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*ngelblueeyes agony aunt

*ngelblueeyes

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*ngelblueeyes's profile:

Hi all !

My name is Lu or better known on here as angelblueeyes, i found this site by accident after searching google with a problem & i found everyone else's, i love it on here that much i never left!!

I'm 32 & i live in the midlands with my Soulmate, daughter and god knows how many animals, I am a qualified hairdresser but i gave up my job at Ann Summers 10 years ago to have my beautiful daughter and i never went back after she was born.

I have been married for 12 years but we have been together since i was 16 he is my best friend & a fantastic lover!!

I love walking with my 2 Labs anywhere & everywhere i can get to, Oh i also LOVE shoes ha ha what woman doesn't i currently own around 60 pairs.

I believe that my life experience may be able to help others so this is part of what i have been thro in my life......I lost my mum when i was 8 yrs old, & later on in life i witnessed the awful divorce of my dad and step mum, As a young teenager i took a beating off a b/f, but i feel that shook me into action & it changed my life & made me the person i am today. A few years back i cheated on my husband after having problems in my marriage i took the weak option & fell into the trap of feeling wanted, which was the worst thing i have ever done & i am most certainly not proud of it. I have had my fair share of crap thrown at me but who hasn't? I don't complain i just deal with it in the best way i know how. I am easy going kind of person with a fantastic selection of friends, when things get rough we prop each other up & offer advice, a shoulder & a box of tissues!

Thank's for reading and keep smiling!

1234Next > [4 pages, 129 answers]

Does it automatically make someone selfish if they don't want kids?

Q.   My parents are devastated that I had a vasectomy years ago and that I don't want to have kids. But my question is...why do people accuse me of being selfish because of this? How is it selfish if someone doesn't want kids? My mum said this genera...

A.   1 October 2010: Hi, Firstly I don't think you are selfish at all, responsible is what i would call it. I don't think there is anything wrong with not wanting children some people just don't maybe if and when you meet the right lady things might be different, as f... (read in full...)

Ladies: What is the 'decent size penis?

Q.   One for the ladies, i know most of you will say size doesn't really matter it's the way you rock the boat, but what do ladies think is "the decent size penis" ...

A.   22 September 2009: Hi, i just have to have my say of this as i have read so many people say that size doesn't matter and i know that it does, i was with a guy who had a very small penis sex was rubbish it was just too small, my hubby on the other hand is very well ... (read in full...)

I worry I'll lose it and presto! I do!

Q.   Hi Im a healthy male in a steady relationship of 2 years, we get on great- have plans for the future and are trying for a baby. About three months ago though i started having erection problems...it was when she went to go on top and i 'bent' i...

A.   16 September 2009: Hi, This has happened during my marriage and does unfortunately happen every so often, ED often happens during a mans life for no apparent reason alcohol intake and smoking too can cause problems. I beleive when this happens to my hubby its in his ... (read in full...)

We love each other but...he is married and with 2 kids I'm married too but don't have kids

Q.   well i m a 19 year old girl who met a guy around 5 months bck he is married and with 2 kids i m married too but dont have kids. we love each other like crazy cant live without talking to each other even for a day. he is the manager of a different ...

A.   16 April 2008: Hi, Firtly i agree with liltinky24 but i have to say I have done this also, I met my husband at 16yrs, i married him at 20yrs and i had my daughter at 22yr my life was dull and boring(or what i thought) i too had a thing going with another man that... (read in full...)

Feeling so helpless because he broke up with me over nothing!

Q.   My boyfriend of 4 months just broke up with me. I’m 26 and he’s 24. The reason we broke up was because he thought I was cheating on him with a coworker (technically my boss, but I do not report directly to him). I travel a lot for business and he ...

A.   16 April 2008: Hi, What a pickle you have there do you know if your boyfriend ever had a girlfriend cheat on him before in the past? As maybe this is why he has insecurities with you (been cheated on seen the signs before that kind of thing), Unfortunatly i have... (read in full...)

What is the easiest way to let down a friend that wants to be more?

Q.   What is the easiest way to let down a friend that wants to be more? I have a friend that I get on well with but am not really really close to me, recently he's been keener and keener about doing things with me(just hanging out and stuff) and texts ...

A.   15 April 2008: Hi there, Truthfully the only way is to be honest, you have to talk with him say that you get the impression he wants more from you than friendship (then hopefully you will know the truth) If he does then you will have to explain to him that you... (read in full...)

I'd like to ask her out but the age difference makes me hesitate. How should I handle this?

Q.   I'm 35 yrs old and I am intersted in an 18 yr old. We've talked a few times and I enjoy talking with her. I'd like to ask her out but the age differnce is making me think about it. How should I handle this?...

A.   11 February 2008: Hi, Just had to come back and add that i think you gave a great answer "anon_e_mouse"!! I think sometimes honest opinions is what people need to hear its then up to them to make their choice on the matter. Great answer again!! Lu x... (read in full...)

I noticed a hard lump on my vagina about the size of half a pea. Please help!

Q.   Ok, I didn't notice this until today, it's pretty gross... but I have like a hard lump on my vagina about the size of half a pea. On the outside. It doesn't hurt, it's just... there. I've tried googling this but every site tells me to stop having ...

A.   7 February 2008: Hi, This could be something like an ingrowing hair but i am not a doctor and it could be a number of things so I strongly suggest that you go and see your gp, you will be able to see a female doctor and they will be able to tell you what it is & tr... (read in full...)

I'd like to ask her out but the age difference makes me hesitate. How should I handle this?

Q.   I'm 35 yrs old and I am intersted in an 18 yr old. We've talked a few times and I enjoy talking with her. I'd like to ask her out but the age differnce is making me think about it. How should I handle this?...

A.   7 February 2008: Hi, I once went out with a guy alot older than myself it didn't bother either of us my parents and friends were very supportive which helped out, Alot of the time people find it hard because their family/friends are not supportive because for some... (read in full...)

Broke up with my boyfriend recently, how long should I wait to start a new relationship? (worrying about my reputation)

Q.   I recently broke up with my boyfriend because he cheated, even after I took him back the first time. In total, the relationship lasted 6 weeks, so it was barely serious. I've met a new guy though, that I think I can have a stable and healthy ...

A.   7 February 2008: Hi, If you feel ready to start another relationship then that is up to you. It sound's like you really like this guy so if he is that nice why wait around i'd be quick before someone else beats you to it!! Try not to worry what other people... (read in full...)

Happy Xmas from DearCupid

Q.   Happy Xmas everyone :-) The aunts who share their wisdom, the people who share their questions and the team of moderators who keep everything flowing onto the site! Plus the 350,000 people who visit each month Have a great Xmas! Feel free t...

A.   23 December 2007: Hello to all those fantastic aunt's/unc's I just wanted to wish you all a wonderful christmas with lots of happiness and laughter & a happy new year i'll be back on in 2008!! Love to everyone Lu x... ... (read in full...)

We broke up but I still have dreams of how he cheated on me!

Q.   I broke up with my boyfriend in October when I found out he had cheated on me several times. Finally had the sense to break all contact with him two days ago. But I still have dreams where I see him cheating on me. N it's driving me crazy! Help!...

A.   22 December 2007: Hi That is normal to vision things of someone else when we think of them the idea is that you block them out, you will only send yourself mental if you keep raking over it. I suggest you just forget him and put him at the back of your mind he obvi... (read in full...)

I'm only attracted to older men - does that make me weird?

Q.   i only seem to be attracted to men. im 14 and should be looking at boys my own age but instead im only intersted in men at least over 25..is that really freaky? all the lads in my year are great as mates but theyre just so immature! its doing my ...

A.   18 December 2007: Hi, No i dont think its weird at all i went out with a bloke at 14/15 he was nearly 30, the only thing that is a bit iffey is the underage stuff you just have to remember that side of things, i never slept with him so i never had to cross that brid... (read in full...)

My girlfriend wants me to give up porn...and I would choose her but I refuse to pretend to be something I'm not.

Q.   Before anyone chips in and says that I don't understand this from the female perspective, please hear me out - because I have read posts, and heard views from the female side - and believe me they are pretty mixed. My girlfriend and I have been tog...

A.   13 December 2007: Back again, Very well said anonymous, Reading back on what everyone has written has kept me stuck to my pc for quite a while, I dont think some of the comments were very deserved tho, everyone has a different opinion & just because their views do... (read in full...)

How can I get it into his head that we need some time together?

Q.   I just mopved in with my bf of 11 months about a week and a half ago. I work two jobs..one full and the other part time. The full time one I get home by 5 when I work both I get home around 11. My bf normally works til 8. My problem is since we ...

A.   13 December 2007: Hi, You have to just tell him that you miss your 'alone time' with him, say to him can you make arrangements that he goes to the friends house only 1/2 evenings a wk so that you can have some time alone together, Make sure you make him aware you ... (read in full...)

New feature: Keyword + phrases links

Q.   Hi There are over 40,000 questions here on dearcupid and some absolute gems in amongst them. Problem is it has been hard to make associations between similar questions in order to get the most out of the site. So, I've introduced a new feat...

A.   12 December 2007: Hi everyone I think thats great idea andrew, that will help out everyone well done!!... (read in full...)

My girlfriend wants me to give up porn...and I would choose her but I refuse to pretend to be something I'm not.

Q.   Before anyone chips in and says that I don't understand this from the female perspective, please hear me out - because I have read posts, and heard views from the female side - and believe me they are pretty mixed. My girlfriend and I have been tog...

A.   12 December 2007: Hi, I completely understand where you are coming from, my hubby has quite a selection of porn & i dont think there is anything wrong with it sometimes i even watch it with him. It doesn't mean he wants me any less or that he even finds them attr... (read in full...)

Is my penis too small??

Q.   I am a thirteen year old boy and was wondering if my penis is to small. It's only 5inches when fully erect and 3inches when small. Is it to small?...

A.   12 December 2007: Hi, As far as i'm aware it seems about right for your age (however i am not an expert), but really a child of your age shouldn't be worrying about the size of your penis you have many years of growing to do yet!!... (read in full...)

Should I leave the sweetest guy in the world for my sons father??

Q.   I'm 22 i've been with my boyfriend for 9 months(we've been friends for 5 yrs. I love him and he loves me and my son but i'm not in love with him, and i just ran into my sons father after 10 months. I still love him but when i wanted a relatio...

A.   12 December 2007: Hi, Thats quite a pickle, but really you have already answered your question when you said your not 'in love' with the current b/f but you still love your son's father. When you share a child with someone there will always be a special bond bet... (read in full...)

I think my dad is cheating on my mum...what should I do??

Q.   I think my Dad is cheating on my Mum and i don't know what to do. I am sure he loves my mum and our family but i saw some searches on the internet for escorts all around the world and for things like 'worldwide sex,' he is away on business a lot an...

A.   12 December 2007: Hi The first thing i would say is don't jump to any conclusions just yet without having a chat with him first, it may not seem like it now but there may be a perfectly good reason why this is in your history & it doesn't mean he is cheating on your... (read in full...)

Last night I cheated on my husband. Should I tell him?

Q.   I have a terrible dilemma--I cheated on my husband last night and I don't know if I should tell him or not. We have been together for over seven years (married two), I met him when I was 18 and he's the only guy that I had ever slept with or even ...

A.   12 December 2007: I'm afraid to say that the best way to deal with this is to tell him the truth, otherwise you have built your life on a lie. I have done this (affair tho not 1 night) so i know better than most what this is like, me and my husband worked thro... (read in full...)

Poll question: duration of the sexual act?

Q.   Hey i would like to know how long on average a man can have sex for, i just want to compare. can you give me one number or 2 instead of saying it varies please? Thank you so much xx...

A.   12 December 2007: Hi I find that a funny question as everyone else has already said it will be different for every man, but if this helps my hubbys average is probably 1 hour to quite a few really it depends on the last time the deed was done!!... (read in full...)

She says she's going to leave her husband for me, but I'm not sure, neither me or her husband deserve this, should I say enough is enough?

Q.   i am having an affair with a married girl , i have tried to end it cause i love her but she cannot be with me . but she came right bk the next day saying she had made a mistake to let me go , and i am the only one she wants so i took her bk , and ...

A.   12 December 2007: Hi, I believe you should move on, i don't think she will leave her husband if she loved you that much she would have left him a long time ago. I have been in her situation, i cheated on my husband a few years back i said to the other fella i'd leav... (read in full...)

What can I do to spice things up for him?

Q.   I'm afraid my boyfriend is getting bored with sex as is. It's good, but we have been doing the same three positions for 4 months now. And I'm not very confident in being on top--but I'm willing to try new things for him. What can I do to spice ...

A.   12 December 2007: Hi We all have this problem at some point i'm sure, you need to find something that excites the both of you would you consider dressing up for him maybe or even role play, it puts a bit of fun in to it. There are so many different position... (read in full...)

I don't want to end up end up comprimising our relationship because of my trust issues.

Q.   I have, almost major trust issues, with my girlfriend. she is christian and she says that its against her religion to cheat. but i have strong feelings that she is affiliated with another man. im 14 and shes 15 and we are crazy about eachother. we ...

A.   12 December 2007: Hi, Your very welcome keolakins if i can be of any further assistance give me a yell!! Lu x... (read in full...)

I got back together with my ex, but I am not sure that was a good idea. I just don't feel the same anymore!

Q.   My partner and I split up in February. We didn't live together or anything but we had been seeing each other for just over 4 years when we split. Things hadn't been good for around 6 months before the split and I felt we were at different points ...

A.   11 December 2007: Hi, I have not been in that situation so all i can offer is my opinion if it will help any. I say that you should talk with him about how you are feeling tell him its not what you want anymore, & what you once shared together has gone, its no g... (read in full...)

Is he a mental case or just naturally violent?

Q.   My b/f of 2 yrs seems to disagree with almost all my opinions. He talks loudly and emotionally throwing hands when reacting to my opinions. This really upsets me, i feel intimidated because i do not like it at all. Sometimes I choose to keep my ...

A.   11 December 2007: Hi Everyone is allowed to have a differance of an opinion, however if he is aggressive towards you and makes you feel so unhappy then i would walk away now, i know thats easy for me to say when i am not in your situation but truthfully can you imag... (read in full...)

Am I EVER going to orgasm?

Q.   Hey this may be a bit of a stupid question but here goes: I dont think Ive ever had an orgasm. ever! Im with a great bf who's VERY large down there! and great in bed! im not joking, he is the best guy ive been with. But ive been with a few guys...

A.   11 December 2007: Hi there, How frustrating this must be for you, many years ago i was the same but once i found it there was no stopping me. I am sure you are aware of the 2 special points that woman have for stimulation but i'll tell you anyway 1 of these is inter... (read in full...)

Did I act foolishly by suggesting if she is wasting my time... ? How can I mend this?

Q.   Hi, I was dating this girl - we have gone out about 15 times. Every time was great and she showed real interest. She told me once she was falling for me so her walls were going up. The last couple times we hung out she was distant but we still wou...

A.   11 December 2007: Hi i dont think there was anything wrong with wanting to know where you stood in the situation maybe just the way you went about it. Have you called her or spoke to her since it went wrong, maybe just arrange to meet have a chat & discuss things o... (read in full...)

I don't want to end up end up comprimising our relationship because of my trust issues.

Q.   I have, almost major trust issues, with my girlfriend. she is christian and she says that its against her religion to cheat. but i have strong feelings that she is affiliated with another man. im 14 and shes 15 and we are crazy about eachother. we ...

A.   11 December 2007: Hi, Is there another reason why you have massive trust issues at such a young age? I think you really need to sort yourself out maybe talk with a counciller if you feel ok doing so, give the poor girl a break you will only push her a way if you k... (read in full...)

15, pregnant, and my parents are angry with me. What should I do?

Q.   I am 15 and pregnant. I am soooo scared but feel that with support i can do this. My boyfriend has just turned 18, he is my brothers friend. He says he will support me whatever happens, he has a good job and says he will do everything to support his ...

A.   10 December 2007: Hi, Firstly they are your parents and they are only doing what they feel is the best way to protect you. I'm sure in time they will come round to the idea of your b/f being there, they are hurting right now their baby is soon going to have her... (read in full...)

I've just realized I'm bisexual, and there's a long distance guy who wants me to be his boyfriend. But will that be too hard?

Q.   i just recently realised that i'm bi and me (16) and this guy in another state(14) REALLY like each other and he wants me to be his boyfriend. I really don't know what to do because i've never done the whole long distance thing or the whole boyfrien...

A.   10 December 2007: Hi, I am a person that does not really believe that long distance relationships can work..been there and it didnt! Only you can answer that question really, do you truely feel for this guy? what would you do if you were 'with' this guy and you met ... (read in full...)

He's abusive but I love him and I'm scared to leave him.

Q.   Hi I have a huge problem. My husband is very abusive mentally and rarely physically. We have two kids and since my first child was born I gained some weight and I feel very fat cause he makes me feel like that. When we got married my husband ...

A.   10 December 2007: Hi, Firstly you deserve better you children shouldn't have to listen to that on a daily basis. Who gave him the right to talk to you like that i have been in a relationship with physical & mental abuse and im afraid it doesnt go away over night. ... (read in full...)

Will he ever change? What should I do?

Q.   I want to get back with my ex even though we have different religious beliefs and I believe in waiting to have sex for marriage and he doesn't. And he thinks it's not a big deal to smoke but I do. He doesn't want me talking about how I think he ...

A.   10 December 2007: Hi I think choosing to be with someone who has different beliefs can sometimes be very hard work, you have to remember that both of your beliefs are different and each of you are doing what you believe is right. Its not right making either o... (read in full...)

Why does it bother me so much?

Q.   ladies please help me i'm a mess. Here it goes I was with a girl 4 about 2 years off and on not my doing totally hers. I believe i was great to her trying my heart out to make things work between us. Everybody in our circle would tell me how good i ...

A.   10 December 2007: Hi How you are feeling is perfectly normal, at the end of the day when you truely love someone and they break your heart it can take many months or even longer to heal. There is nothing wrong with you & eventually you will feel ready to move on ... (read in full...)

He keeps asking how I want it. What does he mean?

Q.   i just got out of a 3 year relationship, recently i started to have sex with my friend he keeps asking how i want it while we are having sex. what does he mean by that? my ex never asked me that!...

A.   10 December 2007: Hi, He means what makes you tick, do you like it hard or soft & what position best does it for you. Its nice it means he is kean to please you!! Good luck! Lu x ... (read in full...)

He couldn't get hard... why?

Q.   I went to a wedding with my boyfriend, afterwards we headed to a motel to have sex for the first time, so he starts kissing me and removing my clothes, I was so ready! But I guess he wasn't because he wasn't erect! I asked him what was wrong, and he ...

A.   10 December 2007: Hi, I have to say dont panic this does happen to many men mine included! it is very unlikly that the 'problem' is anything to do with you, quite often its the worry of not performing very well etc. I find that if you help him to relax complete... (read in full...)

If I lose weight will my chest get smaller?

Q.   IF I lose weight will my chest size get smaller?...

A.   10 December 2007: Hi, I assume that you are taking about your breasts? I have to say yes they will but if you only lose a small amount of weight then they may not change much, i have always had a F cup but i lost a massive amount of weight a couple of yrs ago and ... (read in full...)

Having previously used a vibrator, will my 'first time' be less painful?

Q.   Hi Guys Just a quick one, Im a 20 year old virgin and i think me and my boyfriend will be taking the next step soon enough, Now i know about protection and not to do it if its not right, my question is i have used a vibrator before so will hav...

A.   10 December 2007: Hi, I have heard loads of people saying about pain on their first time, truthfully i never had this problem. I think you just need to take things slow, dont rush in cause that is when it will cause pain, try using lubricant that will help. H... (read in full...)

I'm pooing a lot - am I pregnant?

Q.   I was Fooling around with my boy friend and i was in my THIN pjs and he was on top of me naked and i think he ejected pre cum but im not sure... later on we had sex with a condom on but this morning i feel sick and im always feeling thirsty and im ...

A.   10 December 2007: Hi You won't know if you are pregnant for sure until your period is due, i doulbt that you are but i am not a doctor & i am only offering my opinion. The best way to deal with this situation is to take the morning after pill this is effectiv... (read in full...)

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