I'm afraid he isn't as serious as I thought he was about us
Q. I've just become exclusive with a guy I've been seeing on and off for the last 12 months. He's told me he loves me and I'm the only one it just took him a while to realize it. I was at a friends tonight who was on her dating site and I saw his prof...
A. 28 September 2012: Were you aware he had this dating profile information out there? Maybe you should create a "fake" profile and see f you can "meet" him on line to see how he acts, what he says and how he conducts himself. Then you'll know. But P.S you can't tell ... (read in full...)
Why does she lie about her past?
Q. My girlfriend, now my wife, had only two sexual partners before we met. I’m several years, 17 in fact, older than her and we now have a young son. She told me about her previous boyfriends without me asking. The first one, a very bad experience for ...
A. 28 September 2012: I don't think she's hiding anything devious, I think she's conveniently forgetting a bad memory. Maybe she's blocked parts of it out. Or this seems like the best answer to avoid more questions from you. I think she probably remembers whether he came ... (read in full...)
Do these kind of men ever change???
Q. for about 6 months now, this married man and i have been fooled around. i have developed a lot of feeling for him. he lives away from me, so i only get to see him once or twice a month. recently ive learned that there are several other women hes ...
A. 28 September 2012: No they never change. But you can. Stop seeing him. Stop being available when he blows into town for his next pitstopl. You're better than that! Do you really want to be someone's second best?........ (read in full...)
I have very very strong feelings for a guy at work, but he's my manager.
Q. I have very very strong feelings for a guy at work. But he's my manager. For the past 3 years I have been crazy about him. I have tried my best to hide it. After all, it's not fair for someone to feel that kind of pressure. After the first year of ...
A. 28 September 2012: Maybe it's time to switch jobs. You are stuck in an endless vortex that is taking you no where. You can't even see the obvious possibility that you should be dating someone outside your office altogether. The waters are way too muddy where you work ... (read in full...)
I saw a picture he had drawn for an ex and it hurt me, how do I feel more secure about the past?
Q. Me and my boyfriend use online art sites because we both love drawing and makings things and both of us have online galleries where we share our art with friends. I was looking through my boyfriends gallery and looked at a piece that was from 6 ...
A. 26 September 2012: I'd like to say with maturity comes a certain amount of tolerance, but really that's just crap. Yes you do have to get over this since it was in the past, but your feelings are yours and you can't just program yourself not to feel certain things ... (read in full...)
Anal sex makes me feel like I'm being ripped in half!
Q. Hey everyone i have a question, my husband and i decided that we want to try anal, we use a lott of lub and go nice and slow but i cant stand the pain it just makes me want to scream. It feels like im being ripped in half, hes being patient with me ...
A. 26 September 2012: Yeah, here's a suggestion; don't have anal sex anymore. He'll get over it.... (read in full...)
Why is he ignoring my requests to return my things?
Q. Hi there. I had been dating a man for just over a year. We had spoken of getting married ETC. He suffers from depression therefore it was not uncommon for him to be distant sometimes. A few months ago he told me that he would like to leave things ...
A. 26 September 2012: He's not sure he wants it to be completely o-v-e-r. That is my guess. He wanted some distance. Maybe some space. But he's not ready to let go of your things because that seems too final. Like there will be no going back once those things are gone. ... (read in full...)
Am I over reacting to the constant texts and calls
Q. Boyfriend constantly texting and calling another woman.... Please help, i have been with my partner for 4years and to be honest it hasnt been easy, after the 1st year he dumped me as he had feelings for a female friend. we got back together a...
A. 20 September 2012: I would leave him. He can't be trusted. He still has feelings for her and obviously she's more important because he's putting way more energy into those texts than into you. ... (read in full...)
His behaviour and attitudes are unsettling. Should I leave him while I can?
Q. Before we married, my husband was really into me (always holding my hand, kissing - being intimate in every way but no actual sex). I thought our honeymoon would be non-stop, but over the course of 10 days we had sex maybe five times. I was very...
A. 20 September 2012: Tell me again why you got married in the first place? Did you know him longer than 30 days? Because he seems like a slime ball in my opinion. What guy behaves like this to his wife? Even if he "thought" your friend was hot, no man should ever tell ... (read in full...)
Is my boyfriend using my negativity as a stalling tactic?
Q. My boyfriend and I are in our mid forties and we have each been married (and divorced) once. He for over 10 years...me for over 5 years. We have been dating for a year and a half. We talk about marriage. We talk about where we will live. W...
A. 20 September 2012: OMG he has ADD really bad. He proably needs to be on medications. It's not you sweetie, trust me. It's him. It's all him. But good luck convincing him of this. If he doesn't see the problem, he won't be willing to get help and you will have to deal ... (read in full...)
How can I tell my parents that when I finish university I want to take up the guitar professionally? They will have to pay $40,000 a year for me to do so.....
Q. Hi, this isn't a relationship question but I'd really like some outside opinions on this problem. I am currently attending university, studying criminology and going into my 3rd year. However back when I started 1st year I had started to play ...
A. 18 September 2012: Woe, woe, woe, before you go down that path with your folks, you need to actually do something with your music. Not only is life the best teacher of music, but it will grow your musicianship and your talent. You still have alot to learn and forking ... (read in full...)
The proposal - Advice please ladies!
Q. Hi all, I have been in a loving relationship with my girlfriend for a number of years now and wish to make a marriage proposal.. I just wish to make this as special for her as possible, because she deserves it! I intend on proposing to her w...
A. 18 September 2012: By all means go with Plan #2. Women need to choose the ring of their dream, and no matter how good your taste is, you will fail in the area if you choose it for her. But I like the fact that you are putting so much effort into this decision and ... (read in full...)
Is he right about the meaning of my tattoo?
Q. I have a yin and yang symbol on my wrist, a tattoo. But when the guy i'm seeing noticed it he said he didn't like it because it meant I believe in satan and it's quite emo? I said no, it means balance that everything has an equal an opposite reac...
A. 18 September 2012: Don't regret the tattoo. If he cares about you he'll get over his narrow minded version of what it means. And since when do we always have to be the one to regrets and apologizes for everything a man doesn't like? There's nothing wrong with your ... (read in full...)
How do I get my boyfriend to take responsibility for what he did?
Q. I broke up with my boyfriend a couple of days ago because he got violent and went for me repeatadly. now hes claiming that i attacked him....i was sober as a judge and remember everything, he was drunk and admits it though says if i fight like a man ...
A. 18 September 2012: You can't. But you can commend yourself for uncovering his dark secret. He's a closet alcoholic, who drinks in excess, treats his loved ones poorly and then never accepts responsibility for his actions. You should definatey move on. Taking him back ... (read in full...)
I cant stay over with the guy I'm seeing because I'm scared of him seeing me without make up! Help!
Q. so i've been seeing this guy and I can't stay the night with him because i'm worried about the morning after. I'm not naturally pretty, he always goes on about how beautiful and gorgeous I am... which just makes me insecure about wearing no to ...
A. 18 September 2012: Well you could sneak out of bed a hour before he normaly wakes up, slide into the bathroom, wash your face, put on just the very lightest amount of sheer foundation and a very, very light dusting of blush. No eye-liner, no mascara but just a hint of ... (read in full...)
I got my girlfriend mixed up with her twin sister and tried to get on with her. Should I tell my girlfriend?
Q. I was drunk one day after a party and a friend dropped me off at my girlfriends house. Not knowing my girlfriends twin sister was in the house i tried it on with her thinking she was my girlfriend. At the time i really couldn't tell the difference ...
A. 14 September 2012: Seriously? You must have been totally drunk. Yes, you should come clean and tell her the truth. Her sister will eventually. She's just waiting for the right time. The news will sit much better coming from you.... (read in full...)
I think we are dating but not exclusive. Do I have a right to be mad at him kissing another girl?
Q. I have been seeing this guy for a month, we have been mainly making out and cuddling A LOT, we have spent a bit of time together outside of each others houses though. I found out from a friend that her friend kissed him last week at a college party. ...
A. 14 September 2012: Do you have the right to be angry? The heart wants what the heart wants. You cannot deny your feelings. Do you have the right to tell him angry you are? Probably not. But in all honesty, you should have a "talk" with him about your relationship ... (read in full...)
I no longer enjoy sex with my fiance
Q. Please help. Im 23yrs old been with my fiancee 3 yrs we have kids. I do not enjoy sex at all. I think the problem is i cant get horny or wet. It used to be that i would get horny and we would have sex and sometimes id love it and sometimes i would ...
A. 11 September 2012: Women take so much more work to have sex than men. Buy yourself a good lubricant, maybe one of those flavored ones and when he gets in the mood, juice yourself up. The reason is this, when you're dry it will never feel good when he strokes or rubs ... (read in full...)
This married man suddenly ignores me
Q. HEY i feel confused i started talking to this married man and we started meeting up and he used to call and text me. the other day we were to meet up and unfortunatley he had to wait for me as i was talking to my friend because she appeard and i co...
A. 11 September 2012: You don't need to worry about ending it with him, it sounds like he already has. You just need to keep busy, change your number, start going out with your friends and try to get him out of your head. He's married. He has a wife. Maybe they ... (read in full...)
I told him I love him but he said he would never love me
Q. i met a guy 2 months ago on a dating site. we agreed we were only going to be friends with benefits. but now i am in love with him but he says he will never love me. we have seen each other 16 times now and thats alot. i give him blow jobs and we h...
A. 11 September 2012: Why does your story make me want to ask you if he leaves you money on the dresser when your night is over with? Because that's how he's treating you, like a high paid hooker. You have got to stop wasting time with this man. He's an empty shell. He ... (read in full...)
I'm troubled by my boyfriend's new female roommate
Q. Should I be worried about my boyfriend's female roommate? My boyfriend of 15 months has a new female roommate, she moved in about a week ago. He's had female roommates before and it has NEVER bothered me. BUT this girl is different. She's a flirt (j...
A. 11 September 2012: Tell me again why you're not the room mate in this situation and she is?......You are right, if a guy is the type who's going to cheat he will. On the other hand, even the most faithful guy can be overwhelmed with the temptation when it's knocking ... (read in full...)
Should I trust him to make the right decisions?
Q. Thank you for taking the time and reading this... I have been with my bf for 3 years now and we have had our ups and downs. When we first started dating I didn't put effort into the relationship due to finding out my mother was diagnosed with c...
A. 11 September 2012: Oh honey I so think you are being played by this guy and every time he has managed to talk his way out of the situation and back into your heart. He's not going to Vegas for a friend's wedding and if he is, I'd say "Hell no, you cannot trust him." ... (read in full...)
Why do people find me odd?
Q. Hy. I feel different right now as to what s wrong with me? Many people(especially my relatives) find my behaviour/personality odd. Really. .i dont know why they think im a bit strange. Im a nice person, caring, dont take any illegal substances, ...
A. 9 September 2012: Quiet people are frequently misunderstood. Because you're not overly social, this puzzles most people because most people need to be around others, need to do things with others and a good number of people are really afraid to spend time by ... (read in full...)
Should I be scared about talking to random guys in a bar? Recent events have scared me
Q. Hi, I was in a very strange situation tonight. I was just out for some leaving dinner and drinks for a friend who is emigrating.. There was a few of us, we went to a bar after dinner, i got talking 'having banter' with a guy at the bar, and late...
A. 9 September 2012: Here's what I would do. Always go with a group of your friends. And never have more than one drink. You can drink heavily back at home, but when you're out you need to have your wits about you, be aware of your surroundings, be aware of the vibe of ... (read in full...)
How should handle really rude, mean nasty insensitive aunt?
Q. Last time I saw my aunt, I was in tears from being cruelly dumped by my boyfriend at the time. She ignored this at and proceeded to have a huge go at me for not futhering my education. I wasn't in the mood and depressed. Instead she yelled at me...
A. 9 September 2012: How about if you don't see her again. Ever. Why should you? They can't make you entertain her company. If they insist on going to see her, just don't go. Find other things to do with your time. Why be tortured? She's rude and heartless. Don't waste ... (read in full...)
What can I do about the unwanted gift my mother in law gave me? It disturbed my husband and I. What was I supposed to do?
Q. I'm in a situation that I'm not sure whether was a nice gesture or something very strange/kind of disturbing. I'm not sure how to prevent future uncomfortable incidents without hurting my mother-in-law's feelings. Some background info might be ne...
A. 9 September 2012: Your in-laws live in a nudist colony and the worst thing about this story was the gift she gave you? Put it in a box and store it in the attic or donate it to Goodwill, or throw it away. Just because she gave it to you doesn't mean you have to keep ... (read in full...)
Is my wifes best friend playing games?
Q. Over the last few months my wifes bestfriend has been going through a divorce. My wife and i have known this women for around ten years now and over those years have given her the support she needs during her rocky marriage, through texting, phone ...
A. 9 September 2012: As I read your post, I started wondering who was more obsessed with this situation, the divorced friend or you? Here's a suggestion, you stated that this woman has been sort of avoiding you guys and not really coming around anymore. I think that's ... (read in full...)
Sex with my well endowed boyfriend is painful
Q. What can I do? My boyfriend is really large n when had sex it hurt so bad that I barely could breathe, its where he is too big n Im a lil small! I havent been sexually active in awhile n maybe I will get use to it but we tried again n it got so b...
A. 8 September 2012: Lubricant, lubricant, lubricant. I was married to a guy like this and I thought, like you, I would eventually get used to it but I never did and we were married for 10 years it was painful every time and I eventually hated having sex with him. There ... (read in full...)
I unfortunatley set up a pattern where I do the majority of the calling to my BF and am now trying to undo it and it not working!
Q. Dear all, Please advise. I unfortunatley set up a pattern where I do the majority of the calling to my BF and am now trying to undo it and it not working!! For instance - I saw him last week - all was ok, then I did not hear from him so called hi...
A. 6 September 2012: Simple. Next time you want to do something with him make the offer and then tell him firmly to call you for all the details If he tries to turn the tables just be firm and say, "No, I think this time you need to be the one to call me for a change." ... (read in full...)
15 year old pupil is hitting on me - her teacher. Should I report this?
Q. I am in a terribly difficult situation. I have been teaching for 20 years and this is the first I’ve ever had this particular problem. There is a girl in one of my classes; she is very young, 14/15 years old, a child. Now I have had students have ...
A. 6 September 2012: You are so being played and this will end your career. You should definately report her or find another job.... (read in full...)
He wants me to change my title from Mrs to Ms. Should I, and how do I do it?
Q. My husband is very keen and really wants me to change my title from Mrs. to Ms. He says it is much more sexy. What do others think about this, as I am fairly OK with it, but not totally sure. How would I go about effecting this change? ...
A. 28 August 2012: If you are married you shouldn't formally or legally change yourself to Ms. But when you go to the doctor's office, or other places you can refer to yourself as Ms Maureen. You didn't really say how long you've been married to him, so I wonder why ... (read in full...)
How do I deal with my BF's ex wife?
Q. I don't really know where to start... I have been dating my boyfriend for almost a year and a half, we moved in together after a year and I have never been happier in my life. This relationship is the strongest, most fulfilling relationship I have ...
A. 28 August 2012: Yep your man has a bad case of the ex-wife syndrome. Tell me again why they got divorced in the first place when clearly they are still way too connected and sorry it's not just for the kids anymore. Secondly it's time for you to start telling him ... (read in full...)
Any pointers on how to respond to mothers on menopause?
Q. My mom has had menopause for two years now, and it is getting progressively worse. She is very sensitive to medicine, so hormones are out of the question. Problem is that she treats me like trash, she starts nagging me about everything and a...
A. 28 August 2012: I'm afraid this is not normal menopause. She must be having other problems. Either that or she is using the whole "menopause" thing to say what she really wants with no restraint or regard for anyone else's feelings. You may want to talk to her ... (read in full...)
I still love her. We have a child together. How can I get over the fact that she has rejected me? It hurts.
Q. Hello all Last April my partner of 7 years suddenly broke off our relationship, saying she no longer felt happy. She had been going to see a therapist about her life in general, and ending our relationship seemed to be part of what she felt sh...
A. 20 August 2012: If she's not talking about getting back together I wouldn't push that envelope with her. If you are honest with yourself, you are probably more in love with the illusion the relationship represented, but given her personality and the magnitude of ... (read in full...)
How not to be a nagging girlfriend
Q. I've realized I tend to look a lot at flaws in my boyfriend instead of looking and focusing in the good things. I remember that with my first boyfriend, everything was perfect (this was four years ago). After a very sad and painful breakup, I had ...
A. 20 August 2012: I suspect you are picking men who are beneath you. Thus the temptation to constantly make them better plagues you. You are obviously attracted to men who seem like a "project" to you. For one thing you won't feel the need to compete with them for ... (read in full...)
After my car accident I am suffering from anxiety but my husband is pulling away. Am I overreacting?
Q. I recently was in an auto accident. Ended up being my fault because my foot was wet and slipped off the brake. Thankfully, no one was hurt. Also, a month ago my cousin was killed in an auto accident just outside of town. I am struggling with ...
A. 20 August 2012: I do think you are overracting a bit for such a small wreck. However it's not really the wreck that's troubling you, but the fact that you've lost a family member fairly recently and it was sort of a wake up call. You are realizing your life is half ... (read in full...)
How do I get my mom to send me to a mental ward?
Q. Lately depression has been taking control again, it's been really hard to fight it again. I've always been a negative person, which makes it harder for me to deal with depression, or the begining of it even. I'm happy, usually a while in a day, but ...
A. 20 August 2012: You just need a good therapist or counselor. You certainly don't want to go to a mental ward. You will be crazy when you come out of that place. If your Mom doesn't want to sign you up, go see your school guidance counselor, they'll know what to do. ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend got very violent during our play fight. What does this mean?
Q. I got back with my boyfriend yesterday after we had been having some troubles. At the moment things seem better than ever but something very i don't know ? Out of the blue happened today. My boyfriend has recently been kicked o...
A. 20 August 2012: Note to self, next time to invite him to play fight and clearly once he starts punching you don't keep carrying on out of curiousity because you're just as sick as he is. You could have stopped it and you didn't you just kept going so I'm thinking ... (read in full...)
I'm worried one argument has changed his mind about me.
Q. Hello, I am in a very confused state because of a man I am currently dating. We live in different cities. He is 40 (I am 30) and has recently divorced (seperated for 3 years). The relationship has been great and we are obviously crazy about each...
A. 8 August 2012: Couples who really care about each other don't break up over one fight. Even the happiest couples will have conflicts, miscommunications; be tired, grumpy, short fused, stressed, depressed but they don't call it quits just because they had one bad ... (read in full...)
I found the perfect wedding dress, but it is white!
Q. Hello! I am getting married next spring. Excitment! The other day I went window shopping and I've seen the prettiest little (and very cheap) dress ever. But... it's white! I'm in my early 30s and I'm not a virgin anymore and all the people at my we...
A. 8 August 2012: I really don't think it matters anymore. I think it's all about what you feel like wearing how fabulous the dress is. I don't think anyone really follows the whole white for virgins, off white for non-virgins. Why advertise? Just buy the dress and ... (read in full...)
How do I deal with my 12 year old daughters friend?
Q. It's not love question, but something that's really troubling me, and it seems like there is no way out of this situation. My daughter is 12. She has a best friend for the past 6 years, a girl that they used to go to school with. The fact is th...
A. 8 August 2012: Here are some things I would try if I were you. 1) When your daughter asks if she can invite this friend over, say "Oh, it's not a good day, we're going to the movies, or the beach or to grandma's...Maybe another time." Then just dodge her for ... (read in full...)
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