All he wants is sex, what should I do?
Q. Me and my boyfriend have been together since July and I don’t know him he loves me he says he does but all he wants is sex I love him with all my heart but do I stay or leave should I wait a year ...
A. 25 December 2017: I think you might need to tell him what you want. Young men do want sex all the time, but with the right direction they can be trained! He might not know what you are expecting from this relationship. He might feel that he is showing his love ... (read in full...)
I'm ready to get back into the dating scene, but there are a few bridges to cross first!
Q. So, to start off, I haven't dated anyone or pursued anyone in any way for over a year now, but recently, I have been thinking about getting back into the dating world now that things have been going great in my life as far as my health and financial ...
A. 25 December 2017: I'm about as inexperienced as it gets when it comes to lesbian dating, but as a man if I liked her I'd test the water to see if she's open minded.
Ask her a few questions that will show her political views, perhaps talk about current events that... (read in full...)
His depression is sending me back to my depressed days
Q. Hey everyone . I have been with my boyfriend for 4 months at first everything was great as usual , weve got to know each other really well in that time and hes told me he suffers really bad depression .I have tried my best to support him in any way ...
A. 25 December 2017: One more thing to add, if he is so depressed he might harm himself you should contact a member of his family.
If you don't have their numbers then you have to call the police. They will ensure he gets access to acute mental health services... (read in full...)
Why me? Why now?
Q. I probably sound pathetic but sometimes things get to me and usually I have no-one to talk to because no1 understands. This week I told my boyfriend I would see him this weekend we both agreed (it fits in with us both). I called him. He answered. I ...
A. 25 December 2017: You were planning on having kids in the New Year? You aren't married or living together. You have a few hurdles to jump over before children I think. Are you sure your expectations/perceptions of this relationship are realistic?
It's pretty m... (read in full...)
My boyfriend doesn't want to be near me when I am sick.
Q. Dear Cupid I'm with my bf for past 2 years and it's going on good and we meet on weekends and stay together on weekend. One thing that concerns me, not sure if I should be, he doesn't want to meet and around me whenever I'm sick, he says he doesn...
A. 22 December 2017: People are very very different when it comes to how to treat people when they are ill, when I was young I was sent to my room, and left to my own devices, a meal would arrive at meal times on a tray and then my mum would get on with her thing, it ... (read in full...)
Playing truth or dare .... I didnt like his answer.
Q. I’ve been talking to this boy he’s in the same year as me but in a different school and tonight we were playing truth or dare I asked him what the most he had done with a girl is and he said he wants to take it back but he’s fingered someone.Ohhh ...
A. 22 December 2017: He hasn't done anything wrong to you, you just don't like his answer! Assuming he's being honest, he can't change what is in the past so you need to unpack why it has upset you. Did you want him to be totally inexperienced? You'd better throw that ... (read in full...)
How do I stay out of friends argument?
Q. Hello Aunts and Uncles, two if my dear friends had a fight, I stayed out of it. The one who's in the wrong keeps insisting I take her side, the one who's right is glad I'm out of it. I keep telling the one who's insistent that I like them both an...
A. 20 December 2017: If she's out of line, tell her-I'm not sure how her knowing she's being shunned is win for her. Being able to dispassionatly gently tell a friend that they are wrong is tough but a good skill to have. If they are a real grown up they should be able ... (read in full...)
Going cold on wedding plans
Q. I'm engaged to be married next August, and although I do not have any doubts over whether it's what I want, or my fiancée feelings either, I'm just not excited about any part of it. Recently we have been seeing friends and family due to Christmas...
A. 20 December 2017: I know how you feel. My wife and I were married this year and although we very much love eachother, and are now genuinely happy to be married to each other we were not really terribly excited about the marriage itself. It just seemed to be a massive ... (read in full...)
I don't think I can ever trust again...Even my family
Q. Generally, I am not open at all. Not shy either. Just prefer to keep things private and off limits. This has happened because I've lost trust so many times that I built up this barrier, and I know it's unhealthy. But that's happened because of ...
A. 20 December 2017: Sorry this is way too cryptic. I have no idea whether your family are all out to get you or whether you just take yourself too seriously. But I'll tell you one thing, you should never think of a child as a 'snake'... (read in full...)
My father and I have different views on life and it's holding me back from being myself
Q. I live with my mom and dad while working and going to school part time to finish my degree. My mom and I have always been close but my dad and I not so much. I was always his little 'princess' growing up and loved to go camping/fishing ...
A. 18 December 2017: You are an adult in your eyes,in the eyes of the law too, but if you are still living with your parents they will still view you as their child. It is infantilising to living with your parents as they can always and legitimately say 'our house,our ... (read in full...)
Could it be my social anxiety or am I right to feel left out?
Q. Hey guys I need your help with something. About a month ago I went out with my boyfriend and a few of his friends, two of them being a girl and her boyfriend. My boyfriend still has a big friend group from when he was at school (girls and guys)...
A. 18 December 2017: You are asking alot of people you don't know that well to make alot of changes to their plans to accommodate your social anxiety. I think what you are trying to break into is an established group of friends who are already comfortable with each ... (read in full...)
Is my boyfriend too sexually demanding?
Q. I’ve been with my boyfriend around half a year. He has really bad anger issues which he has been trying to control but he still has his outbursts. One of the things that triggers these outbursts is when I don’t give him head when he wants it. ...
A. 17 December 2017: I think you have to forget about the money. It's better to have a clean break from this man than be endlessly tied to him trying and likely failing to retrieve this cash. Think as it as a sunk cost and count it as worth a thousand bucks to be free ... (read in full...)
Is my boyfriend too sexually demanding?
Q. I’ve been with my boyfriend around half a year. He has really bad anger issues which he has been trying to control but he still has his outbursts. One of the things that triggers these outbursts is when I don’t give him head when he wants it. ...
A. 17 December 2017: You are doing what he asks out of fear. This is abuse. Leave him as soon as you can. This man is not a good partner he is a grown up baby who has a tantrum, kicks screams and lashes out when he doesn't get what he wants. As You cannot be Serious ... (read in full...)
Our intimacy is gone and I don't know what to think or say?!?
Q. Don’t know what to think or say!! I haven been married for 15 years to a wonderful lady. Like every marriage we have encountered ups and downs. For about a year our intimacy is gone. She gets off work at 5:30pm arrives home at 8:30pm. She is a...
A. 17 December 2017: I think you need to sit your wife down and ask her how you need to reconnect. I don't think there is cheating but there is something missing. Good luck... (read in full...)
What is a normal amount of sex?
Q. Im 30 years old and have been with my boyfriend for 10 years. We don't have any kids. How much sex would be 'normal'? Id say on average we probably do it twice a month. ...
A. 15 December 2017: What's normal? The correct amount of sex is the amount of sex that a couple agree on. Some couples are many times a week, others do it far fewer times. The problem lies when one of a couple wants it more or less than the other. There's no point in ... (read in full...)
My negative body image is ruining my life in every way
Q. Dear cupid, without going into too much detail, I used to be overweight through out all my teen years, and after a major depression for a period of over 3 years, I was obese at 340 pounds. Over the past 2 years I got weight loss surgery and have...
A. 15 December 2017: I think you shouldn't date for a while. Meeting men when you have a low self image is likely to result in you going for the absolute worst kind of guys who will be able to see that in you. Sorry they are out there and they are not good people. Try ... (read in full...)
My female friend said she had an "inappropriate" dream about me. What could it be?
Q. A friend of the opposite gender brought something up. We were talking about dreams, all sorts of dreams, and then she said 'I had a dream about you recently'. I asked what the dream was about and then after a long pause she responded with 'it's ...
A. 15 December 2017: It was probably a sex dream. The fact that she had one doesn't mean anything in itself- but the fact that she didn't want to share it with you probably means she has thought about it and doesn't feel that way about you when she is awake. ... (read in full...)
Is this my motherhood talking or would I have changed my mind as I grew older anyway?
Q. I have a daughter who will soon become a teenager. (they grow up sooo fast!). My sister commented that we'll soon have some dating-drama in the house. Which made me think of my teenage and young adult years. What would I do as a mother if my dau...
A. 15 December 2017: I think you're right to be skeptical. There is too much power ceded to the older party in these relationships. This isn't to say they are being abused or mistreated but there is something a little off. It could be just youth that is attractive to ... (read in full...)
On and off relationship with FWB has me confused
Q. So I been seeing this guy off and on since 2011, we hooked up, gone out slept over each other houses and all. We got into a huge fight stopped talking and recently start talking again. But this time he's more distant when I text him so doesn't reply ...
A. 12 December 2017: You should stop seeing him. It's kinder to you. He doesn't want what you want so to heal and make space to meet someone who wants the same as you,you should break contact. Block him so you aren't tempted. He isn't going to change. He might say he ... (read in full...)
My roommate and her boyfriend constantly hog my couch, but other than that, they're not much of a bother. Am I right in feeling irritated?
Q. I'm not sure if this is ok to ask, but I'm having issues with my roommate. I feel like I may possibly be overreacting, so tell me your thoughts. We've lived together without issues since July. However, she has a long distance boyfriend who vi...
A. 11 December 2017: Couldn't you get another comfy chair? It's sociable to have more chairs than the exact number of house residents! You could come to some accord about the cost but booking time in the common area sound much more hassle than just having the right ... (read in full...)
I'm paranoid about getting someone pregnant.
Q. I'm paranoid about getting someone pregnant. I'm currently 31 and have had 1 or 2 sexual partners every year since my mid twenties. Every time I do have sex I use the condom properly, and most of the women I've been with are also on the p...
A. 10 December 2017: You probably are over anxious about the chances. If the statistics comfort you do you take into account the statistical probability of becoming pregnant even if birth control fails? You could factor this in to show that the incidences of actial ... (read in full...)
She's left me twice does she deserve my respect? Or do I just be her friend like nothing ever happened?
Q. Hello ladies, got a question for you, I was seeing this woman, she left me for another guy, OK, five years later we started to see each other again, she did it again, with a friend in a band, now he dumped her and she is trying to talk to me, am I ...
A. 10 December 2017: You are plan b my friend. She'll exploit the fact you like her and then drop you when something better comes along. Sounds pretty unpleasant to me. If you can live with it then carry on but don't expect her to change.... (read in full...)
I still don't know if he's prepared to be in the sort of relationship I want to be in.
Q. My boyfriend of 2 years have spent the last 4/5 months very much on off. We initially broke up 4 months ago because we started back at uni and he was spending none of his time with me, with all his free time dedicated to going out with his friends, ...
A. 10 December 2017: Haven't you asked about this guy before? The only way you are going to know is if he changes his behaviour. If he's willing to stay in with you and seems happy then you know it's possible he wants what you do. If he reverts to type, starts going out ... (read in full...)
Are they together or is she now his ex?
Q. I went on my first date with a guy. I asked him if he's married and he said no. He is semi-famous and has all his life online basically. I did some research and found out that it's possible he has a girlfriend or wife or some sort. On her IG,...
A. 10 December 2017: You were too specific. You should have asked if he was with anyone, had a I refried or SO? He wasn't 'techincally'lying but yeah he has someone else.
Or, he has very very recently broken up from a serious relationship.
Either way steer well c... (read in full...)
A practical joke gone horribly wrong
Q. My friend Bailey and I played a joke on our friend Eve just to embarrass her and teach her a lesson but Bailey took it too far and now Eve got suspended and her parents punished her real bad. She's not aloud to talk to us or anyone or go anywhere ...
A. 10 December 2017: If it was you who had pulled the prank you must have courage and own up. Since you know who did it you must tell Bailey to own up or you will tell the school for her That's integrity. If you caused someone innocent to be punished you must accept the ... (read in full...)
Dealing with low self-esteem and body image from acne scars
Q. Hi guys, I have been dating a guy for close to 2 months. We have a great connection and i really like him. But he cares too much about physical appearance. I think I am good looking, both body and face, but have hypopigmented acne scars on my...
A. 7 December 2017: If this guy cares too much about physical appearance- why do you like him? Do you like vain shallow people? Are you a bit like that yourself, and you feel that this is your one flaw? If you stay with him are you not consigning yourself to a life of ... (read in full...)
I want her back but she doesn't want a relationship. How can she just walk away?
Q. So, there was this girl I met two years ago and I am in love with her (we dated and were pretty serious) . I am in the military and I was stationed in Alaska.( Where I met her, I am originally from Florida). But I hurt her and she well I left ...
A. 7 December 2017: You are some pretty entitled guy. You drop her when she's at her lowest ebb and when you decide you want her back you ignore what she is saying and what she wants because it's not what you want? You didn't have time to deal with the crisis in her ... (read in full...)
I am getting weird vibes from my girlfriend in regards to her friend but I don't want to tell her to stop talking to her friend
Q. So my girlfriend had this mate that they've meet on tinder. She calls my girlfriend everyday and texts her. Practically any social media she can contact my gf. Just a couple of days ago my gf said that they've kissed. I've meet the friend and all I ...
A. 20 November 2017: I think the best rule to follow here is that if it walks like a duck and quacks like a duck,then it's a duck. If she met her on Tinder and they message each other all the time and they kiss then they aren't friends even if that's what your GF says ... (read in full...)
Mr Nice Guy is perfect for me but why do I feel something is missing?
Q. I have a history of dating unavailable, cheating, lying, game playing men. In fact when I look back I've only ever had one healthy relationship that I ended up pushing away with my own actions. This guy is amazing! I am insanely attracted to him...
A. 17 November 2017: It may well be that you feel the need for drama. It's great that you can see this in the pattern of your relationships. I'm not knocking this man but it is possible to be great on paper but not ignite the fires you need to make things stick. It's ... (read in full...)
Could this relationship be wrong?
Q. I am falling in love with my soon to be step uncle and I don't know what to do. Do I end things now before it gets out of hand or do we carry on being like we are and tell people about us ? Is it forbidden to date him ??...
A. 17 November 2017: Well OP, that's far more benign than I thought. I personally wouldn't give it a second thought. Crack on1... (read in full...)
Help me find my way out of these abusive traps
Q. I am in a 16-year-relationship that became sexless and violent, abusive. I was thrown out the house in middle of night. I left and he wants me back. While away I met another man who I fell in love with and been seeing for a year this man seems quite ...
A. 16 November 2017: How about neither of them? If you've just cone out of a bad 16 year old relationship then you need to breathe and spend some time on your own, perhaps thinking about why you would choose two poor men over being single?
Do you believe that being in a... (read in full...)
Could this relationship be wrong?
Q. I am falling in love with my soon to be step uncle and I don't know what to do. Do I end things now before it gets out of hand or do we carry on being like we are and tell people about us ? Is it forbidden to date him ??...
A. 16 November 2017: Well it's not illegal. But that isn't even the half of it. I'm guessing you're 18 by 1999 in your username so you are an adult, however there are complex repercussions from relationships like this- is he much older than you? Did he know you from ... (read in full...)
Should I be the first to call like always, or should I let her reach out this time?
Q. I have been in a seven-year relationship with my girlfriend/ex-girlfriend (I'm not sure which is accurate at this point). We have always struggled with how we resolve conflict. We've been through the break-up-make-up cycle many times. Each time ...
A. 15 November 2017: Honestly, if the fight is stupid and she doesn't want to make up, is the relationship worth saving? It seems a lot of relationships struggle with assigning the correct amount of gravity to fights, it may be because of pride or just that you have bot... (read in full...)
Mixed up by his communication
Q. I was dating this guy a while back. It's kind of a long story and I guess I just want some opinions on his actions or reasons why. I had moved to the city for some short term work. We had met at a bar but nothing really went further than tha...
A. 12 November 2017: I don't think it was a last word thing but you have to put things into perspective. You had a big work thing and you prioritized it over your meetings with him. This is totally fine. But it commodifies where he stands with you. This us also fine. If ... (read in full...)
Walked into an awkward love triangle
Q. Hi, for the last 6 months or so I have liked one of the men (call him Tim) from my workplace. He is one of quite a few men and women that are in our lunch group and we all go out for drinks and things like that fairly often. He has been in a co...
A. 12 November 2017: It's never a good idea to get together with a person when they are fresh out of a relationship. He is likely to be in no place to work out where his feelings are to wards anyone. You did the right thing to put off any romantic entanglements but Mary ... (read in full...)
The guy I'm dating doesn't believe I have social anxiety, does it matter?
Q. I've been on a few dates with this guy. I feel a bit of a spark but I am worried about something he said to me. Part of me feels that if I liked him enough to date him I won't worry about what he said. I told him that I suffer from social anxi...
A. 9 November 2017: I think rather than denying it, he was playing it down, perhaps it was a clumsy way of saying you have the courage to do things in spite of it. I'm with Denizen- its not a defining feature of you, so why are you so protective of it? Is it diagnosed? ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend thinks he should be consulted about my mother's estate
Q. Is it wrong to not consider my boyfriends opinion regarding my house? My mom passed away last year and my cousin is helping me get the house in my name. He and I agreed that refinancing the remaining amount of the mortgage was the best option for ...
A. 6 November 2017: Sorry, your house, your rules. However it might have been wise to ask his opinion if you two plan to stay together, but you have no obligation to listen to him.
When you have a house together you'll have to make decisions together, but not yet.... (read in full...)
My Boyfriend excluded me to his brother's funeral because his ex was going
Q. Hello, I am after some opinions please as to whether I am over analysing things and being silly or if I am right to feel upset and rejected. I am new to this site and so am expecting there may be some readers who will judge me pretty harshly...
A. 6 November 2017: I'm sorry this must be deeply hurtful and upsetting for you.
BUT you have to remember this is not about you or him, he may not even be responsible for this request, his family may have asked that this be the way that it is, you may have felt tha... (read in full...)
What is so "personal" that he can't tell his long term girlfriend?
Q. Hi! I've been seeing my bf for about 15 months and things have been mostly good. We have a very loving, affectionate relationship where we share most things and get on well. Except he has this female best friend that he's close to and the thing is I ...
A. 6 November 2017: He is keeping her confidence- he is being a good friend. If she wanted you to know she'd have told you. It's really none of your business and no couples don't tell each other everything, especially things told to them in confidence. ... (read in full...)
Should I stay with my boyfriend in the hope that he matures at some point, or do I let him go and move on?
Q. Should I stay with my boyfriend in the hope that he matures at some point, or do I let him go and move on? We're both at university (we're both 21) and have been going out for 2 years. We've been having problems lately because he wasn't spending ...
A. 6 November 2017: I don't think its about maturity, its more about how he sees his priorities. Right now you are lower on his list than going out with his friends. Will that change? Perhaps, perhaps not. Does he invite you out when he goes out or does he ... (read in full...)
My husband is flat out lying to me!
Q. Is it ok to snoop if i am being lied to? My husband keeps telling me that his 'penis is broken'. We havent had sex in two months or so. Hes massively stressed out. The thing is that in the last two weeks i have given him two blowjobs and we have act...
A. 5 November 2017: It's not wrong to look for evidence if your hubby is being evasive, but it isn't helpful at all. Just because he can master bate and become erect doesn't mean he's lying about his penis being broken. He might have performance issues where the ... (read in full...)
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