! This is the difference between inner and outer beaty. Some people appear very attractive on the surface, but this masks an ugly interior. While other people who may not appear special at first, are truly wonderful, beautiful people inside. That ... (read in full...)

I suspect a student is dating a lecturer, should I report it?

Q.   I am a student at university and I think one of my friends is having an affiar with a lecturer. I have asked her and she says she is not but I don't believe her. They are always together around campus and I am sure I have seen them flirting. Like he ...

A.   12 January 2011: To the OP, what things are you worried he will let slip about other pupils? As a lecturur there are rules of confidentiality that must be followed so he would not be allowed to give such information to anyone, not even a girlfriend. I feel your ... (read in full...)

From phone to meeting in person: how can I make it natural, not awkward?

Q.   Hello all! I've been talking to a guy for nearly 3 years on the phone. I just wondered when we do meet in person how can I make it where the situation won't be so awkward?...

A.   11 January 2011: Hi! Try not to worry about it. That's the best thing to do! It is more than likely going to be awkward, it is just an awkward situation! If youve known someone for so long but never seen them in the flesh, it will feel very starnge the first time ... (read in full...)

I suspect a student is dating a lecturer, should I report it?

Q.   I am a student at university and I think one of my friends is having an affiar with a lecturer. I have asked her and she says she is not but I don't believe her. They are always together around campus and I am sure I have seen them flirting. Like he ...

A.   11 January 2011: If you are her friend, don't mention it to anyone before you talk to her about it. You have betrayed her trust by reading her emails so it would not be good to tell other people about what you read. As far as I know it is not illegal for a stud... (read in full...)

New to dating, what should I do about my cheating boyfriend?

Q.   I woke up the other morning to my boyfriend of 7 months alarm on his phone which is normal. I reached over to turn it off. I don't know how commom it is but sometimes when things are kindda fishy I get really bothered. And it just so happened that I ...

A.   11 January 2011: Jeez, what an idiot he is! He obviously thinks it's cool to have a girlfriend and still see other girls as well, as long as he doesn't get caught. Some people just have no problem being dishonest as long as they are having fun. He probably even gets ... (read in full...)

Is it normal to want to have sex at 14?

Q.   i am 14 year old boy. Sometimes i feel like i want to have sex even though i am 14 :/ is this just my hormones or something else. I don't feel comfortable talking about this to my mom or dad can anyone help ?...

A.   11 January 2011: Good on you! That is the right attitude.... (read in full...)

Controlling mother becoming too much for me.

Q.   I've been having problems with my mother since I was a child, she's extremely controlling and it's becoming worse in the last few years. My mam has brought me up as a single parent for all my life and we've always lived with my elderly grandmot...

A.   10 January 2011: Hi there. I really feel for you and your situation. You are clearly a good person and I know you must care for and love your mum and your grandmother, despite the difficulties you describe, to stay in the situation you are in. The feeling I get is... (read in full...)

Is it normal to want to have sex at 14?

Q.   i am 14 year old boy. Sometimes i feel like i want to have sex even though i am 14 :/ is this just my hormones or something else. I don't feel comfortable talking about this to my mom or dad can anyone help ?...

A.   9 January 2011: To the anonymous person, I think he's british not american, there's a british flag by his name :s. To the OP, honestly, there is nothing wrong with you. Please don't think that there is. Your thoughts will create your reality, so believe that you ... (read in full...)

Is this age difference acceptable?

Q.   The girl im in love with is 14, and im 18... Are these feelings i have too much of an age difference?? And im not sure if it is ok to act on said feelings.. Any advice would be awesome..........

A.   9 January 2011: The age difference in itself is not much, BUT as you are both teenagers and she is under the age of consent it is too much. She is legally a child and you are not. This will reflect badly on you if you start a relationship with her, in the society ... (read in full...)

Is it normal to want to have sex at 14?

Q.   i am 14 year old boy. Sometimes i feel like i want to have sex even though i am 14 :/ is this just my hormones or something else. I don't feel comfortable talking about this to my mom or dad can anyone help ?...

A.   9 January 2011: Don't worry! It's completely normal. This is because your body is changing from a child's to a sexually mature adult. This means you will have the desire to try out your new abilities so to speak. If we were animals who didn't have a conscience, now ... (read in full...)

What's the best way to support my girlfriend after she was raped and hospitalized?

Q.   hello everyone, i seriously need your help. my girlfriend is in hospital for over a week now, some guy tried to rape her and she got physically and mentally hurt. It's really hard typing this but i don't know what to do, i wanna support her, i wanna ...

A.   8 January 2011: I am so sorry to hear that this has happened to your girlfriend. I can't imagine what either of you must be going through. I hear that you feel her pain and want to take it away somehow and show her that you will be there. All you can do is be ... (read in full...)

My boyfriend wants me to lose weight!

Q.   Help! My boyfriend has a problem with my weight. I think I'm pretty hot though, and not overweight at all. I am 5'6 and weigh 132 lbs. His problem is, I've gained weight since we've been together. When we first met, I was a professional dancer and ...

A.   8 January 2011: Good for you for standing up to him and calling him out on this. Sounds like he's realised he can't control you and you're not a pushover. Sounds like he realises you've figured out his game and is trying to pretend he didn't mean what he said. ... (read in full...)

My friends are trying to convince me the age gap is a problem

Q.   I'm 20 and my current boyfriend is 33, we've been together for 10 months or so. We met via work (we play pro badminton) and I used to play mixed doubles for a little while before we got together, which is where we initially got to know each other. (...

A.   7 January 2011: Just tell them! Next time they say something bad about the age gap tell them it's not their place to comment. Say you are happy and if they were real friends they would not judge you but accept you for who you are and respect the choices you make. ... (read in full...)

My friends are trying to convince me the age gap is a problem

Q.   I'm 20 and my current boyfriend is 33, we've been together for 10 months or so. We met via work (we play pro badminton) and I used to play mixed doubles for a little while before we got together, which is where we initially got to know each other. (...

A.   7 January 2011: Hey! My boyfriend is 16 years older than me. Reading your post your relationship has similarities to mine. Despite the age gap, we connect on an emotional level and act like kids together, you know, we bring out the playful, silly side in each ... (read in full...)

I contacted my LDR BF through a fake profile to see what he's up to

Q.   I did something I probably shouldn't do...sigh! Now I need some advice! My LDR boyfriend is on a travel site which has a setting that looks exactly like match.com (one to one, not a forum), in fact I think it's a combination of dating and meeti...

A.   7 January 2011: Hey, I read your other 2 posts CO dirtball. Think of it this way, he's paid the $150 so it's fair enough for him to want to continue to use the service, He has changed his status to 'involved' so it is not like he is advertising himself as a single ... (read in full...)

My boyfriend wants me to lose weight!

Q.   Help! My boyfriend has a problem with my weight. I think I'm pretty hot though, and not overweight at all. I am 5'6 and weigh 132 lbs. His problem is, I've gained weight since we've been together. When we first met, I was a professional dancer and ...

A.   6 January 2011: No you are not wrong. So you have put on 7lb? That's nothing! Half a stone is not a big change in weight. It does not pose a risk to your health nor will it make a big change to your appearance. You still dance so you will still be fit and ... (read in full...)

Making Long Distance Relationships work....any pointers??

Q.   hi all.. basically I am just wanting some peoples opinons on LDR's..I am relativly inexperienced on the relationship front anywyas but have hit it off with this guy who lives quiet far away from me ( we were initally friends and things have ...

A.   6 January 2011: I've been in a LDR for nearly 3 years now. I'd say the best thing to do is to make sure you set dates in the future when you can meet up. It is one thing speaking on the phone or the internet but you need to be physically together to make it work, ... (read in full...)

For the girls: Is an uncircumcised penis a deal breaker?

Q.   Is an uncircumcised penis a deal breaker? Only for women...

A.   5 January 2011: Hell no! Not at all. The only reasons I can see for someone to find it a deal breaker is for religion(the cause of so many of life's disagrements) or because she is shallow or immature. Any normal, down to earth, sensible woman would not consider ... (read in full...)

Should I forge ahead with my psychologist career, and ignore my heart? Or chase my dream of being an actress?

Q.   Hi. I don't have a relationship question, it's more of a life question. But I read this site everyday, and people seem to be very helpful. I need some advice. I am 18 and in my first year of college. This is normally when people figure out what the...

A.   5 January 2011: I agree with CaringGuy. It would be a good idea to finish your degree and get qualified. It's always worth going after your dreams. But remember a dream may not always turn out to be as good as we imagine. Best thing to do is try it out! As alre... (read in full...)

What do you think of this as a Valentine's Day gift idea?

Q.   Valentines Idea Basically I really want to do something special for my crush. I know its elaborate but I wanted to do something different. I wondered what you girls (And guys) thought of it and how it'd make you feel. I was thinking of the ...

A.   4 January 2011: Ooh yeh, if she is not actually your girlfriend this might be a bit much. A sweet idea, but if she doesn't feel the same way it could put her in an awkward possition. She could feel overwhelmed and feel like she owed you. If you really like this... (read in full...)

What do you think of this as a Valentine's Day gift idea?

Q.   Valentines Idea Basically I really want to do something special for my crush. I know its elaborate but I wanted to do something different. I wondered what you girls (And guys) thought of it and how it'd make you feel. I was thinking of the ...

A.   3 January 2011: It sounds like a really sweet, thoughtful idea. Very romantic. If she's the kind of girl who likes that kind of thing, I can't see why she wouldn't love it! Even if she's not into hearts and flowers she would certainly be touched by the thought and ... (read in full...)

What should I think about his many, many pet names for me?

Q.   My boyfriend rarely calls me by name...he has many, many nicknames for me. One day, he saw me with hair beyond poofy and he grins, and calls me a little llama :p Stuff like that...he only says my real name when in public...still rare. Why? I also ...

A.   3 January 2011: He sounds like a sweetie. He calls you sweet names because you have a special place in his heart. You are more than (insert your real name)to him, you are his girlfriend, his little llama, his angel etc etc. Why does he call you all these nicknames? ... (read in full...)

Sparks and excitement but unreliable guy VS boring but stable and committed guy.

Q.   If you had a choice, what would you pick? A relationship where you feel a lot of sparks, there is a lot of physical attraction, and there is a lot of passion and excitement. BUT where the partner is unreliable and has so much baggage that you...

A.   24 December 2010: I would go with neither. I'm a dreamer but I think the person you choose to be with for life, to marry, should be both reliable, completely committed and trustworthy, whilst also being passionate, exciting, physically attractive and have sparks ... (read in full...)

She has a male best friend AND a boyfriend--how is it possible?

Q.   The other day I met a young woman at a party. She was talking about how she was leaving soon, and her friend was picking her up. "He's coming in 15 minutes," she said. I was sort of interested in her, so I asked, "Oh, is that your boyfriend?" "...

A.   24 December 2010: Same. I have loads of guy friends. I am a bit of a tomboy so that could be a reason for this. But yes it is possible to be really close to a guy but not feel romantically for them. Same as a girl best friend but a guy lol. And yes a partner should ... (read in full...)

Is it cheating to self masterbate in front of a massage parlor attendant?

Q.   Is it cheating to self masterbate in front of a massage parlor attendant? She offered to do it but I wasn't comfortable with letting her. She encouraged me to finish myself. I enjoyed the experience, but i'm feeling the guilt....

A.   24 December 2010: Personally, yes. I feel if you have a partner then anything sexual you do is to be shared with them, no one else. Masturbation is the exception, but you shared the act with another woman, in the flesh. I would consider this crossing the line. You ha... (read in full...)

I have not been interested in sex in about 10 years

Q.   I have not been interested in sex in about 10 years; I am 44 and have been married 15 years. It started when our kids were young. I have tried hormones (pill and even testosterone) and I am simply not interested. Anyone else in my age group have ...

A.   24 December 2010: Hi. I just want to add that I don't believe this is a gender issue, but an individual one. My partner is 41, male, and he is exactly the same as you. He has told me that he would be happy to never have to have sex again. He has been this way for a ... (read in full...)

I feel dead towards her now, but I don't know what to do because of our baby girl....

Q.   well hello there. i got a problem. so mostly the problem is that i have a baby. if i didnt have a beautiful redhead 7 month old little blue eyed toothless princess then i wouldnt be in this predicament. ive dated baby mama for about 3 year...

A.   21 December 2010: It does sound like a big pickle! To be honest it sounds like there is not much love lost between you guys. You are both seeing other people or if not flirting with other people and using this as a way to wind each other up. You are both young and ... (read in full...)

I was sick and having hallucinations! Is this normal?

Q.   I got sick the other day and began having these sick hallucinations. They were awesome, lol, but I was a little afraid my mind had been pushed to its limit like that by a simple cold (severe though it was). Is this normal? Has it happened to anyon...

A.   20 December 2010: Yes completely normal. You probably have the flu. Bad fever and the flu can induce hallucinations. It has nothing to do with madness so don't worry. Only worry if they continue long after you have recovered from your illness. I had the flu last ... (read in full...)

He doesn't want normal sex with me, but he can have cyber sex with other women!

Q.   My story is kind of long so please bear with me. There is just so much I don't know where to start. I am going to try to make it as simple as possible. I've been with my boyfriend for over a year now. From the start he was never intrested in ...

A.   6 December 2010: Jilly's advice is spot on. What is he giving you? You sound like the perfect girlfriend and he gets all this without having to lift a finger until he feels like it. It's very sad but sometimes nice people don't get their needs met in life beca... (read in full...)

I'm so confused about everything in my life and feel the clock ticking away!

Q.   Hi, I'll keep this short. I just don't know what to do. I'm about to turn 30 next week and freaking out! I am pretty (although look 19 which I hate, as no one ever thinks I'm 30, so never get taken seriously) Anyway I'm single after 2 very bad...

A.   4 December 2010: Some great answers from the others. I agree with DrPsych, a PGCE would be a very useful qualification to have. Even if you decide you don't want to teach afterwards, it will give you transferrable skills that employers will recognise as a PGCE is a ... (read in full...)

How can I make my teacher remember me?

Q.   He is my teacher. We have an age difference of about 20 yrs (I'm 18 and he's around 40), and he's married with two kids. I study in this same school for my whole secondary school life (as the 6th-12th grades in your place), and he teaches senior f...

A.   4 December 2010: It sounds like you have a crush on him. I don't mean this to say it is unimportant, I am sure you're feeling are strong and it sounds like you really respect this guy and look up to him. I am glad you are not thinking of things like replacing his ... (read in full...)

I feel trapped in this relationship but unsure if I want the other one back...

Q.   My head is a total mess and I really don't know what to do any more. My ex and I broke up about two months ago (we were together eighteen months) and I'm now in a relationship with another guy, which is what I guess most people would call a rebound....

A.   3 December 2010: I think you answered your own question... I think maybe you need time alone. It sounds like you are pretty confused about your feelings right now. You are caught between two relationships, a recently passed one that isn't quite finalised yet and ... (read in full...)

Why do I miss my ex-boyfriend as much as I miss my girlfriend?

Q.   I broke up with my boyfriend of 18 months this time last year, after I moved away to university. I felt that I didn't love him any more and that I wanted to live life and experiment. I met a girl on a night out and we hit it off and became really ...

A.   3 December 2010: Perhaps it could be something to do with the fact you broke up with him this time last year. And now that you broke up with your girlfriend(before getting back together) this could have brought back the memory of the break up with your ex? Has this ... (read in full...)

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